Favorite movie quotes.

In My Humble Opinion
1

Well? Let’s here 'em.

Oh, wait, I seem to remember this being done before…
Why didn’t the search turn up any results, then?
Anyway, fuck it, let’s do it again!

A few of my favorites (I have so many…)

“Fate, it seems, is not without a sense of irony.”
-Morpheus, The Matrix

“Lincoln freed the slaves-what?-like 130 years ago? How long does it take to get your act together?”
-Derek Vineyard, American History X

“This conversation is over.”
-Narrator/Tyler Durden, Fight Club

“You listened to me? Haven’t I made it abundantly clear during the tenure of our relationship that I don’t know shit?”
-Brodie, Mallrats

“You think you’re bigtime? You’re gonna die! Big time! You ready? Here come the pain!”
-Carlito Brigante, Carlito’s Way

“Holy God…”
-Big Joe Cabot, Reservoir Dogs

“You wanna test my resolve? My willingness to go to edge… past it? You wanna find out where I start and you end? Well? Do ya, Frank?”
-Peter McCabe Desperate Measures

“I hate to see you go, but I love watchin’ you leave.”
-Castor Troy, Face/Off

“The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he, who in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother’s keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee.”
-Jules Winfield, Pulp Fiction

“Listen! And understand! That terminator is out there. It can’t be bargained with! It can’t be reasoned with! It doesn’t feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And it absolutely will not stop-ever!-until you are dead!”
-Kyle Reese, The Terminator

"Banky: Alright, now see this? This is a four-way road, OK? And dead in the center is a crisp, new, hundred dollar bill. Now, at the end of each of these streets are four people, OK? Are you following?

Holden: Yeah.

Banky: Good. Over here, we have a male-affectionate, easy to get along with, non-political agenda lesbian. Down here, we have a man-hating, angry as fuck, agenda of rage, bitter dyke. Over here, we got Santa Claus, and up here the Easter Bunny. Which one is going to get to the hundred dollar bill first?

Holden: What is this supposed to prove?

Banky: No, I’m serious. This is a serious exercise. It’s like an SAT question. Which one is going to get to the hundred dollar bill first? The male-friendly lesbian, the man-hating dyke, Santa Claus, or the Easter bunny?

Holden: The man-hating dyke.

Banky: Good. Why?

Holden: I don’t know.

Banky: Because the other three are figments of your fucking imagination!"
-Banky Edwards and Holden McNeil, Chasing Amy

“Bitch, what you don’t know about me I can just about squeeze in the Grand fucking Canyon. Did you know I always wanted to be a dancer in Vegas?”
-Silent Bob Chasing Amy

"Jay: So why the long face, Horace? Banky on the rag?

Holden: I’m just, ahh… just havin’ a little girl trouble.

Jay: Bitch pressin’ charges? I get that a lot."
-Jay Phat Buds and Holden McNeil, again, Chasing Amy

“Your body’s dying. Pay no attention.”
-Lestat, Interview with the Vampire

"Hitchhiker: 7’s the key number here. Think about it. 7-Elevens. 7 doors. 7, man, that’s the number. 7 chipmunks twirlin’ on a branch, eatin’ lots of sunflowers on my uncle’s ranch. You know that old children’s tale from the sea. It’s like you’re dreamin’ about Gorgonzola cheese when it’s clearly Brie time, baby. Step into my office.

Ted: Why?

Hitchhiker: ‘Cause you’re fuckin’ fired!"
-Hitchhiker loon and Ted Stroehmann, There’s Something About Mary

2

“You are ten seconds away from the most embarrasing moment of your life!”

“As you wish”

“brk brk brk… oh f*&k missed me cue again” (Imitate chicken noises here)

“Go away or I shall taunt you a second time”

“Always look on the bright side of death”

3

“I’ll torture you so slowly you’ll think it’s a career! I’ll kill your mother, your father and the b!tch you took to the prom!”

“Betty Jo Gaborski? I can get you a number on that if you want.”

I’m not afraid to die. All men die. But not all men get to live.

BIG badda boom!!

The water’s wet, the skies blue, women have secrets… who gives a…?

Back off man: I’m a scientist/ no-one steps on a church in my town!!

4

GODDAMIT!!! The above post was actually mine not poor wyldelf’s… don’t chastise her for my taste.

hangs head in apolgy while muttering about sharing a computer atm

5

“I’d like a falafel with hot sauce, a side order of baba ganouj, and a seltzer, please.”

“I would like a nice, powerful, mind-altering substance. Preferably one that will make my unborn children grow gills.”

“Here’s to red meat, Rene.”

“Do you know the story of Sisyphus?”

All from Parker Posey, all from Party Girl.

Those are all I can think up right now.

6

“Son , you got a panty on your head…”
“well, OK then”

“Now honey, there’s what’s right and there’s what’s right…and never the twain shall meet.”
“…maybe his advisers are confused.”
“…only 2 hours a day,either educational , or football, so you don’t lose your apprieciation of the finer things”

-Ra=ising Arizona

7

aaaackkk
sorry
-Raising Arizona

8

wyldelf! And here I was about to post that very Hudson Hawk quote! Tell me you’ll be there to back me up in the threads where I’m the only one defending it? :slight_smile:

A few favorites:

“History, tradition, culture, are not concepts! These are trophies I keep in my den as paperweights!”
–Hudson Hawk
[/quote]

“We’ve gone on holiday by mistake!”
–Withnail and I
[/quote]

“Its amazing. You look like a normal person but actually you are the angel of death.”
–When Harry Met Sally
[/quote]

“Ah, here it is. ‘Breach hull - all die.’ Even had it underlined.”

“Well believe me, Mike, I calculated the odds of this succeeding versus the odds I was doing something incredibly stupid… and I went ahead anyway.”
–"Mystery Science Theater 3000: The Movie

9

Just saw dpr’s post. Serves me right for getting all excited and posting before I read the rest of the thread! So, what I just said. But dpr instead of wyldelf.

Wait…this is just a hideous scheme to boost wyldelf’s post count, isn’t it? :slight_smile:

10

Fuck that fucking fuck fuck fuck fuck! - Scarface

all of Blues Brothers.

Fats man, lemme tell you my story… - Wierd Science

11

“Mom, if you ever did a German Sheisse movie, you’d tell me, right?” – Cartman

“Your ass is huge and red. Who would I be thinking of, Liza Minelli?” – Saddam Hussien

12

“Them those balloons that blow up in funny shapes?”

“Not 'less ROUND’S funny”

-Raising Arizona

“Good? Bad? I’m the guy with the gun.”

-Ash, Army of Darkness

“Out we come, bloody and squalling, with the knowledge that for all the points of the compass, there is only one direction, and time is its measure.”

-Rosencrantz (or was it Guildenstern?), Rosencrantz and Guuildenstern are Dead

13

Gale: Alright, you hayseeds! It’s a stickup! Everybody freeze. Everybody down on the ground.
Bank Patron: Well, which is it young fellah? You want I should freeze, or get down on the ground? I mean to say, if’n I freeze, I can’t rightly drop. And, if’n I drop, I’m gonna be in motion.
H.I.: I’ll be takin’ these Huggies, and, uh, whatever cash you got.
H.I.: The doctor explained that her insides were a rocky place, where my seed could find no purchase.
Counsellor: Why do you say you feel trapped in a man’s body?
Convict: Well, sometimes I get the menstrual cramps, real hard.

14

Wyatt: How’s your joint, George?
George: Oh my…I believe it went out. I got to talkin’ so much I clean forgot about it…went out.
Wyatt: Well, save it. We’ll do it first thing tomorrow morning. Gives you a whole new way of looking at the day.
George: Well, I sure could use that! Yes, I sure could use a little of that!
Easy Rider-

Doc Holliday: I’m your Huckleberry.
Tombstone

FRANK: Don’t be a good neighbor to her or I’m gonna send you a love letter. straight from my heart, fucker. You know what a love letter is? It’s a bullet. straight from my gun, fucker. Once you get a love letter from me, you’re fucked forever. Understand, Fuck?
JEFFREY: Yes.
Blue Velvet

15

“When you have to shoot, SHOOT. Don’t talk.”
—Tuco, The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

“You see, in this world there’s two kinds of people, my friend: Those with loaded guns and those who dig. You dig.”
—(Eastwood character), The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly
(Actually, just about any line in this movie.)

“4 jacks”
—Henry Gondorff, The Sting, and later,

“What was I supposed to do – call him for cheating better than me in front of the others?”
—Doyle Lonnigan

16

“My God Vanessa’s got a fabulous body. I bet she shags like a minx. I wonder if they realize that as a result of the unfreezing process I have no inner monologue? <hesitates> I hop I didn’t say that out loud just now…”
“You’re not quite evil enough. You’re semi-evil. You’re quasi-evil. You’re the margarine of evil. You’re the Diet Coke of evil, just one calorie, not evil enough.”
(Okay guys let’s face it, there are a ton of great Austin Powers quotes…I could go on all day…)

“To this day this picture still makes me horny–I mean WISTFUL! It makes me WISTFUL!” ~Dirty Work

“To the weenie-mobile! Weenie man away!!”
“Cal, are you going to work naked again?”
“I’ll put you in the bitch adaptor…”
~all from Mystery Science Theater 300: the Movie (another one we could quote all day…)

“Well, I’m gonna get out of bed every morning…breathe in and out all day long. Then, after awhile I won’t have to remind myself to get out of bed every morning and breathe in and out…and then after awhile I won’t have to think about how I had it great and perfect for awhile.”
~Sam Baldwin, “Sleepless in Seattle”

Jay: “Well this is fate! She’s divorced, we don’t want to redo the cabinets, and you need a wife. What do they call it when everything intersects?”
Sam: “The Bermuda Triangle”
~Sleepless in Seattle

I have like, a ton more (self-proclaimed movie buff) but ya know…no room. :smiley:

17

Rumack: I’m going to tell you something I’ve kept to myself all of these years. I was in the war, Medical Corps. One night they brought in a badly wounded pilot from one of the raids. He looked at me and said, “Doc, the odds were against us up there, but we went in anyway. I’m glad. Captain made the right decision.” That pilot’s name was George Zip.

Stryker: George Zip said that?

Rumack: Yes, he looked at me and said, “Doc,” he said, “Some time, when the crew is up against it, and the breaks are beating the boys, tell 'em to get out there and give it all they’ve got. And win just one for the Zipper. I don’t know where I’ll be then Doc, he said. But I won’t smell too good, that’s for sure.”

Stryker: Excuse me, doc. I’ve got a plane to land.

[cue Notre Dame fight song]

18

This quote is from an episode of MST3K (The Unearthly). It comes as our protagonist enters a room filled with various mad scientific looking things around.

Crow: Sausages,…a four track,…a toaster…They’re recording breakfast!!!

19

Captain James T. Kirk: Let’s take a look. Full sensor scan, Mr. Spock. They can’t expect us not to look them over now.
Commander Willard Decker: Now that we’re looking down their throat.
Captain James T. Kirk: Right, now that we got them just where they want us.
- Star Trek: The Motion Picture

McCoy: Where are we going?
Kirk: Where they went.
McCoy: Suppose they went nowhere?
Kirk: Then this will be your big chance to get away from it all.
- Star Trek: The Wrath of Khan

(Kirk and party commandeer a Klingon ship)
Admiral James T. Kirk: You! Help us or die!
Maltz: I do not deserve to live.
Admiral James T. Kirk: Fine. I’ll kill you later.
- Star Trek III: The Search for Spock

(After landing and cloaking a Klingon spaceship in Golden Gate Park)
Captain James T. Kirk: Everybody remember where we parked.
- Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home

Scotty: I know this ship like the back of my hand.
[Walks into a bulkhead.]
- Star Trek V: The Final Frontier

(General Chang is taunting the Enterprise by quoting Shakespeare)
General Chang: “I am constant as the northern star…”
Cmdr. Leonard “Bones” McCoy, M.D.: I’d give real money if he’d shut up.
- Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country

(Data finds a drink unpleasant - for the first time ever.)
Data: I hate this! It is revolting!
Guinan: More?
Data: Please!
- Star Trek: Generations

Dr. Zefram Cochrane: So you’re all astronauts on some sort of… star trek?
- Star Trek: First Contact

(Referring to his clean-shaven face.)
Riker: Smooth as an android’s bottom.
(Data later goes up to Riker, feels his cheek, then shakes his head “no”.)
- Star Trek: Insurrection

20

Can’t remember the characters’ names, but:

She: Can you hammer a 6" spike thru a board with your penis?
He: Not yet.
She: A girl’s got to have her standards…

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