An open letter to Fedex:
Let me start by saying I thought you were better than UPS (and that is not saying much).
You bastards. I have 3 problems with your service.
Where the hell do you get off taking my package with you when I am not home. LEAVE IT. It won’t get stolen. If I have to fill out a stupid form, fine I will. But why do you feel it is necessary to piss me off day after day by leaving your “calling card” on my door handle. Thanks for adding insult to injury.
Uhhhh why is it that you are delivering a package TO A RESIDENCE at 9:55 a.m.? Do you think I don’t work? Are you trying to avoid me? Here is a little tip: Most Americans between the ages of 18 and 65 are doing something during the hours of 7 to 6. It is called work. Use a little common sense and come back at 4 or 5. Gee, maybe then you could get someone at the door, dumbass.
Ummmm here is a biggie with me. If you are going to leave your damned “calling card” WRITE LEGIBLY. I CANNOT READ A CARBON THAT HAS BEEN MANGLED AND CROSSED THROUGH. It would really help me out if I could track the package on your website, but, noooooooo, you have to write like a 4 year old who just picked up his very first “safety pencil”. Thanks for nothing.
Finally what convenience do you think it is to me to come pick up my package (which you are supposed to deliver, that’s your job right?) in BUM FU** EGYPT!!! I don’t really want to drive 20 miles outside city limits to get something you were supposed to HAND to me.
You know I always thought the US Postal Service was all the things you hear people bitch about. But you know what? I never have had an issue with the USPS and packages (maybe I am lucky).
I feel much better now.