I go to a bodyworker (call her Helen) who has lots of female cancer patients as clients. She related this story told to her by one of those clients. IOW, this was told by the friend of a friend. I mean no disrespect to anyone’s religious or cultural practices. Just wondering about this situation, which happened at a major cancer center in the USA.
The cancer patient-- I’m going to call her Mary Lou-- was newly diagnosed with breast cancer, which is a very unsettling experience. Often you meet your surgeon first, have whatever surgery you’re going to have, and then meet your oncologist while you’re still getting used to having all or part of your breast(s) removed, still dealing with drainage tubes, and pretty much wishing you hadn’t ended up here. You might have chosen your oncologist, or might have been suggested/assigned, 'cause chances are, you don’t have the names of a bunch of oncologists in your proverbial Rolodex (dating myself).
A couple of weeks after her surgery, Mary Lou went to meet her oncologist. She waited in the examining room and in walks the doctor, a woman in full burqa. (See illustration– I believe we’re talking about picture #3 of 5.) Some of you may react by saying this couldn’t possibly have happened, and you might be right; I wasn’t there. But let’s proceed on the basis that it did happen.
Mary Lou told Helen later that she was very uncomfortable, not because of the full length garb, but because she couldn’t see the doctor’s face, including her eyes and mouth. Mary Lou didn’t feel she could communicate well or be sure she was being heard (not literally, of course, but heard.) It would be like only being able to talk to your oncologist on the phone.
Mary Lou was stumped, and so were Helen, and so was I when she told me the story. Hijab is one thing–no problem. Heck, many of us grew up communicating well with old-time nuns whose hair we never saw. But not to see your doctor’s eyes or mouth?? When you’re already terrified and vulnerable? Is Mary Lou’s (somewhat understandable) discomfort reason enough to find another doctor? She didn’t want to seem racist or xenophobic, and in truth, I don’t know what she actually did.
I don’t know any more of the details of this story, but I’m curious whether anyone else has had a similar experience.