Ok this is pretty good, and includes both the dog and the salami and it’s funny. A naked woman holding a salami and a poodle definitely had something go terribly wrong so the phrase “screwed the pooch” is especially appropriate. Still doesn’t quite explain why the bartender would automatically assume she wouldn’t be having a drink that night though, which would be key to making a truly wonderful punchline.
“Nakedly blonde walks into a bar, where poodle under one hand and two foot salami under other. She place poodle on the table. Bartender says: I presume you no need to drink. Naked lady says…”
… I guess we’ll be getting our perfect machine translations the same year a computer passes the Turing test and we all have flying cars. 
Do you waaaaaant to come back to my place, bouncy-bouncy.
I read this one, took me a moment to understand it. But it’s my favorite.
A naked blonde walks into a bar with a poodle under one arm and a two foot salami under the other. She lays the poodle on the table. Bartender says: I suppose you won’t be needing a drink. Naked lady says…“My boyfriend said he wanted to play hide the salami with me and a French bitch, and when I show up ready to go, he throws me out!”
“Don’t think, pour; anything cold & strong. And don’t ever date a ‘deli-man’. They’re all -ssholes.”
The machine’s Finnish is a darn sight better than mine, at that.
Naked lady says: What do you mean? And the bartender says: Well, by the looks of you, you’ve already had a Sexin’ the Pooch and a Dry Salami.
So sue me, I’m not that clever, I let Google finnish the joke for me.
Yes, I’ll have a drink. I was the designated driver the last time we went out.