Armageddon
Oil workers as astronauts? Perfect!
Black Hawk Down
Leave no man behind, unless.
Pearl Harbor
Worst love triangle plot ever.
Next: Movies starting with “A”
**Movies starting with “A” **
Airplane 2
Moderately funny, but not ZAZ
Abe Lincoln Vampire Hunter
Doomed statesman battles bloodsucking ghouls
Action Jackson
Craig admires Carl’s hard muscles
Next: Cheesey 80’s action movies
Cheesy 80’s action movies
Red Heat
Schwarzenegger with a Russian accent
Road House
Kick ass if nothing else
Beverly Hills Cop II
Inferior sequel, though kinda funny
Next: Pixar Movies
The Incredibles
Best superhero movie ever, methinks.
Ratatouille
Rats, French cuisine - sacre bleu!
Cars
Doc Hollywood on four wheels.
Next: Three more Pixar movies.
Three more Pixar movies
A Bug’s Life
The Seven Samurai with bugs.
Up!
Old guy gets talking dog.
Wall-E
The trash does pile up.
Next:
Movies about dancing.
Movies about dancing:
Dirty Dancing:
Baby won’t remain in corner.
Footloose:
Kids wanna dance; community disapproves.
Flashdance:
Welding, dancing, new fashion craze.
Next: Movies about travelling.
The Road to Morrocco
Bing, Bob and Dorothy Lamour
Vacation
National Lampoon theme park trip
Planes, Trains and Automobiles
Martin and Candy buddy picture
Next:
Saturday night Creature Features
Saturday night Creature Features
Creature From The Black Lagoon
Long, slow, dull monster movie.
Them
Giant ants are no picnic.
It
An intelligent carrot? Mind boggled.
Next:
Doris Day films.
Doris Day films:
Calamity Jane:
Day and Keel; musical western.
The Thrill Of It All:
Housewife becomes TV commercial star.
Where Were You When the Lights Went Out?
False accusations … or were they?
Next: Disaster movies.
The Perfect Storm
Need fish, oops, gigantic wave!
The Impossible
When tsunami come, bring pie!
Earthquake!
At 50, Ava Gardner’s hot!
Next: More disaster movies
The Towering Inferno
Skyscraper fires hard to extinguish.
The Poseidon Adventure
Flipped ship can be disorienting.
Airport
Have your barf bags ready!
Next: Supernatural horror movies.
Supernatural horror movies
Dracula
The Count gives terminal hickeys
Werewolf In A Girls’ Dormitory
Down, boy, down, boy, down
Ghost of Frankenstein
I thought he couldn’t die
Next: Mostly underwater movies
Mostly underwater movies:
The Deep:
Forgettable, except for Jacqueline Bisset.
Raise the Titanic:
You’ve better things to do.
20,000 Leagues Under the Sea:
Classic adventure, based on Verne.
Next: Movies involving computers.
Tron
A Light Bike? Me Want!
The Net
Identity thieves stalk Sandra Bullock
Wargames
Let’s Play: Global Thermonuclear War
Next: Movies involving robots.
Movies involving robots
Robot Monster
Gorilla in a diving helmet
Short Circuit
A waste of Ally Sheedy
Forbidden Planet
Robbie’s on Lost In Space
Next: Movies in caves
Movies in caves
Journey to the Center of the Earth
Snæfellsjökull holds Arne Saknussemm’s secret.
Nightwing
Killer bats plague New Mexico.
Dragonslayer
Mama Dragon’s babies eat princess.
Next:
Live action/animation mixes
Live action/animation mixes:
Mary Poppins:
Also called “Dances With Penguins.”
Who Framed Roger Rabbit:
Detective Valiant visits Toon Town.
Anchors Aweigh:
Gene Kelly, Jerry Mouse, dance.
Next: British movies.
British movies
Gorgo
Dinosaur gets caught, Mama comes
Henry V
Kenneth Brannagh kicks French ass
Shaun of the Dead
Veddy, veddy funny zombie flick
Next: Boris Karloff films
The Dumb Girl of Portici
His first film, in 1916.
Two Arabian Knights
One of eight in 1927.
The Boogie Man Will Get You
No funky dancing, I suspect.
Next: Biopics.
Biopics
Brian’s Song
A REAL man will cry
Funny Lady
Didn’t we see this before?
The Blind Side
Bullock is a HOT blond!!!
Next: Al Pacino films