Football Pool Douchebaggery

You stupid fucking chucklehead.

You’ve been a thorn in my side for the last, what, two? No, three seasons of the football pool I run. Always the one with the whiny complaints about how some minor, niggling aspect wasn’t fair (which was never actually the case), always quick to jump on a minor error that didn’t effect anything.

So now, when a major change to the entire structure of the league forces me to back off on a “sure, I’ll see what I can do”-level promise – a promise that had zero effect on you, the game, or how you play it, now you’re going to threaten to leave the league? This is the “deal breaker” for you?

Tell you what, dicksmack – blow your threats out your ass. Your entry fee has been sent back, and you can take a fucking hike. You’re exactly the type of jerk this pool doesn’t need.

Incidentally, thanks an extra bunch for deciding to pull this shit the day before the season starts. Damn good thing I had people on the waiting list just in case someone pulled a turd move like this.


Ahhh, that’s better…so, anyone care to blow off steam about any of the jerks in your football pool/FF league?

It’s amazing how some people turn from a guy you like having a beer with into monstro-asshole once money and pride are on the line.

What’s this about illegal sports gambling?

Guy who runs my football pool. Always dismissing anyone who complains about something as a whiner. What a jerk!

(just kidding)

I am pissed that people keeping drafting Davone Bess one spot before I can in the late rounds of fantasy drafts.

How can anyone complain about a football pool? They are completely straightforward (IME).

Some people just aren’t happy unless they are bitching about something. Hal, I agree, they did you a favor by starting early enough for you to give them the boot.

Hal’s is pretty novel!

Depending on where you live, football pools are totally legal so long as the organizer does not take a “cut” of the pool for himself.

Threadshitting is totally legal, of course, AND you even managed to do it in keeping with the title of the thread.

You don’t win anything for that, though.

I’m on the other end of this the comish of my fantasy football league screwed up our snake draft. Since the three top drafters threatened to quit if we redrafted and I didn’t want to quit even though I drafted last the whole way. He refused to make us redraft so I’m screwed. Of course two of the top drafters complained about there being a waiver system so that got dropped so I am out any advantages.

Yes, this is my last year playing with this group.

We have a guy who runs the squares… but somehow, for the last three years or so, his squares always have the 0’s, 1’s, 4’s, and 7’s. Never a 5 or 6. He wonders why nobody want’s to play this year.

We also have a ‘pick the winners of every game, with total points on Monday night tie-breaker’ pool - proud to say I’ve come out ahead every year, and, no, I don’t run that pool.

Lost it in Atlantic City, of course, for our fine friends at the IRS.

Wow, that sucks all over the place, Oredigger. No way at all to make everyone happy there.

Heh…I could make tic-tac-toe complicated. And thanks much, Stuffy, although I still must romp all over you come Week 10.

Sucks for him if, by some chance, he’s doing it honestly. We’re heading into the sixth season of this pool now – from 32 players each year, two make it to the Super Bowl. That means we’ve had 10 Super Bowl players, and five winners. I’ve made it to the dance twice, and won once. My wife made it once and won.

I know there has to some thought of “Yeah, that’s really run fair”, but the simple fact is that I have no opportunity to cheat. Ah well…I can’t help it if I’m just that damn good.

Or that the Titans decided to do everything in their power to ensure the Ravens advanced.

Not bitter, honest.

Dear Guy Who Bitches and Moans Every Time Someone Is Drafted:

And really - I mean every time. “Oh, I was hoping Adrian Peterson would fall to me at #10!” “Booo! Did you really have to take MJD next? He was the next on my board!” Just shut the fuck up, you goddamn dicknose. You’ve done this every year, and every year you get nothing but stone cold stares from everyone in the room. The reason players you want are being picked is because everyone in here did the same amount of research you did. By vocally expressing your desire for us to lay a golden turd in your lap on draft day that you can hold up as your trophy, you’re really saying every time we draft somebody we should, it honestly surprises you.

You are annoying.
You know no more about this than anyone else.
You need to shut up.

And oh yeah - you finished in the bottom half last year.

A bunch of us who grew up together had a league dissolve last year after nearly 20 years running because one guy went to law school and had to argue every goddamn thing.

The last straw was when he ended up in fourth place. He tried to claim the third place price because there was a tie for first. We (as normal human beings) decided that the prize for first and second would be combined and split by those two, and the third place prize would go to the next guy.

He argued that, technically by the numbers, he was in third place (despite the three guys ahead of him) and deserved the third place prize. So, the guys tied for first should split the first place prize, and the guy in third should get second prize and he gets third prize. First place, ending up with a smaller prize than second.

But, the RULES didn’t specifically address this. He managed to get two other guys on his side (one being the guy in third who figured he could claim a bit more prize money) so league dissolved because no one wanted to deal anymore.

Well if people wouldn’t have taken the next guy on his board…:wink:

I love our office pick 'em. Just for fun, but some people get really into it. Keeping on top of injuries, suspensions, whose playing well, which team is a good fit. And who wins EVERY GOD DAMN WEEK?

…the girl that chooses teams depending on the relative cuteness of their mascot. :smack:

My little brother completely and totally screwed up both the draft order and the league trophies. He based the draft order on regular season performance to give himself first draft pick this year, while basing the prize ranking order in such a way to keep himself out of last place last year–effectively giving himself all the bennies of losing while hanging me with the anti-prestige of our annual last place award. :rolleyes:

Meh, I’m’a stomp him this year as long as Warner’s hip holds together.

Yeah. Rules lawyering can pretty much screw up any recreational activity. Hope there’s a plan to reform the group without issuing an invite to the enema bag.

And his buddy…

“I got Adrian Peterson at #18! Suck it you guyz! He’s totally gonna kick ass, 'cause I got his QB, too, Jay Cutler. Hey, how did Ted also draft Adrian Peterson at #4?”

Don’t be bitching because you weren’t paying attention…

I don’t really follow football. I mean, I know all the rules and can appreciate a good game, but I don’t follow it week to week.

Without fail, every single person I know who participates in football pools, fantasy leagues and other such things is an immense drama magnet. The bitching and complaining, the trash-talking and the overmanagement of expectations concerning the rules all start weeks before the season. During the actual season, the random calls to talk trash and make mother jokes are constant distractions if I hang out with any of my buds who participate. And it doesn’t end with the Super Bowl. They get all worked up over what usually doesn’t amount to a whole lot of money and really exists for the sake of bragging rights.

And I wonder why they do it all. It adds to stress levels, particularly on Sundays when sane people ought to be relaxing and maybe watching the game for fun.