Freakin' Tropicana Smoothies

The BBQ Pit
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This morning I was thirsty and needed to break a $20, so I stopped at my Kwickee Mart and got what I thought was a healthy drink. It was a ‘mixed berry’ smoothie that pictured (only) blackberries, raspberries, and blueberries on the front.

After I drank about half of it, I glanced at the ingredients of my smoothie that pictured (only) blackberries, raspberries and blueberries on the label.

First up: water. No big surprise. Second, banana puree from concentrate. OK, they need to make it thick - it’s a smoothie. Third, white grape juice. Still not royally pissed - I figured they would have some ‘stretcher’ ingredients in there. Fourth, corn syrup. Huh.

Fifth, yogurt with gelatin in it (why? Just to make it non-vegetarian?). Sixth, insulin fiber. Seventh, whey protein isolate. Eighth, “fruitcal” (copyrighted) - it’s citric acid, malic acid and calcium hydroxid. Ninth, red grape juic concentrate.

Yes, we are to our tenth ingredient before we hit raspberry juice. At most ten percent of what I’m drinking is raspberry juice.

So what’s eleventh? Blackberries or blueberries? No, carmine.

That’s right - What I’ve been drinking has more INSECT in it than it does either blackberries or blueberries.

What the bloody hell? I knew I wasn’t getting just the pictured fruits mix-mastered into a thick drink, but damn! It’s got more bugs than it has the pictured ingredients!

I hate you, Tropicana. I hope there’s a level of hell where you have to eat pudding that has more worms than chocolate.

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So…how’d it* taste?*

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I’ve had it and thought it tasted pretty good. Tho the corn syrup makes it a bit too sticky sweet if you know what I mean.

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See, I had to break a $20 first thing this morning too, so I went straight for the little white donuts. Sounds like we had about an equal amount of health food ingredients.

(Oh, I washed 'em down with straight caffeine. No secret ingredients there. Water, coffee. Heh.)

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Somehow I’m not surprised they didn’t have a picture of this little lady on the bottle (From here).

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:eek:
Inulin fiber.

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And I’ll betcha there was no carmine in em either.

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Neat. Insects. I’m squicked. shudder

Insects in food is at least in the top ten things I refuse to think about while eating. Bleh.

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I grew up in West Lafayette, IN. Home of Purdue University. Home of the annual Bug Bowl each spring. In elementary school, we took field trips to the Bug Bowl. There, all of the entomologists and entomology students took much delight in telling us that little bug bits were in tons of everyday items that we don’t think twice about eating. That squicked me out at the time, but I guess it’s better than eating pesticides, eh? I’ve pretty much resigned myself to the fact that I eat little buggies every day.

Those Tropicana smoothies are gooooooooooooooood.

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Ever take a look at the calorie count on your healthy smoothies? Ouch.

Odwalla has some excellent products, but they’re still high in cals. You have to pay attention to that or any health benefits you think you’re getting are actually turning to sugar that’s going straight to your ass.

Carrot juice is where it’s at.

Sowwy.

11

I like the Bolthouse Farms smoothies. Green Goodness is yummy, and it’s dark green color grosses my wife out. Berry Boost is good too.

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What’s a carmine?

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Reddish coloring made from the husks of cochineal insects.

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B…b…but…but…It says *fruit *on it! Therefore, it’s good for you! 'Cuz, you know, fruit = good, right? Right?

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I like my insects whole.

Like in a Cricket Lick-It!

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Erm … wouldn’t people find it more preferable to eat something a little less red as opposed to something a little more insecty? I know I would.

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People don’t read ingredients, and apparently there’s still a few folks who don’t know what carmine is anyway. Hell, my dear old mum doesn’t even read the freakin’ nutrition facts on her food. It’s always entertaining to see her trying to claim something is health food when a quick glance at the label shows that it’s half sugar.

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I’d change that to ‘most folks don’t know what carmine is’. They don’t know what’s in confectioners glaze (used in Junior Mints and many other candies) either. Most people don’t know what’s in their cosmetics. They don’t know how shellac is made.

Re Gelatin

My WAG is that it was simply the cheapest way to achieve the consistency they wanted. If pectin or (that emulsifier they get from kelp, the name escapes me. The major fast food chains use it in their milkshakes) were cheaper, they would have used them instead.

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Carrageenan? Other common thickeners would include xanthan gum, cellulose gum, locust bean gum, or agar.

Gelatin is used in lots of cheap nonfat and lowfat yogurts to thicken the product. We were complusive yogurt-label readers when my husband was a vegetarian. I’m sure he didn’t know about carmine, though. As he’s been an omnivore for a couple of years now, I think I won’t tell him! :smiley:

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I know, those tricksters. :smiley:

If I’m going to imbibe 400 calories, I’m having some damn ice cream. Fuck a smoothie. :smiley: