From now on, I will ignore all emails that request anything be done "ASAP".

From now on if anyone sends me an email requesting anything ASAP, it will immediately fall to the bottom of my queue.

These self-righteous assholes seem to believe that their time is so much more valuable than mine that they insist that I drop whatever I’m doing to fix their stupid little problem. Hey jerkoff, everyone wants me to do their stuff first. That’s why I take care of things in the order in which they came in. It’s more fair that way. Not only that, but whether you believe it or not, I know exactly how critical your request is. Don’t try and exagerate it’s importance. That insults my intelligence, and I don’t like people who insult my intelligence (I know, what am I doing here then, right?).

his rant was brought to you by the idiot lady two floors down from me who sent me 10 emails in the span of 20 minutes before 8:00am demanding that I do something for her ASAP because she wanted to leave to go fishing at 11:30. The project she’s working on isn’t due until June 30. I hope she gets eaten by a sperm whale.

Pay no attention to this reply…ASAP!

Just send out an email to everyone saying that you’ve changed your email settings to shunt any email containing “ASAP” to the spam folder. At least they’ll have to come up with another way of putting it.

Man, that’s kind of a nasty thing to say.

Won’t somebody think of that poor sperm whale? :frowning:

Yeah yeah, it’s on my to-do list.

How do you feel about emails requesting someting ASAFP?

Dear Lord Ashtar:

I am having a difficult time understanding your complaint. My problem is definitely more urgent than anything else you’re working on, and I know better than you do how you can best prioritize your work. It seems like somebody has a case of the Mondays. Please advise ASAP.

Regards,

Your Dim-Witted Coworker

I always wanted to make Maple Syrup ASAP.

I have a co-worker that I believe has the red exclamation point as a default on her email settings because I 've NEVER gotten a message from her that did not include it. Some people seem to think the sky is always fallilng. So far it hasn’t. :o

I think you just need to point out to her that ASAP means ‘As Soon As Possible’ and that attending to her problems within her time frame may in fact not be possible. I don’t take the term ASAP to mean do it now but as a request, that while urgent to the person making the request probably not a priority for you. However ten emails in twenty minutes I would probably point out to her that it is no longer possible to attend to her problems as soon as possible because someone has wasted your time by deluging you with a torrent of time wasting emails**!**

So you’re bitching about people thinking they are the most important thing in the universe rather than the acronym? Cuz I can get behind either one.

Setting Priorities: I determine when I will do what. You are more than welcome to give me information on when you need something to assist me in setting priorities, but I will decide when I get to your project.

Giving Useful Information: Dammit, can’t you have the decency to tell me when you need something, and if it’s critical give me that information as well. ASAP? Well, I could probably do it right now, if I thought it was important enough. But if all you say is could you do this ASAP, I’m probably going to do it when I feel like it.

Courteous Behavior: I do it for you! Frex: Time sheets are due and must be entered by by 3:00 on Thursday. It’s monthly report time and I need your input by noon on Monday. I’m doing site updates and need information on the following sites by April 22.

People are assholes.

Hey Ashtar, looks like the object of your ire is a fellow Doper!

Exactly. Why do people seem to think that when someone asks them to do something ASAP that that person is asking them to drop what they’re doing and be at their beck and call. Granted, some people who issue the request for an ASAP are thinking that you’ll drop everything to do it, but that’s not what it means. I see it as a gentle request to fit this in as time permits. Possible might not be till June 29th, depending on your schedule.
As soon as you can, has a little less urgency to me, and is still not a request to drop what you’re doing, but may be a more polite way to request an urgent task be completed soon.
Your lack of planning ain’t my emergency and all that.

I think because it’s a capitalization, it rhymes with STAT, and overall just looks demanding, even though that’s not the meaning.

It’s like reading; I’m glad the sun is out! :mad:

Count me as one who takes the “possible” of part ASAP literally. Shit, I hope there isn’t someone seething because I occasionally put this in my emails. I don’t mean “I command you to do this right now mutha fucka”! I ussually use it after someone has made a mistake and they need to fix it as soon as possible.

??? Unless your refering to my play on AHoosierMama’s post I’m not getting it. :slight_smile: And what does “…>>>>>>>>>>>>>…^^^^^^^^” mean anyway. :cool:

But aren’t acronyms always in caps? Stat’ however is an abreviation though isn’t it?

Lord Ashtar, you could always inform you ‘friend’ that acronym finder also lists under ASAP either ‘As Slow As Possible’ and ‘As Soon As Practical’ and that you will be attending to her problem as slowly as is practical.

I believe he was highlighting your username because the OP is bitching that the person wanting something ASAP is doing so cuz she wants to go fishing. Hence the >>> until he got to your username, then the ^^ pointing up to it.

I say ASAP sometimes.

We are a department that is the hub of several different departments, and we can’t finish our work if we don’t have everything we need from the other departments.

So yes, I will say ASAP on occassion, and if it’s urgent, I will give you a firm deadline. If I don’t get the info I need when we need it, you run the risk of revenue loss.

But I don’t tell people ASAP because I have to go fishing. That’s stupid.

But do you realize that ASAP doesn’t really indicate urgency to many of us? It indicates you think you need it right now, but without clarifying info as to why, it just tells me want it as soon as possible, which may be next week as I’m swamped by someone else’s ASAP right now.

I edited my post, stretch, which may answer your question. If I really really need it, I will give a firm deadline, not an ambiguous ASAP.