So, I’m driving to work, minding my own business and this fucking fuck sideswipes me.
Minor damage (about $1,000), but it was on the highway, so I definitely had a case of “shit, you fucking fuck sideswiper, you, this COULD have been a lot worse.”
Now, it seems to me that Mr. Fucking Fuck was going to try to go on about his way like nothing happened, basically because he didn’t try to get over to the right until we tailed him close enough to get his licence fucking plate number. It made sense when we realized we were dealing with Mr. Budget Rent-a-Car.
I basically think he’s an FF because of aforementioned FF-dom and also the fact that he admittedly fell asleep after driving all night. He said this by way of excuse, but he still could have been groggy from his nap so I won’t get too mad that he thought we’d just say, well, geez, you poor thing…no wonder you almost killed us and some other innocent people!
Since I’m more happy to be alive and writing this than fucking mad, I’ll just end by sharing some things I learned:
I have recently been driving A LOT. As such, I’ve taken to snacking, etc., on the road. If this had been one of those instances where I was stuffing down a Croissanwich, I think it would have been a lot worse. I don’t think I’m being overly dramatic–we were both going about 65 and he almost lost control after we hit. I had both hands on the steering wheel and never left my lane. No more snacking for me.
Luckily, Mr. Cookie was with me so I got a hands-on accident lesson. The guy wanted to just exchange insurance because he “had patients waiting” but Mr. Cookie insisted we wait for the (fucking) fuzz to get an accident report. Good call – I would not have necessarily known that was a must do since this was my very first accident. Also, we called our insurance right from the scene and got a claim started so the adjuster has already called, etc.
If it makes you feel any better, I just remembered to thank you for something.
Around a month ago some guy was complaining about the lady at the post office asking him if he wanted to pay with his debit card, and you posted a response about that “fucking asshole” with his “nasty-ass weirdmobile” and how he "thinks it’s his god-given right to leave his shit at [your] house because he’s [your] “mailman”? Yes, that made me laugh harder than I have in months.
Thank you! Glad you’re ok; an accident at 65 is not something I’d enjoy!! :eek: :eek:
LauraLittlePony that’s really sweet of you. In turn, let me say to AuntieEm that for the first time reading the SDMB, I CRIED laughing over her “shit your pants” story. I tried to respond and tell her how much that made me laugh but I got a “website not responding” and didn’t re-post.
macabresoul just what I was wondering. Especially because
/Dave Barry
I swear I’m not making this up
/Dave Barry
he was wearing an apron under his shirt. It was in “unsecured” mode and was hanging down from his shirt. I dunno. Maybe he was going to be serving two patients over easy w/hash browns and toast.
Aww! Good deeds! Don’t forget, everyone, thank people for the laughs now; you never know when you might be offed by a guy wearing an apron under his shirt.
Wait a second–and apron UNDER his shirt??? Now that’s just bizarre. And somehow twisted. Eek!
Who the fuck does this fucking fuck think he is any fucking way? The first fucking rule of saving fucking lives is to do no further fucking harm. It’s abundantly fucking clear that he sure as fuck wasn’t fucking thinking about that. Fuck.
and what the fuck was with the fucking apron?
13! ha! beat that, fuckers! 14!
buttonfuckingjockey308, this isn’t a fucking contest. The use of the word “fuck” is fucking special and not to be fucking treated like it’s just some fucking word when you don’t have anything fucking better to say. A good fucking example would be that it would have been virtually fucking impossible for me to have written the last fucking sentence without using the word, “fuck”, but that’s only because you fucking used it. I don’t fucking have any “secret fucking agenda” where I fucking want to “one fucking up you” with the word, fuck.
Dollars to doughnuts he’s a homehealth aide. Oh wait this is the Pit.
Fucking dollars to fucking doughnuts he’s a fucking home-fucking-health aidefuck.
Hmmm. Maybe, … health-fucking… ass-aide. No maybe… head-up-his-fucking… ass… aide. You know it’s really hard to use the word health and fuck in a sentence. No that’s not true either… A fuck frequently is healthy (subject/predicate, check). See that fucking works. Fucking… health…, health… fucking…Fuck it.
Well fuck, I was all ready to fucking enter! Now I’ll just go about my fucking business as usual, cause when it comes to fucking, I’m a fucking maniac.
Glad nobody was hurt in the accident, I’d hate to read about any mayhem. At least there was a doctor on the scene.
I have been forced to erase the “f” word from my vocabulary due to parenthood.
However, in honor of this horrible incident, I will quote a SDMB poster, whose identity I cannot recall:
14!
