I’m good at this- I was a musician for a long time and had to learn how to schmooze. Eye contact says “I’m accepting you, not shutting you out. I’m sympathetic, I acknowledge you, be a part of the group.” I was a dorky kid, I had to learn all of this as a skill. You’re unusually smart, Frylock, so I bet you could do it too.
Don’t go for tricks like looking at their eyebrows. Look 'em right in the eye. I try to ‘read’ people in this way and play off what I see. More generally it is about your demeanor. What effects can you project? Creepy, angry, smart, dumb- all kinds of things. Try to work out what actions create what effects and then try to do it on purpose. Watch actors- they are especially good at acting comfortable and cool in interviews and what-have-you. They are in make up and wardrobe though- most of them aren’t better looking or smarter than us, they just know what they are doing and go for it.
You know who is really good at this? Melissa Lee. Don’t you just want to buy her coffee and listen to her tell you about hedges, derivatives, buybacks, dividends and the rest? Yeah, there is a reason she got that job. So try to imitate her, or find some other ‘eye contact and demeanor guru’ to try to imitate. Yup, it is kind of acting, but it isn’t lying because body language doesn’t usually have content in a way that can be construed as true/false, so don’t worry about it. It is just socially trying to create an image, a vibe, to make people comfortable. A little eye contact is part of that.
Accept her blessings.
