Funniest moments in video games

In Postal 2, I got a chuckle out of some of Postal Dude’s comments.

(After blowing someone away)
“Funny thing is, I don’t even like video games.”

(When the police arrest him)
“Hey, don’t blame me, arrest the kid with the keyboard.”
Also, after a recent discussion in MPSIMS, I downloaded “JFK Reloaded” where the object is to try to repeat Oswald’s marksmanship. The AI does some amusing things sometimes.

You know the Secret Service agent who jumped onto the back of the limo? In some circumstances, the limo takes off while he’s still running to catch up. He usually then gets run over by the Vice President’s car.

I’ve also managed to get some odd results by shotting the driver and sending the limo careening out of control.

I also find it funny that the ballistics report makes a special note of when you knock Jackie’s hat off.

Hehe…“Me not that kind of orc!”

Remember that moment called Monkey Island?? Yeah, that was a hoot.

Clearly nobody here has played House of the Dead 2 for Dreamast, the most unintentionally hilarious video game in history.

Not exactly a video game moment, but still hilarious:

WETA Digital, the masterminds behind the CGI effects for the Lord of the Rings trilogy, were working on the battle scenes for The Two Towers–in particular, Helm’s Deep. They used a computer program called Massive, which simplifies big battle scenes hugely by putting each character on a side (the orcs or the defenders) and then having them fight accordingly instead of having to go through each character and program their responses individually.

The first time they tested this program out, the story goes, the orcs attacked–and all the defenders of Helm’s Deep ran away.

The story Kythereia mentioned always reminds me of a story Peter Molyneux told about developing Black and White. They were programming a creature to seek out food. For some reason, it kept trying to grab its own leg. Apparently, when they programmed it to seek out the closest thing that was edible, they forgot to “tell” it that it couldn’t eat itself.

I start giggling every time the three Trowe come out to sing in The Bard’s Tale. I thought the cow-tipping action in that game was a funny touch, too.

Return to Castle Wolfenstein is full of Nazi jokes, which I love very much.

Outside a rocket-base hangar that has obviously been only marginally successful in its attempts to contain a very large explosion: “Effective immediately, personell are prohibited from brewing coffee in the Mark III Fuel Distiller. As we saw from last week’s incident, even very slight impurities can have disastrous consequences.”

If you sneak up on two Nazi guards who have been playing with dynamite: “Now, cut the red wire. Or is it the green wire? Let me go check the manual.”
“Red, green, they all look grey to me anyways…” FOOM

in Bushido Blade, I always got a kick out of it when my opponent and i would both run up to each other, both stab, and both fall down dead.

“now now… perfectly symmetrical violence will get us nowhere.”

Don’t remember the level, but in the Mac version of Dark Forces, if you went close enough to one of the walls in some Empire stronghold, there was the clearly readable graffito, “Ewoks suck.”

I dug it.

Not to metion just about all of Destroy All Humans. That game is so wrong it’s hilarious.

In Arcanum, one of the character options is Idiot Savant. The character is actually quite intelligent, but has been locked in a home for mental defectives until quite recently. The dialog options are limited to dumb. The main NPC believes that the character is the reincarnation of a saintly elf…and cannot believe that Fate would play such a cruel joke on him. Lots of fun, but this is a character to be played on the third or fourth game, not a good choice for the first game or two.

Man, this is going back a bit, but when I used to get stuck somewhere in Zork, I’d often type in random crap while trying to think of the solution. I’d be amused at some of the comments the computer would return to my weird commands:

Very good. Now you can go to the second grade.


>Kiss me
I’d sooner kiss a pig.

>Kill me
All right, since you asked…
You are now dead

Tales of Phantasia was part of the same series, IIRC. The game was so hilariously translated and so faithful to its not-quite-PG themes that it made me laugh repeatedly. I mean, watching an RPG sprite have a wet dream in front of her two RPG sprite companions is a little risqué…

Eh, DeJap took some creative liberties with the scenes on the ship from Venezzia to Alvanista. Arche was actually just snoring in the original… but, I guess it’s funnier that way. I rather prefer the official translation on the GBA version (the writing is much tighter), though I think the sprites and graphics are better looking on the SNES one. Oh well. The SNES one doesn’t have the awkward lag during battles, either.

On topic, Super Mario RPG was pretty funny. Bowser made excellent comic relief. The NPC’s had some amusing lines, too.

In one level of Freedom Force, if you get close enough to a couple of thugs without immediately alerting them, you can overhear their Brooklyn-accented conversation…on particle physics. Towards the end of the spiel, one of 'em will alert the other “Cripes, it’s dem heroes! Get in character!”

And playing the Deus Ex demo, once, after discovering I could pick up (and drop) the dead bodies on the map, a picked up a dead UN trooper, hauled him into the front office of the UN bunker on that level, and dropped him on the desk of the trooper/receptionist. Said receptionist, who before and since has only seemed to have a few pre-scripted voice clips (like “They’re waiting for you in the Command Center…I’ll buzz you through.” or “Way to go, sir!”), looks at me over the corpse, and says in a completely disdained voice, "Is that supposed to be funny?"

Like I said, 'never able to repeat that one. And I tried. Oh, how I’ve tried.

Back in the day, I had a magazine cover demp disc for the Amiga which had a demo of a game called Rainbow Islands on it. It was a fairly mediochre climb and gather game, played by these big eyed adorably cute characters. But if you left it sitting too long without a mouse move or click, one of those adorably cute characters took out an oversized handgun and began playing Russina routlette with it!

Syndicate used to be great fun if you took a flame thrower to a dog (“I burning your dog!”) and *UFO:Enemy Unknown * had these urban combat scenarios where you’d have to jet into a city to surgically remove an alien infestation, only you’d take as much ordinance as you could jam on the plane and raze the freakin’ city around you! Collateral Damage! Woot!


“Terrible shot” as it goes in. NBA Jam

There was that Gex game for PS1, where nearly every three seconds Gex would shout out random phrases. “My inner child is comming out, and it hurts!”

The female Goomba that first joins Mario in Paper Mario 1,000 year door, jokes on “common” videogame and Super Mario lore. “Umm thats a goomba, just like I am, in case you havent noticed”

Bart, in “The Simpsons Hit and Run” gives his comments “X button is accelerate, Y button is brake… you know, just like every other racing game you’ve ever played”. *Im using X and Y as varibles here, and not as actual keys.

It would appear that MOST jokes come from video games that poke fun at the “big name” video game characters, as they have something else to poke.

I would also suggest that the Zelda franchise has its fair share of jokes.
I guess “All your base are belong to us” has been retired… right?

You can also “hop” in much the same way. Also, if you type “zork” he will respond.

Just remembered. The “Radio” programming from the Grand Theft Auto series is great too.
“In a world where people live in a computer…”“Do you love me? Yes or No? 1 or 0 ?”" … will you be able to live in
The Mainframe

There is a button to change the radio station in all of the cars.

In Lego Starwars. If you use the “force” on the chairs in the board room in the first level, the Cantina music will play, and the chairs will dance.