Funny roommate quirks

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

The other day I observed the state of the toilet and decided that I should clean it. Well, I looked around the bathroom for the toilet brush I put in there about a week beforehand and it was nowhere to be found. Puzzled, I later enquire about its state to my roommate.

He moved it to the third floor kitchen with the rest of cleaning supplies that he has in some “cleaning bucket”. Handy, I supposed, for cleaning on the third floor. It troubled me, though, that no toilet existed on the third floor, and hence no need for a toilet brush.

Well, nonplussed with that answer, I saunter to the third floor, grab that brush, and return it to the bathroom on the first floor.

A few days later I notice it missing again while my roommate and his girlfriend (who also resides there) were cleaning this bathroom. I ask about the repeated disappearance of this most holy of cleaning products. As it turns out, he feels that a toilet brush in plain sight detracts from the appearance of the bathroom.

“But,” I protest, “it’s a toilet brush. Where better for it than next to a toilet?” Again the charge of ruining the decor. “It’s a bathroom!” The conversation turns to commentaries on how the bathroom is the most important room in the house and so on, to which I agree, but then point out that there is a toilet in plain view, and so also a toilet brush, perhaps as an assurance to visitors of ready cleanliness (though I admittedly came up with this ad hoc, I had never considered that in a room with towels, washcloths, soap, and toothbrushes [that is, cleaning products and accessories] that a toilet brush was somehow profane).

Then the conversation devolves into theoretical considerations on the cleanliness levels of a toilet versus a toilet brush (the brush, I claim, is cleaner, else it couldn’t actually clean anything). This, however, went nowhere.

Eventually I capitulated on the stipulation that we keep a seperate “cleaning bucket” downstairs. Still, though… dumbfounded.

2

My current roommate goes wild whenever people show up at the house and licks himself constantly.

3

Yours too, Gorgon? I bet he doesn’t even wear clothes, either.

4

Actually, get enough alcohol in my former roommate, and he didn’t wear clothes. I can recall many nights when I would have to shout over the incredibly loud Fleetwood Mac that he liked to drink to, “Dammit, Ricky, put on some f*cking clothes! And watch where you’re pointing that thing!”

Ah, those were the days.

-Dirty

5

Ahhh the exact reason I now live in a one bedroom place. My roomie was a good guy but had some intresting ideas about keeping the place clean. If he made the mess it was ok to leave it be but if I made the mess it had to be cleaned, right then and there. I belive his girlfriend at the time had a lot to do with this…

We finally came to an arrangment of I clean my messes and he cleans his…

I’ll save the stories of the great garbage war for another day… it’s amazing why two guys will do to not take out the trash.:eek:

6

rofl… I’ve just come to the conclusion that some people are more worried about a room’s appearance and some are more worried about ease of use and practicality. I am one of the latter. When Mr. Athena and I first moved in together, we had the great toilet paper war. At the time, we lived in a house where the master bathroom had a separate little closet thingy for the toilet. The sinks, shower, etc. were in the main bathroom, then there was the closet with the toilet. There was literally NO room in the toilet room - it was a toilet, enough room to sit down and close the door, and that was it. No room for a tasteful basket or cupboard or anything.

In the 2 years that I lived in the house prior to Mr. Athena moving in, I’d just stored toilet paper sort of behind and to the side of the toilet. I could tuck a package in right there, it was handy when needed, and you never had to worry about the dreaded empty roll. Mr. Athena, on the other hand, did NOT like the toilet paper thrown willy-nilly into the toilet room. He didn’t like how it looked. I had the same arguements you had, erislover. It’s not even a BATHROOM, for God’s sake! It’s a closet with a toilet in it! Who CARES if you see the toilet paper!

Well, he did. We argued over it for months. I think we ended up storing the toilet paper in the linen closet, but slowly and surely extra rolls made their way back into the bathroom.

:boggle:

7

Maybe you should pick up one of these.

8

Ah, Rubbermaid; the rubber of the Gods. :slight_smile:

9

If rubbermaid and playskool joined forces and made cars, I’d buy them. They’d be well thought out, impossible to destroy, and available in many colors.

My roommate gets phonecalls, junkmail regarding his “credit card debt consolidation” but he has no SS#, job, or even pants. He just hangs out all day, eating my food, drinking my water, he never takes phone messages, and always walks around naked. All he does is sleep, eat, craps and pisses in a box in his room, and licks himself.

10

My old college dorm roommate used to fall asleep at night while listening to music through headphones. The thing is, he would have the volume up so loud that it kept ME awake. And I’m a heavy sleeper! But I would have to get up after he started snoring and turn off his stereo so that I could get some sleep.

11

I’ve known people who talked in their sleep occasionally, but I once had a roommate who would yell in his sleep. Sometimes they would be coherent, and sometimes not. I began keeping a list of some of his most interesting outbursts:

Hey! That’s MY Stairmaster!
Holy shit! Incoming bitches!
I had five cats, but three are missing! (He never had any cats)
*Yeah?! Well I can bench SIX tons of cantelopes!
Aw, man! I have an asshole on my face!
Hey, Keanu, could you lend me ten bucks?
*

Occasionally he would make airplane noises followed by a big explosion sound.

12

My room mate likes to sleep in the crevice between the wall and her bed - whilst burning incense and listening to Gary Puckett (though she is a rap person)

13

In second year of university, I had three roommates ( in a four bedroom apartment). One came home one day to find the apartment door unlocked and no one else seemed to be home. This annoyed her – not that we’re in a dangerous neighbourhood, but c’mon we all have computers and such and would all be screwed if our stuff was stolen.

To be sure her anger was justified, she went from room to room, to make sure that indeed no one was home. All rooms were empty. She went to her own room to study. Her room is on the first floor, below the Quirky Roommate’s. She could hear movement upstairs… odd…

Went to doublecheck – nope, no one else was in the apartment. Or so it seemed…

The Quirky Roommate had been hiding in her closet.

We don’t know why. She just did that sometimes.

We were afraid of her.

14

Every once in a while, my roommate would get extremely enthusiastic describing the brilliance of the cartoon Pinky and the Brain. Later, I learned that was related to his smoking crack. One day his supplier came by, explained how he had ripped off is supplier and was feeling a little paranoid, and showed off the little semiautomatic pistol he was now carrying in case the guy came after him.

That was my last month in that apartment, and that was the last roommate I ever had.

15

Maybe it’s just the Guinness, but these have me cracking up!

One of my old roommates insisted on throwing snotty Kleenex in the paper recycling, then acting offended when I pointed out that it wasn’t recyclable.

Another, who was always lamenting and apologizing that the bulk of the housework inevitably fell on my shoulders, left a pile of holes from the paper punch on the living room floor for about a week before getting off her ass to vacuum them up.

I’m so glad that my current roommate problems are limited to staring at me when I’m eating, trying to walk on the ajkhp-ae4oi8vnk;awe keyboard, and shedding constantly.

16

Okay, don’t surprise me like that. I could choke to death laughing so hard.

I had three roommates-from-hell. It was my bad luck to have them all simultaneously.

First there was the Klepto. He stole stuff from me, as his name suggests. He also worked on a potato farm, and would come home afterwards with his boots caked with sod, and tromp all around the apartment. Oh yeah, and he liked to date underage girls.

Then there was the Chef. On one memorable occasion my then-girlfriend and I were forced to go out to eat, because he was in the process of cooking a meal for himself, using all four stove burners and the microwave. He also liked to watch standup comedy a lot, and whenever the comedians said anything even remotely funny, he’d shriek with laughter.

Lastly there was the Hermit. If he was alone in the apartment he would behave fairly normally, as far as I could deduce. As soon as I got home, though, he’d hightail it for his bedroom, close the door, and smoke dope until everyone went away.

I am so glad I’m not a starving college student anymore.

17

Can you blame him? Or maybe you’re just jealous you didn’t think of it first? :smiley:

18

Athena, of course the toilet paper is stored near the infamous cleaning bucket… :rolleyes:

That’s a good way of putting it, though. Utility. Not that I don’t appreciate a nicely decorated room, but bathrooms? I mean, we all know what we do in there, right? IMO, hiding the toilet brush is like hiding laundry detergent.

It also struck me that another thing I liked to have close by the toilet was a plunger. Of course that would score low on the appearance-meter, but if he ever clogs that toilet, what is he going to do, run up three flights of (circular) stairs with his pants around his ankles? :smiley:

Admittedly he is a great roomate otherwise.

19

Mr. Athena had a conversation with me about laundry detergent as well. Our laundry room has a set of built-in cabinets to the right of the washer and dryer. They’re next to the dryer, which in turn is next to the washer. It’s the logical place to put the laundry detergent.

Mr. Athena, however, was concerned about keeping it there because of the distance between the washer and the cabinet. It’s not that far - a step or two at most. But he was sure that laundry detergent was going to be leaked all over as we took it from the cabinet to the washer.

So far, he has yet to come up with a better place to put it, even though I suggested just leavin’ the damn box on top of the washer.

On a related note, it’s rather ironic that he worries about laundry type stuff. He’s always doing laundry and leaving it in the laundry room, either in the dryer or, more often, on top of the washer and dryer. This isn’t a big deal to me because I don’t give a shit, but considering that he’s so neat and tidy otherwise I sometimes wonder why there’s such a disconnect on the laundry issue. In our current house, the laundry is in the basement, so nobody sees it. Our last house, however, the laundry area was right off of the living room in the entry from the garage. It was right there, for anyone to see. Somehow, it was OK to leave laundry there for weeks at a time, but visible TP in the bathroom was a big no-no.