“GRETTA CHAMBERS IS A LOVELY LADY BUT BERNIE SHAPIRO IS A FINK.”
The parties named were university officials. I loved this for some reason.
In one of the arts buildings on my former campus (at the time, the toidies there had your standard, normal size roll of toilet paper on a spool, not the giant, super rolls you see today) right above the toilet paper roll was written:
“Sociology degrees: Please take one.”
As you approach light pee, your ass becomes infinite.
Just this weekend (yesterday, in fact)…in the men’s room of a local bookstore:
“Balrogs are in Woodbridge”
If that’s not ominous I don’t know what is.
Once seen in a bathroom at UNC:
“Virginity is like a balloon in the parade of life… One prick and it’s gone!”
One I saw in Oklahoma:
“Here I sit
bowels a-flexin’
giving birth
to another Texan”
In the building at the University of Missouri that housed the philosophy department, there was a bathroom where the most amazing scrawled discussions would take place on the walls. Nobody ever posted anything crude that I can recall. I had an astronomy class in the same building and I used to go out of my way to use that bathroom.
In the women’s stalls in one of the Concordia University (here in monteal Canada) there were long debates and wisdome words about being one self.
In one stall however, i liked what was written.
It was a female student ( too ashamed to go to a councellor or call women’s help line) asking for advice about her very abusive fiance.
She got a lot of advice, encouragements and words to let her know she’s not alone.
They paint the walls
To silence my pen
But the shithouse poet
Strikes again
Flush twice, it’s a long way to the cafeteria
2 + 2 = 5 for large values of 2
As you proceed north on the beltway in DC you come to a spot in the road where the Mormon Temple is plainly in view as you go under an overpass. Written on the overpass is:
Surrender Dorothy
When the British Library was still in the British Museum, one of the rather antiquated stalls in the men’s room had the following:
“Karl Marx wrote Das Kapital here.”
“What, in the loo?”
Written on a side wall near the back, only read while sitting down:
If you can read this, you’re pissing on your shoes
I saw…
If it’s yellow, let it mellow
If it’s brown, flush it down
I also saw
We don’t swim in your toilet please don’t pee in our pool
In the Northwestern U. music building:
"Why can’t Northwestern voice majors have colostomies?
They can’t find shoes to match the bag."
sorry for the semi-bump; these nostalgia threads tempt me every time, and I’ve finally caved in. I think I’m still within official bumping guidelines…I hope…
Free the Bricks
on the side of the UNT library during the mid-late 80s
These things are called latrinalia, just so you know. 
F_X
I think I saw the first draft:
Here I shit,
All broken-farted,
You think this will rhyme,
But it just isn’t going to fucking happen.
Anyone can piss on the floor, be a man and shit on the ceiling.
unclviny
I think the original version of this:
**"Here I sit all brokenhearted
Tried to shit but only farted
Then one day I took a chance
and tried to fart but shit my pants"**
is quite old. I think it goes like this:
"Here I sit brokenhearted
Paid a dime and only farted"
I s’pose it hails from the days of pay-toilets. Funny, regardless.
In a women’s room some time ago:
“All men are assholes, and if you forget, they’ll remind you.”
I had to rush to use the bathroom right after class last week. The only urinal in the nearest bathroom was squished between two panels which were probably only about two and a half to three feet apart. I shimmied up with my backpack on and started doing my business. Looking up, I noticed some writing which someone had attempted to paint over, but didn’t quite get it completely.
I’d like to see a fat person use this.
(Please note, this isn’t intended as a deragatory statement against obese people on my part, I just found it humorous that someone would make the urinal like that, and then someone else would scrawl the remark on the wall.)