Gary Condit - I don't know if you're a murderer, but I do know you're a moron

From FOXnews.com:

I’ll assume that there is some level of truth to the above, that it’s not all a series of damnable lies and injustices perpetrated by a variety of different, unrelated people, against the distinguished gentleman from California.

Uh, Gary? Didn’t you get the memo? The bipartisan, political trim-fest is over in D.C.

I know, I know. It isn’t fair that Jack Kennedy used to be able to sweep stuff off his Oval Office desk and fuck Marilyn Monroe silly. Them’s the breaks, though.

Now me personally, I don’t much like adultery in any circumstance. Without getting into the morality and character issues, it’s just kinda tacky, if you ask me.

But it takes a remarkable level of arrogant idiocy to be fucking around with multiple women when you work at a job where:

A. - Your career is badly damaged, if not over, if you get caught.

B. - The press, if it smells a story, can stick about 1,000 microscopes up your ass.

And, sir, before you implore the people to judge you on your record … sorry. Your job is all about people making judgements about you. You can do your sales pitch, but they ultimately get to decide what’s important to them. They might vote against you for your hairstyle.

And a lot of those people think its indicative of your character or lack thereof if you fuck around on your wife. You know this. You apparently didn’t care. Now the piper’s got his hand out.

Whatever happened to finding one woman who likes sex a lot, and then commencing to a long-term relationship in which said sex is a frequent but exclusive occurrence? Am I missing out on some enlightened revolution?

However you feel about the morality of adultery, you have to agree that a politician doing it is pretty dumb. Doesn’t seem to stop the power-drunk, horny old bastards though, does it?

I thought the best part was Smith saying that Condit asked her to sign a form denying that they had an affair.

Condit’s “denial”: “I have not asked anyone to refrain from discussing this matter with authorities, nor have I suggested anyone mislead the authorities.”

It turns out that one of Condit’s lawyers has acknowledged that the form was sent to Smith, but that she wasn’t urged to sign it.

An absolutely classic non-denial denial from Condit. What a sleazebag.

FWIW, I’ve heard that Condit demanded a confession from Clinton during the Lewinsky ordeal. Bastard.

  • Rob

Good line. :slight_smile:

If you happen to have one of those laying around that you’re not interested in, would you mind sending her my way? Thanks.

Not to justify Condit’s adultery, but most of this country would not approve of that kind of woman being married to a politician. For some reason, many citizens (even Californians) feel better knowing that their elected representative is married to a woman who looks like she couldn’t suck a cherry off of a half-melted Carvel sundae.

So that means if you want to get elected, you will most likely need to marry a woman who isn’t a firecracker in the sack. Less Angelina Jolie and more tri-county rhubarb queen. The kind of woman who thinks that the more lace a nightgown has, the sexier it is.

This just makes adultery more tempting. When we as a nation are not afraid to elect a guy who has a “special lady” who wears halter tops and zebra-print cowboy hats to political functions, the fidelity of our politicals will improve.

It’s such a weird world. I remember during the GOP Convention, they were proudly saying how Dick Cheney (IIRC) married his high school sweetheart. Outside of the political arena, who the hell would actually brag about that?

I don’t know anything about anything, really…but I do know that I like to say.

VINCE FLAMMINI

FLAMMINI
FLAMMINI

VINCE “TWO FISTS” FLAMMINI

jbj - I know. Doesn’t Vince “Flamin’” Flammini sound like a bit character that gets killed off in his first episode of “The Sopranos?”

**
OK, that made me laugh out loud, AG.

Hey, don’t judge a book by its cover! Who knows what a freak Laura Bush might be in the bedroom. You know what they say about librarians …

[sub]You don’t know? Oh. Me either. I was hoping you did.[/sub]

Damnit! That’s exactly what I was thinking about the OP too!

I want to change my name to Vince Flammini. I want to Flamminiize myself. I want to get all Flamminiish. I want to revel in Flamminitude, Flamminiousness and Flamminiocity.

I’m with ya … FLAMMINI - FLAMMINI - FLAMMINI!!

I am a librarian and I am married to a librarian and let me tell you that whatever you may have heard isn’t the half of it.

Let me just say that you haven’t lived until you’ve seen a room of librarians in leathers.

Librarians, a professions of freaks and geeks (often within the same person).

If I were prone to opinions I’d think he was actually innocent of any murder, but could he have painted “SUSPECT ME” in larger letters on his chest?

On his chest? Now, come on. I suspect he’s got the most brilliantly colored bullseye tattooed directly on his ass. This knuckle-head is either in as deep a state of denial (or worse) than Slick Willie ever touched, or he’s the worst “teller-of-the-truth” ever. There’ve been no press releases that really deny anything (yet), can’t wait to see how this ends up.

Have you people SEEN this Vince Flamini?? He LOOKS like a gangster from the Sopranos! It’s the funniest damn thing I’ve seen, CNN ran this interview where he’s leaning against his car and looks like a real rough character. I recommend it strongly :smiley:

— G. Raven

While this is no surprise, it is an interesting development:

Condit Changes His Story

You mean (gasp) that they actually were (Oh my God!) having an affair?!? What a shock! Wow, color me totally surprised…NOT!

Sure I do.

  1. They know what binding really is.

  2. They always get beneath the hardcover, to the soft pulp beneath.

  3. They’re handy with a pot of glue and a brush.

  4. They never have paper cuts.

  5. They are afraid of the Library Pleethman. :wink:

  6. They may whisper, but they speak volumes.

  7. They know what goes on between the sheets.

  8. Nobody ever pulls the vellum over THEIR eyes.

  9. They know enough to order copies of “Stuart Little” bathed in malt and barley, to draw the mice.

  10. They know the difference between stacked and stacks. And, if you hold a valid card, they’ll be happy to show you too. :smiley:

Cartooniverse

Loverboy: [sub]just writing that really creeped me out[/sub]

Actually, Headline News reported that Condit was one of the people urging Pres. Clinton to be candid and forthright; that concealment and evasion would only hurt him.

Otherwise, he was a Clinton supporter.

Or, to quote from Sally Quinn’s column on Sunday’s Washington Post Web site:

"Remember, in the middle of the Monica scandal, you were one of the few Democrats on the Hill to warn Clinton that “the drip, drip, drip” of new and constant media revelations would be extremely hurtful to him.

Hey, Gary, shouldn’t you be listening to your own advice?"

Time for VINCE FLAMMINI to crack some skulls down in washington*

*[sub]this post paid for by citizens for a powerful flammini[/sub]

I am the anti-rational. I’m the voice of unreasonableness. I am suspicious. Full of conspiracy theories and jumps to conclusions.

When Chandra shows up, unharmed and says she just flew to Liberia for awhile to get away from it all, then I’ll change my tune. When they find a second “boyfriend” and he confesses to the murder AND there is sufficient DNA evidence to convince me, then I’ll recant my accusations.

But until then, let’s think of our good friend Occam, shall we? We all knew from the beginning that Condit was a liar, no? I mean, a powerful politician would really have ZERO interest in a 24-year-old woman other than sexual. “Friends” my ass. So now he’s admitted he lied about that, and we can slap the liar label on him and move on from there.

When a woman dies or disappears, who is the most likely person to be at the crux of it? Well, it’s someone she knows, of course. In this case, a politician with a lot to lose if people find out, who also happens to be a LIAR. And a cheating bastard, of course.

So here’s my conspiracy theory. Chandra wanted more, perhaps. Maybe she was pregnant and refused to terminate the pregnancy. Maybe she started to pressure him to lose his wife. So, he disappeared her. That is the easiest, simplest, most commonly occurring explanation.

He’s already backsliding. I see a progression from here.

#1: I didn’t have sexual relations with that girl. We were FRIENDS.
#2: Okay, we had a sexual/romantic relationship. But I don’t know where she is now.
#3: “Chandra came to me upset about something…said she was going away/frightened/someone was trying to hurt her.”
#4: But I didn’t know she was pregnant.
#5: Okay, I knew she was pregnant, but it wasn’t mine.
#6: Okay, it was mine.

And so on. Until he has to let it slide that he was involved in her disappearance. I can almost guarantee this type of scenario will play out.

-L