Complete hyperbole. If GP had asked, “Did you get a boob job or did you lose weight?” I think it would have been entirely appropriate and may have given more insight than the OPs “I did something but I won’t say what.” nebula.
But the way GP said it was moddable* (I would say note instead of warning but whatevs) just like if he had said “I bet ya lost an asston of weight.”
I personally think it was in bad taste but not personal enough to fall into the “Don’t be a jerk” category but it is still moddable under the rules of the board.
To put it into context, The wind of my soul did get more specific about her changes. She lifted weights, lost ten pounds, and gained muscle tone. So, the boob joke was not only jerkish, it was irrelevant. Definitely a good moderation call.
Well, you’re all man’splainin’ for each other, so I’m not going to give any weight to AK84’s post or your explanation of it. Other than to say I completely disagree with both of you and I’m unconvinced by anything either of you says.
So, how jerkish the comment was and how good the moderation was can be decided based on what’s written after the warning was given? It was an irrelevant joke at the time it was made because later the OP made it obvious there was no boob job?
Man’splainin’? I find that highly sexist and offensive!
My explanation of it was done because you misunderstood what he wrote. There was no man’splainin’.
It seems easier to me to just not be a jerk about women’s bodies. If you need some threads to be marked as “woman safe,” what does that say about all the other threads?
It’s not just that he’s apologizing, but he’s apologizing and not trying to get the Warning rescinded. That heavily suggests he accepts that the level of moderation was appropriate.
The only reason a “forum for women” in this context would be necessary is if you were advocating that people should be able to be hostile towards women in the rest of the forums. Just like you don’t need a “bully-free” forum unless you allow bullying in every other forum.
And, yes, I know you weren’t actually suggesting a women’s forum, but making a point. But that point was that we shouldn’t care about these people’s discomfort. Despite them caring so much they got a special rule about it.
This forum isn’t a democracy. How rare is it that something is so bad that the mods make a new rule?
When people do something all the time, it often takes a strong deterrence to make sure people don’t do it again. So the mods said they’d start handing out Warnings. Which means that, if someone does violate the rule, they have to follow through–even if you think this particular case wasn’t as bad as what happened before.
I think the thing that sticks out the most to me when these threads pop up is why are some men so invested in being able to joke about women’s breasts and/or genitals. Really? It’s so important to you that you be able to mock women with impunity and you’re going to fight for your rights by golly.
It just strikes me that someone like that would have a pretty pathetic existence.
I started this thread, and you did just plainly insult me. I’m sure you won’t get a warning for it. Consider that in comparison to what so many think was highly offensive and well deserving of a warning.
Why are you taking that personally? Not everything is about you. I didn’t mention you and, in fact, wasn’t even thinking of you at all. These threads pop up annoyingly often and I was saying that, when they do, it seems pathetic that some people decide that this is the hill they want to die on - to be able to joke about women.
You poor thing. (sarcasm alert) Clearly, women who object to constantly being reduced to a pair of tits when they’re trying to speak are entitled and privileged to ask (again and again and again) to not be treated that way. Not the one who feels the need to start a thread protesting someone else being asked to stop that. Are you serious.
I think what we see on this thread with these disingenuous arguments is thinly veiled aggression, to be honest.