So I don’t understand why people laugh at me when I tell them I get up an hour early in the morning to get my poop on. That is, to be able to defecate before I take my shower so that I can walk around with that “clean” feeling during the day and not have to sit my ass down on those nasty men’s stalls in public restrooms and possibly end up in a stall without any toilet paper or seat covers or piss on the seat or brown streaks all over the bowl or whatnot. What’s the big deal? Get your poop on, people, I say, and start out the day clean and empty! Last time used a public toilet to poop: August 24, 2000. And Proud Of It.
I have to admit that I am a first thing in the morning crapper for the exact same reason…get it dealt with first thing in the morning, and get a nice shower=)
I do notice if I am ill and excrete, i am not really happy unless I can grab a shower afterwards which makes intestinal problems annoying on so many levels - the discomfort of actually being ill, and feeling scroungy as I don’t feel well enough to shower every time I go to the bathroom=(
I’m laughing at you, and I can’t even hear you!
I dunno whether I’m laughing at the thought of giving up an entire hour of prime sleeping time just for poop, or the paranoia at public toilets, or the rigorous, one might say anal, keeping track of when you last pooped on an unscheduled basis, or announcing to folks that you have these weird pooping habits…it’s all just mighty funny to me. 
I’m in shock :eek: How can you plan when you’re gonna need to release a chocolate hostage??? I need to make that special visit at least twice a day, often more.
Not knowing when it’s going to occur is half the fun, it makes the release that lil bit better.
Actually, it feels about time…
I presume that they think that your life is focused on feces to an inappropriate degree.
I mean, preferring to go before a shower and at home is quite reasonable. But when you build an hour into your schedule just for that and remember the date of your last public-toilet poop the way an AA member remembers the date of his last drink, I can’t help but think there must be something wrong with either your bowels or your brain.
Hey, hey, hey.
Don’t mock the man.
He’s right.
I’ve found that the best time to *download * is in the early morning. Every just goes much quicker and there are less interruptions.
:eek:
SO… um… do you guys think its weird if I only go every 4 days or so?? For some weird twisted psychological reason I HATE, erm, ‘making a deposit’. I put it off as long as possible and only do it under extreme duress.
I cannot BELIEVE I am explaining my toilet habits on a message board. Oh well, its for science… right?
I don’t get it. What takes an entire hour? Or does it take that long because you don’t really have to go, so you have to sit there and squeeze for an hour?
I actually prefer using my office’s toilets. I have a very old low-flush toilet at home (the kind that doesn’t properly flush, just gently swishes the the water down the bowl) and I worry about it getting clogged.
What is there not to like about it?
I always thought once a day was considered normal, but I go twice a day; I’m vegan and eat a lot fiber. I’d explode if I only went every four days…and probably end up as the subject for a thread on Fark.com. (“Woman’s bowels asplode…all your potty breaks are belong to us.”)
wouldnt it be more of an “upload” as your sending your “packet” to the watter wide web…
I always shower after I poop. I surprising number of people think this is odd.
shyly raises hand
Another Pre-shower Pooper here.
Daily routine: Get up, brush teeth, poop, shower, dress, leave.
I avoid public toilets unless it’s an emergency.
Heh…
If you look at it from my point of view, then *upload * looks like it belongs in the Extreme Fetish section of the porn sites.
:eek:
I find it hard to believe that Lieu has not yet graced us with his presence.
As for the OP, I don’t know how the hell you can even crap that early in the morning. I need a minimum 45 minutes of being awake and at least one cup of coffee before I need to pump out a grumpy.
That’d mean getting up almost two hours early, and that’s just crazy talk.
That topic’s quite a “conversation starter”.
Do you really favor people with stories of your morning constitutional?
Oh, and I DEFINITELY agree with the TMI tag!
<why do I insist on opening TMI threads?>
I actually prefer to poop at work, saves me TP at home and they’re paying me while I do it!
I am so stealing that…
I’m with you - you others are nuts for losing any sleep over this…
If I could get it out of the way 1st thing, I would, so I could have home bowl advantage. Sadly it doesn’t work this way, and I tend to late morning/early afternoon. But at least our work bathrooms are kept clean - they clean twice during the day, and once overnight. So we’re always well stocked and fairly clean.
And I just have to say that I love that you say “get your poop on” - I think I’m going to start using that myself.
I can’t go when I’m out of town. It’s worse when we fly. I think the pressurized cabin screws my digestive system up.
It’s great to get home to my own bathroom. Ahhhhh!