This is inspired by the “Should I tell my siblings when I borrow money from my mom” thread.
After I got out of college, I got a job I absolutely hated and quit to do the freelance thing a little over a year later. My parents encouraged me to make the jump into self-employment and provided a lot of support while I gave it a shot. 2 years and a ton of credit card debt later, I realize I’m not cut out for it and I got a “real” job.
During my 2 years of self-employment, my parents gave me a lot of money. I can’t even guess how much… at least $6-7K. Maybe more.
I’m still not in a position that I can write them a check for $6K. The money they gave me was always considered a gift… there was never an understanding that I would pay it back and no contracts were written. Still, I’d like to give them a big, fat “thank you” for their anniversary in November. I’ve got a few months to finish paying my credit card debt and start saving for their gift. I’d like to spend around $2-3K for something completely impractical they would never buy themselves.
I’ve considered buying them a trip to Europe, but my father has polio and can’t get around as well as he used to. I’m not sure how much he’d enjoy a vacation that requires a lot of walking and sight-seeing. I’ve considered a jacuzzi, but I’m not sure how much they would use it.
My father retires in June and my mother shortly after, so they’ll have plenty of time to enjoy whatever I give them. Any ideas out there?
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I’ve considered buying them a trip to Europe, but my father has polio and can’t get around as well as he used to. I’m not sure how much he’d enjoy a vacation that requires a lot of walking and sight-seeing. I’ve considered a jacuzzi, but I’m not sure how much they would use it.
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A cruise is usually a fraction of the cost for europe trip, you can get great deals, really, and your dad wouldnt have to do much walking around at all.
Dedicate a Parent-Appreciation day just for them: cook their meals, run their errands, drive them to see a movie… and when you bring them back home, give them a video titled, “Thanks for everything, Mom & Dad!” … letting them know how much you appreciate them… priceless
What do they like to do? What are their plans after retirement?
I like the cruise idea, particularly if you can go with them. That gives them time with you (which, frankly, they’d probably like more than the money), but you can also peel off at times so that they can have alone time. I can personally vouch that a cruise in Europe will be full of people with mobility problems.
You could also get them a computer, a big screen TV, gift certificates for driving-distance attractions (put together a package that includes hotel and restaurant gift certificates along with some ideas about things to do for weekend trips they can take after retirement).
Is there anything they want to remodel around the house that you could help with?
Other than that, my only suggestion is to think of something that you can do, at least in part, with them. I’m in a bit of a similar situation; my parents gave me a very generous gift that enabled me to go to school, and now that I’m in a position to pay them back, they won’t take the money. So I spend it on trips that I go on with them (we’ve gone wine tasting, whale watching, etc.). It gives us all time together, and we’re doing stuff we enjoy that they wouldn’t have necessarily done on their own.
A cruise is a good idea… our family took one maybe 10 years ago and had a great time. But it would be fun to splurge a bit to get them a nicer room or some kind of “deluxe” package. We did the Caribbean last time, but I hear cruises up to Alaska are neat too. Anyone done one of those?
My parents are pretty well off financially, so no rooms in their house need remodeled or anything. An HD TV would be nice, except my dad doesn’t watch TV at all. My mom watches a lot. My dad spends his free time in the garage fixing up old cars.
My dad also uses the internet a lot (he runs a business part time that will go full time once he retires that operates almost entirely online), but he refuses to buy cable access, saying its too expensive. A year of cable access with a wireless router and notebook might be nice for him. My gift tendencies tend to be toward gadgets and electronics, obviously. I just wonder if a couple of near-60 year olds would appreciate them.
Also, for the record, my dad isn’t at all “disabled”. He can still walk around, but he does so with a brace on one leg, so its more like a limp. He tries to avoid the stairs and slippery surfaces, but otherwise he does okay moving around. He’d be offended and insulted if I tried to schedule a trip around his bum leg, but at the same time he certainly can’t walk more than 30 or 40 minutes without needing a rest. More “restful” vacations (Hawaii, Florida, etc.) are their thing now, rather than the sight-seeing, lots of walking ones.
