Well, I just screwed up in a major way. Like, WAY major.
I thought my parents’ 50th anniversary was NEXT YEAR! IT’S NOT! It’s this year, in just a little less than a month, as my mom called to tell me today. OH CRAP.
Just the other day I had been thinking about either sending them on a trip or throwing them a party (thinking I had about six months to mull over details - I am not a last-minute sort of person, uh, normally). And then my mom calls and says she’s planning a small party for their 50th! In reality, this is probably best, since neither one of them is really in good enough health to take a trip, and my father hates crowds (he told my mom if more than 13 people showed up for their wedding, he was leaving!), so she knows who best to invite and keep him happy. But I still feel like a class A moron. And, I’m really behind the 8-ball now because I have no idea what I could get or do for them with a little less than a month before the fact. I’m an only child, too, whatever I do/get, will be everything they get from their offspring. I would offer to have them send me the bill for the party, but I am afraid they’ll say no, because that’s how they are. I guess I should offer anyway … maybe it’s the thought that counts on that.
Oh, please, help help help … I am SUCH an idiot … thank God for the Internet and being able to book tix and a car so I can be in Cleveland Labor Day weekend (they married on Sept. 1st).
Can’t help you out-my mother and I went to Canada for my father’s 60th birthday. And they’re still married.
Yeah, offer to pay for the party. At the same time-think about what they’d really like. Take them out for a very nice dinner somewhere? Is there something they’ve always wanted but would never buy for tehmselves-because it’s to “expensive or frivolous”? Go with that. If their health isn’t great, what about a DVD player and a collection of great movies?
(I admit to being terrible at this stuff-so be very careful with my suggestions)
My mother is 74 and my Dad is 72 (I think - I was stupid enough to mess up their 50th, I can’t trust my math on their ages either now!).
My parents are those kind of people that it’s hard to buy things for, because they have everything they need, certainly, and have been able to do most of what they want. My mother would like to travel more, but can’t due to the fact that she is blind and that makes it very difficult for her to get around.
My father had a stroke a few years back and while he can still get around, he’s very happy to stay home and watch television. They have a satellite with pretty much everything they’d like to watch.
The 50th anniversary is the Golden Anniversary. While I am sure my mother would enjoy gold jewelry, my father isn’t like that at all.
I think I will see if I can get a look at my Dad’s checkbook and try to arrange wire transfer for the party while I am at home. I think that might be the only way I can get them to accept the money … though for the first time in my life I wrote them checks for Mother’s and Father’s Day this year, and they thought that was really neat … of course when I was in college, it was always the other way around, and it took me until now to figure out they might like the tables to be turned for a change :).
My aunt and uncle had their 50th a while back. We had a big family reunion. But the coolest thing was that my cousin (their daughter) had a video made of photographs. Showed their whole life; early marriage, kids being born, etc. You might still have time!
How about tickets to a concert or show? Although you said your father doesn’t like crowds, though, so maybe that’s out. Although a theater or concert crowd is a bit different than having to deal with a ton of people you have to talk to, like at a party.
Anyhow, I sent my parents to the theater for one of my father’s favorite shows for their 40th anniversary and they really seemed to like it.
My parens’ 50th was in September '97. Mom said she wanted a collection of our childhood memories. The rest of our presents had a Norweigian theme because one sister (the doctor) got them a cruise to Norway. They went the following summer.
My brothers and sisters and I went through this in June. We took the whole clan of about 14 people out to dinner at Morton’s of Chicago in Tyson’s Corner, VA. My brother Joe made the reservations at the restaurant, my sister Margaret hired the limousine, and I ordered a sheet cake with a picture of them at their wedding reception on top. Now granted we had plenty of notice, but something like that should be fairly easy to do. Many times parents don’t necessarily want you to spend a lot of money on them, they want you to spend a lot of time with them. My mom said that the entire evening was a success because none of us argued the whole evening.
My mom and dad’s 40th anniversary is in 3 weeks. We’re surprising them by taking them to a local restaurant. What they don’t know is that we’ve invited all their siblings and spouses to join us.
We stipulated no presents, but asked all attendees to write down their favorite memories of the couple and to bring pictures of them thoughout the years. We’ll bind everything up in a memory book.