Give me some random freeway directions.

Okay, I’m just being silly here, but I wanted to point out some corrections …

bearflag70’s directions don’t get you all the way to Sacramento on 101 (note lack of article). What you have to do is when you hit the 680/280 interchange, take 680 North.

After about 70 miles you’ll cross the Benicia Bridge ($2 toll). You should roll up all your windows and hit the ‘recycle air’ button before you reach the bridge; you’ll probably smell the refineries in Martinez. Don’t roll down the windows until you’re past Benicia, like where the highway curves and you can see the big open fields and the wild goose sanctuary.

680 will eventually hit 80 and you take 80 East to Sacramento. But if it’s Friday or there’s even a hint of traffic near the bridge, take the Gold Hill exit before the interchange. It’ll run along the freeway for a while before coming to a stop sign. You’ll see that you’re not allowed to turn right on Fridays, and it’s a bad road anyways. You take a left, then a right, then another right right away. Stay on that road; it’ll eventually head around into the hills.

Once it levels back out turn left on Chadbourne Rd. and you’ll be coming behind the Budweiser plant, and you’ll see the Jelly Belly place too. From there you get to 80 East and proceed to Sacramento, having bypassed that whole mess at the 80/680 interchange.

As for White Lightning’s directions (which, as said, are perfectly correct in the sense of being able to follow them – unlike the ones I usually give, which are correct in detail but difficult to follow)… It’s the 113 North exit. 113 South would take you to Dixon. 113 South is 10 miles before the Woodland exit anyway.

The third exit off 113 is Road 31, the street is Covell … I knew a guy who worked for Unitrans who was driving the P line and this elderly woman told him she had known Mayor Covell, and everyone says the street name wrong, it should be (CUH-vell, not coh-VELL). But I think maybe people just don’t want to confuse it with Cowell. I had some friends get lost for a while on that one … where was I? Going down Covell. Yeah, you take F St. and the apartments there are Parkside. Don’t park your bike there overnight, it’ll probably get stolen.

Seems as good a jumping off place as any … from Parkside apartments, head down F St. again. Make a right on Fifth. We’ll take the long way around, so you can see my old dorms. Take Fifth all the way past campus. Make a left on to La Rue – yeah, those are the dorms on the left. No, I lived in the other ones. Tercero. Uh, that’s Segundo. They didn’t have a Primero for a while, but they rebuilt it, and Cuarto’s off-campus.

Follow La Rue for a while – there, you see those buildings? No, not the cow barn, right behind them, that’s where I lived, except on the other side. After the curve, make a right at the stop sign. Then another left right away at the stop sign. That’s Old Davis Road, part of the Loop Road.

After the light, turn left at the stop sign. Then another right just after that, on to First St. When you get to B, you have to stop. Used to be you didn’t have to stop at that stop sign, but it got too confusing, so they stopped that.

Anyway, keep going on First and then make a right at the second light, under the train overpass.

Past the stoplight, get onto 80 East towards Sacramento. After you cross the causeway, keep on Business 80/Highway 50 which heads to the south. Then stay on Highway 50 when Business 80 breaks off.

Follow 50 all the way up. There’s a stoplight in Placerville, so make sure you slow down there. After that, it gets a lot steeper and windier. You can still see some of the houses wrecked in the mudslide along the river. Probably too difficult to remove them until they fall farther in.

Once you get to the top of the pass, it’s real steep going down, so go slow. Besides, you can enjoy the view of Lake Tahoe as you head down towards it. Then continue for the rest of the 3073 miles to Ocean City, MD.

Heh … to get from the OP’s Swains to the Borders I frequent when I’m in town, leave the parking lot onto Glendale Ave and hang a right. Keep going till you hit Broadway (you’ll see the big ugly city building on stilts on your right). Hang a right there. Hang a left at Circuit city to get into the most convenient parking garage, or keep going and you’ll see the big ol’ glass windows of Borders on the left. After that, it’s just a few blocks up Brand to some of my favorite used book stores.

Or you could head left up Glendale Ave for a while, till it turns into (as I recall) Verdugo, hang a left and park in the park, cross the bridge to Glendale Community College, and ask a passing student where the Coffee Cart is. The location of this caffeine hookup changes randomly, but if you can find the Coffee Cart, you can find the still-enrolled remains of the Freaks Corner. And if Larry’s working the cart, ask him for a Larry’s Mistake.

Part of the time I work in Houston. Here are the directions from the motel I routinely stay in:

Turn right out of the motel entrance onto the I-45 northbound feeder road. Stay on the feeder until you reach FM 1960; take the U-turn lane underneath the freeway and head south. Take the first entrance ramp onto I-45, and travel south until the exit for Beltway 8 East. Get back on the feeder, turn left at the first light and take the beltway feeder about two miles to West Hardy St. Stop in the convenience store for a coffee and a cheese danish, then take W. Hardy south to Aldine-Bender Rd. Make a right onto Aldine-Bender, then head west a quarter mile until you see a bright pink frame building on the left. Just before the pink monstrosity, turn left onto Henry Rd. Go about a mile until you see the company sign on the left, and pull in the driveway. Visitor parking is marked in front of the warehouse.

Part of the time I work at home. Here are the directions:

Get out of bed on the side nearest the bedroom door. Walk westbound ten steps into the office.

Let’s see here… from here to my SO’s: (Warning: out of state trip)

Pull out of driveway, head to the right. At T intersection, turn left. Turn right at next intersection. Turn left onto Park. Turn right onto Semmes, unless there’s a train sitting there. (In that case, make a u-turn, turn left and take underpass, meet up with Lamar at a different point.) Go down Semmes, until you reach Lamar Ave. Turn left onto Lamar, keep going until you hit I-20 near Birmingham. Take I-20 East, and keep going… keep going… keep going… until you hit Columbia, SC. Hop onto I-26, take St. Andrews Blvd. exit, head to the right, take first left at stoplight (you’re turing onto a frontage road), head that way for a bit and you’re there. :smiley:

I’m not even going to try to give directions that involve Parkway, or the I-40/240 loop around town. (You see, you go down East Parkway North, turn right onto North Parkway East…)

<< Calculus and alcohol don’t mix: never drink and derive. >>

Wow, Narrad, you make me glad I live in Daglish and not way south of the river! Especially these days, since I have moved to the medical school campus at Charlie Gairdner’s and uni is just a few minutes away… UWA rocks! :slight_smile:

Ok, so if you wanna get to my favourite holiday-spot, you take Kwinana Freeway south all the way down to the end, then take Safety Bay Road til you get to Ennis Avenue. Hang a left on to Ennis Ave (you have to go round a roundabout) then keep on going to Mandurah.

When you get to Mandurah, keep on going straight through (but make sure you don’t speed), and when you get out on the other side you’ll be on the Coast Rd… go on all the way to Bunbury (about 100km).

There’s a big roundabout when you get to Bunbury; take the first exit. I don’t know what the road is called, but take it straight ahead to the end (through a couple of traffic lights) and turn left at the T-junction. Now you’re on your way to Busselton. Just before you get there jump on to the Busselton Bypass (another roundabout). At the end of the Bypass turn left onto Bussell Highway towards Margaret River. Keep driving another 50kms or so to Margaret River. Yay!

To get from my house to The Pike Place Market in Seattle:

Take Fairwood Ranch road to Nels Nelson Rd, turn Left. Go about 1/2 mile to Fairgrounds road, turn Left again. Take Fairgrounds to Washington Highway 303 - turn right. Take 303 all the way to Burwell Ave in Downtwon Bremerton, turn Left. Go to the next traffic light, turn Right - you’ll be on Pacific. Take Pacific until it ends, staying in the middle lane (Pacific is One Way at this point). Turn Left - you’ll be in the loading lane for the Washington State Ferries to Seattle. Take the ferry (approximately one hour to cross - $10), unload at Coleman Dock, which will put you on Alaskan Way, going south (no option - a Left to go north is illegal). Take this to Royal Brougham Way, turn Left, go one block to 1st Ave, turn Left again. Stay on First until Madison, turn Left, then Right on Western Ave. Take Western about 5 blocks, and the entrance to The Pike Place Market parking Garage will be on the Left.

(note - there is actually a better way to do this once you are in Seattle - basically taking the first legal left after getting off the ferry and doubling back to Alaskan Way - but I don’t know the street names. There is another entrance to the garage on Alaskan Way)

Going to work for me is a history/geography lesson:

Take Willett South to Poplar and head West. When you come around the curve and the New Bridge comes into view, take a left on Manassas.

(The New Bridge, over the Mississippi River, is so called to distinguish it from the Old Bridge, even though the New Bridge is 30-odd years old. It’s in the Guinness Book as the largest free-standing letter of the alphabet in the world, being a double-humped bridge to make an M for Memphis. Official name: The Hernando DeSoto bridge, after the first European explorer to come through this part of the continent.)

Take Manassas south to Union Avenue, where there is a park to your left with a statue of Nathan Bedford Forrest, founder of the KKK. Turn right on Union.

(Please don’t all you non-Southerners start flaming about the KKK. I know they’re assholes. Everyone knows they’re assholes. Forrest was a historically noteworthy figure for a lot of other reasons, and anyway the sheet-draped goatlovers of today have nothing at all to do with the club Forrest founded. I’d rather be a black man in Memphis than in Des Moines, Iowa.)

Immediately, you will see Sun Studio on your right. At that light, turn left on Myrtle.

(Sun Studio, of course, is probably the only place that can call itself “the birthplace of Rock and Roll” and mean it. The list of performers who first recorded in that little room is amazing: B.B. King, Muddy Waters, Howlin’ Wolf, Rufus Thomas, Elvis, Johnny Cash, Carl Perkins, Roy Orbison, and on and on and on. Oh, and U2 recorded some of “Rattle and Hum” there.)

Go down the very short hill to the stop sign at the bottom of Myrtle and turn right. You are now at the extreme eastern end of Beale Street.

(Surely I don’t have to tell people about Beale Street.)

Go park at the parking lot across from the newspaper.

(The newspaper was founded in 1841; I don’t know the stats, but it’s got to be one of the oldest ones still running, right?)

And that’s my trip to work.

Des Moines’s mayor, Preston Daniels, happens to be a black man.

To get from Richmond to the Paintball Authority playing fields:

Take 64 to 76 south
Take the Midlothian Turnpike/Route 60 West exit
Drive until you see lots of trees (Yes, it is past the damn mall!)
After you see the “Welcome to Powhatan” sign, floor it for two more miles
Slam the brakes and swerve left onto route 676/Urbine Rd.
Take a left at the giant sign with the big day-glo orange splat that says “Panitball Authority” on it.
Can you tell that I give these directions every day at work? Sometimes I just want to trick people and send them down to Blackwell…

The three-term mayor of Memphis, Dr. W. W. Herenton, is also a black man.

Poorly chosen phrase on my part; I probably should have just left it out. What I meant was that in Memphis everyone is totally accustomed to being around people of different races, while in Des Moines, where I lived for two years, black people are stared at. Children would point. Heck, my girlfriend at the time was Chinese, and people would stare and occasionally point at us.

No offense at all to Iowans; Iowa is a lovely state, and Des Moines is a lovely city. My bad.

except - been there. ain’t going there again.

BTW - NBF quit the KKK (1868?) over it’s use of violence.

he was a remarkable man, but could not rise above his times and background.

panamajack, thanks for the straight dope on getting to the 101!

Dragonblink, you have made my day. Absolutely made my day. Thanks for those directions. I get so homesick sometimes, so reading about the weird govt. building on Glendale and Broadway was a delight. And - you know the big Post Office that is about a block or two down (heading towards Brand) on Broadway? My dad worked there for a LONG time.

Yes! Verdugo Park! The annual Post Office picnic was held there! It’s always a bitch when one of those small circuses is in town, because they use the Park, and then all the parking for GCC is taken.

What is this Coffee Cart you speak of? I was a “chronic” (and I DO mean chronic) student at GCC for many a year. But it’s been a while since I’ve been there. (I ran out of pottery classes to take there, so had to take classes at the LaCañada Youth House, up on Foothill Blvd. (in La Cañada, oddly enough). I can’t recall which cross-street the Youth House is on, but there is a popular restaurant near it.

So, let’s go from Verdugo Park to Montrose, which is a little north. It has a lot of great little shops, including the Black Cow restaurant, which has some yummy food. Interestingly, I grew up near Montrose, and used to walk down to the shopping center as a kid. Years ago, it wasn’t much, but nice enough. Now it has grown into a place that attracts people from all over. For a while, the Bowling Alley was a hangout for movie stars (it may still be, I don’t know) and the restaurants apparently have a good reputation. Go figure.

Pass Verdugo Park and keep heading down Glendale Ave. heading towards Montrose. You’ll pass a park or tennis courts of some sort on your right, and you’ll go through a residential area, with some nice houses, with pretty lawns. You’ll start to go around a curve, and you’ll see a side road on your left, which has a sign for a country club (“Oak” something, I think). Go past that. You’ll approach a signal, and will be given a choice to keep going up the hill (straight) or turn left, past a golf course. Go up the hill.

You’ll pass some shops on both sides, including a moving company. There is a rather nice center divider on this road, with trees planted on it. (By the way, you can see this road, with its center divider, in a scene in the old film nior film “Gun Crazy”, which was shot in Montrose. Now you know.) Keep going up the hill. Get in the left lane, you’ll be turning left up ahead. When you get to a big signal, you’ll be at Honolulu Ave. You’ll see a bunch of shops (Shell or Mobil station, supermarket, Vons, etc.) to your right. On your left you’ll see the beginning of the Montrose Shopping mall, which is just a few streets of very nice little shops. Turn left. Be careful, there are a lot of pedestrians, and you need to drive slowly. The Black Cow should be in the first block or so, on your right. If you can find parking on the street, great, but don’t count on it. Instead, just turn up one of the cross streets (I believe Ocean View is the next big cross street) and turn right again at the next street. You’ll find plenty of public parking lots there.

If you like, after eating at the Black Cow, you can get back on Honolulu Ave., pass Glendale Ave. again, and follow Honolulu up the hill towards the 2 freeway. Don’t get on the freeway, though. Go under the freeway. You’ll see a movie theatre there (the movie theatre in downtown Montrose burned down ages ago - I still miss it). You’ll see a car dealership, and then a hospital (Vedugo Hills). Pass by them all. Follow the road up the hill. If you keep on going up the hill, you’ll hit Foothill Blvd. in La Cañada. There’s a See’s Candies on your left, and if you keep going, you’ll eventually hit LaCañada Youth House. And, I can’t recall exactly how you get there (I always just followed my nose) you can get to Descanso Gardens, which is absolutely sublime.