Given Names -- What were they thinking?

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

I know it’s the parents’ (or maybe the agent’s) fault for these things happening, but how would you like to be strapped with a name like Hilaria? Just yesterday I was trying to think of a way to start a thread where we could point at some misfires in the naming department, with my choice being Secretia, but decided it might be too tacky. But today’s headline brought the idea back.

What are some questionable names you have either encountered for real or have imagined for somebody you don’t particularly admire?

Fallopia
Equestria

2

Aleander.

Yes, that’s right.

Aleander. For a boy. Encountered for real.

3

I was just reminded yesterday that Nicole Richie named her son Sparrow. Yeah, he’s not going to get his ass kicked on a daily basis with that, nosiree.

4

Except his social group is filled with idiotic names.

Or he could go with the nickname “Jack”.

5

One of my patients is named Antwarn.

Really.

I can prove it.

6

That variation must be one of at least a dozen I have seen (mostly in football players) for Antoine.

I’d be hard-pressed to think of the second most abused spelling, but I am reminded of an apocryphal thing that was most likely a joke:

A first-grade teacher asks a student for his name and he replies “O.Z.” When she asks what O.Z. stands for he says, “Onree Zavier.”

7

It’s Antfarm, Qadgop. You have a couple of typos on his file.

8

A customer of mine’s last name is Berning. His parents bequeathed unto him the name Richard. He goes by Dick. Yup, Dick Berning. Seriously, WTF?

9

I’m waiting to encounter the following names IRL:

LaQwerty
Hubris
Placenta

10

As a side note (as opposed to a spinoff thread) I always enjoy coming up with name combos like:

Phyllis Willis
Doris Morris
Daryl Jarrell
Bob Dobbs
Ben Chen
Kate Tate

11

My dad worked with Cdr. Darling.

12

A true and real name of a middle school girl- Chimera (pronounced shuh mara)
Then there were the twin brothers, Lavoris and Travoris.
People should check a dictionary before assigning creative names to their children.

13

Trashanda

14

One of the young women in our distribution department has the first name of Youranus.:smack: To be fair, her parents are immigrannts from Guatamala and likely wanted to name her Uranus, which would be bad enough, but holy crap, couldn’t they at least have consulted with someone whose first language was American English?

15

Thankfully (we must hope) they skipped over Clitoris! I have often wondered how much thought Cloris Leachman’s parents gave to her name.

By now everybody must have heard of the kid named Shithead (pronounced Shuh-Theed). :smiley:

16

Similarly — and I’ve posted this before — Antoine II.

What’s wrong with that?

It’s pronounced “An-toyn two”. The poor kid will proudly tell you his name is “Antoine Two [Smith]”.

I haven’t asked whether the father has added the requisite “1” to his own moniker.

17

They do, & when they can’t find it, they think it’s unique & original & go with it. :smiley:

Bruce Willis’s kids are Rumer & Scout.

My dad had a patient whose name was pronounced (fem-ah-lee), but with the more common spelling of “female”. Apparently Mom didn’t have a name so the the birth cert said female _____; when Mom saw it she said, “Ah fem-ah-lee, that’s pretty, that’ll be her name.” :smack: I swear it’s true!

18

I was almost called Quentin.

Sad

19

Oh dear, I’ve got a list. Literally. When my sister-in-law was expecting, I started keeping a list of all the great names I came across at the hospital. Some of my favorites:

[ul]
[li]Bradier (I can only assume he was one of triplets, with his siblings** Brady** and Bradiest)[/li][li]Amandla (Yes, it’s Amanda. With an L. Why??)[/li][li]Mykle[/li][li]Nylona[/li][li]Sharnquovia[/li][li]Ysea (Supposed to be Isaiah, maybe?)[/li][li]Rmanie (I presume it’s for Armani)[/li][li]A’Lexus[/li][/ul]

20

“The love of your life was a black woman named Shady Nasty?” “It’s Sha-Dynasty!”