Grow a thicker skin? You think the people who work at GLAAD don’t have tough skin? You think they don’t deal with kids beaten up, abandoned, murdered, raped or driven to suicide for being gay every day? The OP might expect them to be able to handle an offhand slur, but what about the gay children and teens, the ones who will, I guarantee, be on the receiving end of the f-word in their life. No exceptions.
True. God forbid some stupid teens who call everyone (including the actual gay kids) a fag, like it is the lowest of the low – and they do – see this guy getting raked over the coals for using the word. Who else is telling them, or gay kids, that it’s wrong?
I, for one, don’t really care when someone who says something like that decides he has “atoned” sufficiently, but he’s perfectly free to decide he’s atoned enough. And you and all the other straight people (because I notice the self-identified gay people in this thread are not as willing to let it go) are free to give him your straight stamp of approval.
He has decided he wants something more; he wants someone to give him an imprimatur of approval – a “get out of saying homophobic things free” card. I don’t see why he or anyone else who throws slurs around is entitled to that. If some group wants to grant their approval of him contingent on him doing something, it’s his choice whether or not to accept. Unless you think straight people are entitled to avoid all the social consequences of saying obnoxiously homophobic things.
“Your Honor, I was stupid and insensitive enough to run this poor fellow over with my car, but it was my mistake, so I’ll decide how much to pay in damages.”
This is a great point. Anyone who has done any kind of public advocacy work on LGBT issues has to have a very tough skin – it’s very, very difficult to handle doing that kind of work at all, and making a career out of it to the point where you’re in a high position in a well-known national LGBT organization means you’ve done a lot of this work for a long time. It is pretty much certain that the people Ratner’s talking to at GLAAD have suffered more than their share of slurs worse than this to their faces, and probably threats and maybe even violence as well.
It’s a childish attempt to mock LGBT advocates’ work to say that the people who have the guts to actually stand up and put themselves out there and expose themselves to even more abuse than LGBT people already receive are just “thin-skinned.”
Yes, when will someone stand up for America’s most persecuted group, homophobic fratboy douchebags who make terrible movies.
It’s amazing how whiny and sensitive straight white males can be. “WAH WAH WAH, I’m being held responsible for my own actions. MOMMMY, THAT’S NOT FAIIIIIIIRRRR!”
You might want to look up what the word “equivocation” means to avoid embarrassing yourself this way again, because this was not an example of equivocation. What he or she did was form an analogy which is a perfectly valid way to illustrate a point.
The point being that when someone does something harmful, it’s not really up to them to decide when they’ve atoned sufficiently. At least not in any other aspect of life. Especially given that, in this case, the requirement is not even being imposed upon this Ratner jerk – he agreed to this because he wants to earn back the respect of the community. (Or even, though I doubt this, because he actually sees the error of his ways and wants to help work to make the world a better place.)
It’s not really ever up to a person who did something wrong to decide when they’re entitled to forgiveness from others. Or do you disagree?
I’m glad you think it’s nice. Care to add any actual content to that?
I’m simply sharing the viewpoint of someone I know who’s closer to this issue than I. I’m certainly not trying to serve as the authority on how all gay epithets should be received by all; I just wanted to put it out there how there are received by some. Perhaps this came off wrong, and if so, I apologize.
As for the rest of your post, I was all set to post a response, but then I realized that this is Brett Ratner we’re talking about. Frankly, I wasn’t really surprised that such an overgrown frat-boy would say something stupid like this, and he could be pilloried in the town square for all I care. This just gives me one more reason to avoid his work, in addition to the racial stereotypes his movies have perpetuated, and the mysoginistic comments he’s made before.
I guess it’s the general principle that I object to, that if some celebrity says/does something stupid, that somehow, a group representing the offended segment can coopt said celebrity’s penance, so to speak, to further any kind of dialog. I say, just publicize the hell out of what was said/done, and let the celebrity redeem or damn themselves with their own actions.
In my opinion, I do think Ratner sounded quite sincere, and made an appropriate act of contrition - if he wants to do more, that’s great, although I still won’t see his shitty films.
Somehow it seemed unnecessary to hear your friend’s opinion second-hand when several people here had already identified ourselves as gay and shared our thoughts.
So he’s a racist, misogynist homophobe, and it’s still a problem to you that GLAAD spoke out against his little joke. And I guess to me, it seems like the most appropriate possible time to make it clear that homophobic slurs are not OK would be when a celebrity uses one in an interview. I mean, if it’s not OK for gay people to speak up then, is there any conceivable circumstance in which it would be OK with you for a gay person to make a public statement that slurs directed at us are unacceptable?
First off - I was indeed mistaken using “equivocate” in the sense that I did. I was conflating a couple different concepts, and the word that rattled out of my brain was “equivocate” - that’s what I get for throwing around $10 words on a $5 budget…
I was thinking of ways to respond to this, but I just need to drop this. While I still feel that GLAAD’s statement had an air of “we’ve got him on the hook now for at least 10 PSAs” - which really runs counter to my feelings on self-determination and how one should make amends for one’s (non-criminal) actions - I also realize that I’m veering dangerously close to the sort of arguments that right-wingers are probably making right now about this issue.
As someone who fully supports gay rights in all forms any chance I get, in this case airing my personal beliefs on this matter doesn’t really advance the discourse on the topic. So, bowing out with whatever grace I can muster.
Again, GLAAD is not a legal organization and they have no authority over anyone not part of their organization. If they tell Brett Ratner to do 10 PSAs, he can tell them to fuck off. No one’s self-determination is being stepped on.
To me political correctness is getting out of hand. I just wonder where does it all stop. Will I be banned from this message board 2 years from now for calling someone a liberal douche bag in the pit even when the consensus is that yes, the poster is a liberal douche bag but it’s mean to say so.
One large supposedly edgy message board has recently made using the words gay and fag in a derogatory way a bannable offense.
Here you can easily get pitted if you dare suggest that maybe being fat is your own fault.
If you’re a man pretty much anything you say to a woman is potentially a sexual harassment suit or at least a trip down to the HR department for sensitivity training. Do not ever comment on her hair, outfit, scent, sense of humor, looks in general and for Gods sake don’t let her catch you glancing at her breast.
Oh and almost any joke, especially in an office environment is risky to tell because someone somewhere is sure to be offended.
I’ve seen the future and it’s going to be pixie dust, pink unicorns, rainbows, care bears, my little pony cartoon shows and fairies…oops sorry.
Translation: "I have no ability to understand the nuances of anything that has been said so far in this thread. All I can hear is that evil liberals are going to dare impinge upon my ability to be an unrestricted asshole. "
And I mean look, I understand that you’re probably a straight white dude that feels it’s his inborn right to splooge your wants and feelings over everything and everyone. I mean, how dare you be expected to act professional and not make unwanted advances on women in the workplace? How dare anyone tell you that you can’t put queers and fatties and liberal douches in their place. Of course you’re going to respond with a tantrum about “political correctness”. But it’s maybe time to grow up and start thinking like an adult that recognizes others in the world have rights and feelings too.