God vs. Barbie... (sort of long, beg pardon)

OK doke… someone pinch me, I must be dreaming. I must be a heathen, a pagan barbarian who slaughters good, christian virgins for breakfast. Does anyone else think these folks are too religious!? I googled Secret Spell Barbie because I am going to purchase one (if I can find one that hasn’t been hiked up in price to the pearly gates) and lo’ and behold, this lil’ number popped up.

Yes, Mattel wishes to encourage Satan worship and wicked depravity to the little girls of the world… cough ahem, get a friggin’ grip. :rolleyes:

Who thinks this new Barbie is the devil incarnate? Please, please say you do! I need a good laugh.

Isn’t religion a manmade idea, for all intents and purposes? Come on, how many religions are there for frick’s sake?

This website makes me want to laugh, puke, and scream all at once! So much damage is done in the name of God and whatnot that it’s a joke to me, literally a joke. I am so sick of religious fanatics stuffing their crapped out misinformation down my throat that I am thinking of starting an anti-religion. :dubious:

I literally want to be sick at the thought of religion being used to torment others, no matter how good the intention behind it. How many kids are mentally, emotionally, physically abused by the churches they are born/trapped into by their God-fearing parents? Enough is fuckin’ enough. :mad:

I had to join for my own sanity and your enjoyment. Let the games begin…

You may not be aware of this, but if you go around over there saying that you’re from the SDMB and you’re out to fight ignorance, there’s a good chance you’ll get in trouble over here. We had some problems a while back with a fundamentalist Christian board (the “no socks” rule was instituted as a direct result of that situation, IIRC), and no one here wants a repeat of that.

I am not advertising anything but my own beliefs, don’t fret. I won’t ever mention this board if and when I go wandering through the internet jungle. Why do you assume I would ever use the SDMB as a safety net? One thing has nothing to do with the other, in my mind.

Thanks for your concern though…

Funny thing is, Mattel is actually one of my allies.

I read the first few pages. That Jason guy cracks me up.

Oh good grief!!!


I don’t know of a preteen or young teen that DIDN’T dabble in charms or spells when I was a girl. Yeah, like they’re all going to take to devil worship, dancing naked in the moonlight and sacrificing infants.

This is the same sort of attitude that abounded during the Salem witch trials tragedy. Girls doing harmless spells to see “who their husbands would be” and then shortly after the outbreak of their “being taken with fits” the community blamed it on witchcraft.

I’ve read quite a few books on the Salem witch trials and modern theories on what might have happened.

There are a lot of books around that suggest that it might have been rye ergot as is explained in the following link:


Anyway, sorry for the slight history hijack. This is just silly, worse than the nonsense surrounding the mommy “Barbie” awhile back.

This is one of the reasons I’m a christian who does NOT belong to a church. These people just go looking to borrow trouble, they see something “dirty” where nothing is, and they see “devil worship” in the most mundane things.


Children are naive – they trust everyone. School is bad enough, but, if you put a child anywhere in the vicinity of a church, you’re asking for trouble.

My best advice to anyone who wants to raise a happy, mentally healthy child is: Keep him or her as far away from a church as you can.

– Frank Zappa

Moving this to the BBQ Pit.

Perhaps to appease the fundies, Mattel could come out with Missionary Barbie. Dress her in pretty flowered dresses with appropriate pumps, carrying a Bible and when you press her back, she speaks in tongues.

Of course, I know others would rather see Missionary Position Barbie.


(A previous post, seem appropriate.)

Religious people I have known:

The Suckling - Hi, I’m religious, see my Bible?

The Follower - I pray all the time. Some day my prayers will be answered. There really is a God, isn’t there?

The Brother - My religion is a deeply personal thing. You don’t want to get into a game of Bible trivia against me.

The Elder - I’m a cranky old bastard, but I go to church every Sunday.

The Deity - I have my beliefs, you have yours, let’s party.

When I saw an ad for this on TV I knew the fundies would pitch a fit. So predictable.

Mother Theresa Barbie?

Church Lady Barbie

Whatever happened to Crack Whore Barbie?

Yo man lihizzle shorthizzle my nizzle.

The Hymen Barbie… it never loses it.

I’m far more concerned that Barbie perpetuates the idea that the ideal of female beauty is to be a six feet tall blonde with a 13 inch waist and bullet boobs, who perpetually stands on tiptoe.

And I’m not all that concerned about that.

I just hope you all understand these are the “Harry Potter = Satan” variety of Christians, and theirs are not the views of mainstream American Christianity.

Well, I don’t know about the first and the last, but the middle one should be encouraged whenever possible! :wink:

Hee hee!