I notice the esteemed Mr. Freely is now at post #999. It’ll be interesting to see what he does with post #1000.
Dammit waterj2! You ruined the whole production!
Yeah, it’s my 1000th post. In fact, I was sort of planning this from the beginning. I thought it was gonna be pretty fucking funny. But thanks to our resident crafty-bastard, it’s fallen flat.
Oh well, there’s always 2000.
Anyway… WOOHOO!!! 1000 POSTS!!! PARRRRRR-TAY!!!
Oh, that is just too funny. Nearly fell out of my chair laughing. Plan an elaborate joke, then someone wanders in and blows the whole thing away. Didn’t mean to fuck the whole thing up, but I do find it more amusing this way.
Long live waterj2, destroyer of FreakFreely’s secret 1000th post party!
That party was damn worth it. Everyone assumes by my post count that I’m some newbie, and dammit, I’ve been around 2 1/2 years! Since the freakin’ AOL days! (I’ve just changed screennames, and then posts weren’t even counted when the UBB went up…and…and…wuhl, it would all add up to a couple thousand posts…) It takes time for me to accumulate posts because I don’t usually find it necessary to comment on most threads I read. That, and I do have a life. (Sorry, had to go for the jab… 
…Wait, fuck that smilie, this is the Pit!)
I had that party because it took freakin’ FOREVER to get there, and you can rest assured that when I get to 1000 posts sometime in 2004, I will have the effin’ party. Dammit.
Some of us like the attention because we don’t post often enough to get much attention otherwise.
That, and it takes time to come up with such thought provoking threads as “Oral Sex Techniques” (as LauraRae)
::fleeing::
Satan – “We all know that you get it all the time.”
Well, yes I do, but do you really think you should be telling Drain about that? I mean, hey, if you want to go “public” and all, I’m all for it but, uh, don’t you think she’s gonna be pissed?
Hey, I assure you, that was an honest search for intelligent advice–and it was indeed quite provoking. I gained a great deal of education from that thread, lemme tell yah. (And dammit, Ed deleted it in the great BB trim-down a few months ago…sigh…I knew I should have printed it out.)
The Llama is still quite grateful for that thread.
We (the staff) were diligently archiving things…and we thought that the archives would move when we went to vBulletin. Alas, no, they didn’t. And this has us QUITE upset.
If the Llama is so grateful, he should buy us dopers drinks and fried cheese products at the next gathering. Even those of us who didn’t contribute to the thread. Because, umm. Because. Well, because I like free stuff.
I don’t mind the post count parties. I never contribute, because I don’t have any clever ways to say, congratulations on typing lots of words. I haven’t had one yet; every time I actually check to see how many posts I have- its some odd number that if I had a post count party; people would mock me more than they regularly do.
I wish there was a smilie that had a monkey doing cartwheels over a root beer barrel. Because, if there ever was a time for such a smiley, this would be it. Of course, I don’t know if there would ever be a time were that smilie wouldn’t be appropriate. (Perhaps a thread about drunk driving monkeys)
pat
Here’s something FreakFreely said in a thread he started.
The irony astounds…
Hey Drainy, scroll up. It was a joke.
Oh, I’m sorry. I guess you didn’t get it.
The irony astounds…
Well, Laura, I don’t argue that it was quite…uh…provoking. And stimulating as well.
You may not believe this, but I believe I have a…uhhh…hard (insert joke here) copy of that thread.
Seriously! I printed it out to read and then decided to keep it. I thought I’d show it to my girlfriend. When I find a girlfriend. Damn paper will probably have turned to dust by then. Anyone have a scanner I can borrow?
How much would a copy be worth to you?
Gotta be careful here–those Llamas are MEAN SOBs…So, no, not that (though it sure is tempting). I’ll give you a copy if you promise to load it onto your webpage and keep it there for a year! 
Now is the time to do your part to fight ignorance!
Whaddya say? 
Mail your ummmm hard copy to me. I’ll scan it. Then I’ll mail the hard copy back. Really. Promise.
I keep trying to get you out to LA. Fly out here and I’ll not only get you a copy of this thread, I’ll give you valuable an opportunity for ahem hands on training.
And if anyone couldn’t have seen that line from a mile away: You Very Stupid… (As Jim Rome likes to say)
Sorry DRY, no dice. I’m not putting that thread up on my webpage…hate to scare of the family. Of course, if you’d like to offer me a copy because you’re a nice guy and thoughtful friend, that would be wonderful.
Maybe if I found a girlfriend for you? (Not that you should trust my matchmaking skills.) Or…bought you a drink at the next Shin-Dig?
And pricciar, go soak your head. I’m not sure what that means, but it is an amusing phrase. Maybe soak it in one of those drinks you were trying to mooch? (Naw, yer post was too funny for that)
Oh, well, it was worth a try…
**
Found a girlfriend for me? What makes you think I need your help?
Oh, all right…I do.
If I do have a printed out copy, I’ll give it to you at the next Doper-Fest/Shin-Dig that we both attend. Who else wants one?
Oh DRY, I can’t wait to get my hands on your hard copy…
Sorry, Drain Bead, DRY has managed to turn yet another good Pit thread into a flirt-fest. Shame on him.
Pad.
Apparently, in searching for this thread, you didn’t try very…umm…hard.
http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?threadid=11010
You’re welcome (You too, AudreyK)
Did you know that there were 35 threads with LauraRae as user and “Oral Sex” as a set of keywords. Not drawing any conclusions, but I found it, um…interesting.
Yes… interesting…