Why are Internet mother’s day gift suggestions so bad? Why are hippie, goth, techno-pagan and even Beat generation mothers not recognised? Yahoo’s suggestion for “cyber queens” is a grill fork thermometer for meats and fish. “Mothers who read” will definitely not be getting Marilyn Manson’s biography this year. All this makes Tim Berners-Lee seem about as wired as Barney Rubble.
Since that didn’t really make much sense, I tried the English to German and back version:
That seems to have clarified it.
Clear as a bell
The 80’s Valley Girl translation is so much better.
Like, I totally just remembered, I have go to the mall later because me and Lisa and Heather and Heather’s sister Sherry (who is such a total drag), we’re like gonna go shopping, you know?
Anyway… Why are Network for, like, total spazzes mother’s day gift suggestions so grody to the max Why are hippie, goth, techno-pagan and even Beat generation mothers not recognised? Like, I am so sure! Yahoo’s suggestion for “cyber queens” is totally a grill fork thermometer for meats and fish. “Mothers who read” will definitely not be getting Marilyn Manson’s biography this year. All this makes Tim Berners-Lee seem like, you know, about as wired as Barney Rubble.
See much better.
As long as your web pages can pass the MMPI everything you say is cool.
For a serious answer at the moment…
Most of the groups you described are, at best, niche markets and even then the concept of the people in those small markets are the concepts of younger people in their teens and early 20’s. The number of beat generation mothers who are still smoking French cigarettes and playing the bongos just isn’t enough to try to form a market for - at least not in the mainstream. While there are, no doubt, neo-punk gothic technopagans reading Kerouac who also happen to be mothers, it’s not worth the efforts nor the money for mainstream markets to try to attract them with gifts designed for them. Certainly there are some smaller shops, websites and publications out there which will address what to get your mother for Mother’s Day (though I don’t know of any, not being a member of any of those groups) or else you can do as I do and know that those websites you mention are full of trash anyway and simply buy your mom a gift based on your knowledge of her interests and likes; not what Yahoo! tells you to buy.
Options’ post translated to Jive:
4 some serious answa’ at da damn moment…
Most o’ da damn groups yo’ ass described be, at best, niche markets an’ even
den da concept o’ da damn sucka’s in dose-dair little-ass markets be da damn
concepts o’ jailbaita’ sucka’s in deir teens an’ early-like 20’s. Word to yo’
mama. Da numba’ o’ whup’ generashun
mamas who be still puffin’ French canca’ stix an’ playin’ da bongos plum aint
‘nuff t’ try t’ form some market 4 at laist not in da mainstraim. While dair be, no doubt, neo-punk gothic technopagans eyeballin’ Kerouac who also go down t’ be mamas, it be not wort’ da damn efforts nor da braid 4 mainstraim markets t’ try t’attract them wit’ gifts designed 4 them. Certain-like dair be some kinda’ little-assa’ shops, websites an’ publicashuns out dair which will address whut t’ git yo’ mama 4 Mama’s Day (down low, though I duzn’t know o’ no, not bein’ some memba’ o’ no o’ dose-dair groups) o’ else yo’ ass kin do as I do an’ know dat dose-dair websites yo’ ass menshun be full o’ trash anyway an’ simply steal yo’ mom some gift based on yo’ knowledge o’ ha’ interests an’
likess; not whut Yahoo! tells yo’ ass t’ steal.
Sorry, that was Jophiel’s post.
See what you got us into, waterj2!
As one of those neo-pagan goth punk mommies, I agree that all of those gift suggestions are horrific.
My kids aren’t old enough to pick their own presents, so Mr Lunasea does all the shopping. He does ok without having to resort to the trash the flower/gift sites push.
Those suggestions are for brainless people who can’t be bothered to make any effort. As for my own mom, she wouldn’t like any of that crap either. I make most of my own presents for her and she loves it.
Are you looking for better suggestions or just getting it off your chest?
A woman does not lose 40 IQ points because she has a baby. Nor does she start dressing and thinking like a woman from a fifties sitcom. You can’t tell these things by reading Internet mother’s day gift suggestions - that’s all. In the same way a lot of people are uncomfortable with their parents’ sex lives, Internet people seem uncomfortable with the fact their mothers can read books by Richard Dawkins or Carl Sagan etc. Or that maybe they have always struggled to find a use for flowers. I didn’t mean to concentrate on sub-cults. I have to take the blame for the first two or three replies (and that they now have FBI links). It’s just the way I type.
G. Nome
Just having some fun with you. Glad you didn’t that the wrong way.
No. This is a simple reply, and I don’t need to use the preview. Yah, right.
Why don’t you use your prefix? Many people ask this question, I know I do.