Now this implies that Santa is a short-tempered, grumpy old sod who makes rude suggestions to innocent angels. And that is not true. The whole thing was a cultural misunderstanding…
It was christmas eve, and things were getting difficult in Mission Control. “Santa, we have navigation issues and fog pretty much everywhere, and there is a busload of kids stuck in the snow on the Afghan border we can’t locate. What are we going to do. We’ll never get presents to them.”
At that moment, the door opens and in walks the little angel with a huge Christmas tree. “Hey Santa me old china, take a butchers at this. I found it in the forest when I popped out for a jimmy riddle. I stuck tinsel on it, balls and lights and everything.”
Santa looked at the tree, and an idea formed in his mind. “Go find that young reindeer - Rudolf. I know his nose glows, at least we’ll be able to see where we are going. And you, little angel. I need to you to do something really special.”
“Whatever you need, Santa”
“Take that tree and stick it up the Khyber Pass”
And that is how the angel got on top of the Christmas tree.
A guy sits down at his table in a fancy restaurant, and orders Eggs Benedict. Then he tells the waiter he wants them served on a chrome hubcap.
“Sir,” says the waiter, “This is a fine dining establishment. We serve our Eggs Benedict on fine china, not on chrome hubcaps.”
“I’m the customer,” the guy says, “and if I ask for my Eggs Benedict to be served to me on a chrome hubcap, then I expect them to be served to me on a chrome hubcap.”
“I’ll have to discuss this with the chef,” says the waiter.
A little while later the chef enters the dining room and says to the guy, “I’m to understand you want your Eggs Benedict served to you on a chrome hubcap?”
“That’s correct,” the customer says.
“Why do you want your Eggs Benedict served to you on a chrome hubcap?”
The customer responds, “Because there’s no plate like chrome for the hollandaise.” Rimshot.
