Oh please. They’ll have located Jimmy Hoffa and discovered incontrivertible evidence of the second gunman in Dallas before they find that.
Big, pink, rubbery, and can be used below the waist.
Can be used for entertainment, possibly.
One of those giant joke erasers? They bounce funny if you get 'em to land on their end just right.
A small Frisbee?
A hot water bottle?
A water weinie?
A kneepad?
And no, I don’t want it.
Wait a second! You have fleas in your drawers? 
An extremely small life raft?
Nope to all except it is definitely used for entertainment.
BTW, just so y’all know, this is my first post using my new 'puter! WooooHooooooooo!
Oh, and DRY? Come 'er so’s I can smack ya around a bit.
(because two reasonably intelligent adults are sitting here scratching trenches into our heads…)
Does it inflate?
Can it be used ABOVE the waist?
Would you use it for entertainment in public? Or in the privacy of your own home?
Is it a girlie thing?
Is it a big pink rubber CD player?
Yes to all except a girlie thing.
Nope, my big rubber CD player is purple.
Is it one of those skip-it things? The one with a counter.
Big pink balloon?
Beach ball?
Blow up doll?
Otto?
Pink pogo stick?
One of those spikey foot massager things that you roll with you foot?
A whoopie coushion?
It has to be a whoopie cushion because its bigger than a deck of cards,is rubbery and pink,you sit on it so its used below the waist,and when used correctly can be quite entertaining. Am I right?
TA-DA!
It is a whoopie cushion. That was just too damn easy! 
Send me your address and I’ll mail it to ya.
No thanks,I already have one laying around somewhere. You could give it to someone else.
Okay, but I have to say that no one can have too many whoopie cushions.
I don’t have any whoopee cushions. Might it possibly become mine??
Of course! No one should be without a whoopie cushion! Send me your address and I’ll mail it to you.
(I’m keeping my high tech self-inflating cushion, so don’t worry about me).
Um, so you have anything risque?