That’s right, the one, the only…
Carry on, nothing else to see.
Anal Mary? I don’t get it…
You GOTTA remember Anal Mary. She’s the weirdo with the super exlusive “date me, but only if you’re my perfect little bitchboy” page.
Whatchoo talkin’ 'bout, Willis? Stop taking them drugs, MrC! Who the hell is Anal Mary?
Oh no–I see below me that porcupine has probably beaten me to this. . .
Folks, we have got to mess with this woman. It’s easy to find her stupid “signal words” if you just view the page source and search for the italic tags. Someone, please, knock her off that oh-so-very-high horse…
Heh. She was on the radio last night. According to her, she has received over 5,000 responses, but only 12 have followed all her instructions to the letter. I’m surprised more haven’t, if just to check her out in person. But then again maybe everyone else has a life.
I wonder if our very own Jimmy Nipples got anywhere?
…ahhh!!! To think I rated her a 4!!! Gahh… they should have “personalityornot”
She was on the radio??
Geez, first that web page, then “amihotornot” and now she’s on the radio! Why doesn’t she just do like that blonde woman in LA (Angelyne, or whatever her name is), and be done with it?
So, what station was Anal Mary on?
Her website has only gotten weirder.
I wonder what percentage of her respondants are doing it purely out of amusement…
If she doesn’t work, how does she maintain that phoneline and website?
I looked over her website, but it just got stranger and stranger with her demands and expectations. I could only guess what drove her to seek such a strict idea of a mate.
At first I thought this has got to be a joke. But if she is on the radio, it skews the whole theory that it’s an ex- boyfriend or something like that.
It is my humble opinion that this woman is just nuts. However, if you disagree with me just reply to this thread and I will outline a 5 step program detailing how to contact me. I require a minimum of 24 hour’s notice to allow me to determine if I will need to wash my hair. The approximate procedure will be as follows.
Go to Middletown Public Library and check out a book to be named later.
On a specified page there will be a phrase that seems out of context with the rest of the paragraph. It will give a clue as to the next of 15 books that will need to be checked out, full unabridged versions and read completely. A book report may or may not be required so it would behoove you to follow my instructions to the letter. If you use Cliff’s Notes it will not contain all the “magic” words and I will know. I have ways…
You will obtain these words in order specified and then compose a letter by cutting and pasting the script in a format which will be specified in a location that will be apparent after you finish reading all the books.
You will address said letter to The Romantic Mermaid using a size 10 envelope. No deviations from specified size will be tolerated. Correct postage is required.
You will insert aforementioned letter as far into own rectal cavity as far as anatomy permits and you will sit quietly in the corner until I contact you.
You know, I always knew there was stuff I would never “get” in the culture in which I live. This phenomenon is the best possible example I can think of to demonstrate it. I could not read Mary’s web page. I don’t think I got much past the first page. I only noticed how long it was because of the scroll bar.
I could not spend thirty seconds listening to Mary on the radio, or watching her on TV. If she was actually present in the room, I would try very hard to be polite to her until the very first opportunity came up that would allow me to leave.
So, what is the thrill in responding to her? How is she funny? Because her dementia is obviously so self designed, and voluntary it is hard for me to even feel pity for her. Who are these pathetic people who actually succeeded in pleasing her? What are they thinking?
I don’t get it. Any of it. I would read six-month-old stock quotes for longer than I would read her . . . stuff. (Keep in mind I don’t normally even read current stock quotes.) The Messier Catalog is more stimulating. I don’t think it is funny. I can’t even think of it as sad. It’s someone else’s bad doodling.
Way out of this loop, and not distressed by it.
Tris
It’s so funny how she tries to conceal her “signal words” to ensure that potential suitors read her dribblings rather than just doing a search. Witness the phrases I’ve unearthed by searching for the italic tag (each of these is from a different article):
So, putting the signal words together from the top and ignoring the repetition of the last two, we have: “I want to try to learn to please you on your terms.” Y’all feel free to toy with her obviously damaged psyche now.
Hmmm, ok. Where’s the “Very Vaguely Creepy” thread when you need it?
I’m just wondering how she expects to enforce this condition.
“As a sign of devotion, you will voluntarily submit to having a webcam superglued to your hand. I’m not always at my computer, but I will be recording you.”