You’ve been granted the ability to be a guitar God for eight minutes. You can be on stage with any band (transported back in time to play with now-defunct bands, even!) in front of thousands of screaming, lighter-lighting fans.
The spotlight’s on you. What song will it be?
I guess I’ll do Comfortably Numb by Pink Floyd, because it has two awesome solos in it. That just edges out “Couldn’t Stand the Weather” or basically anything else by Stevie Ray Vaughn.
And you …?
“We are here for this – to make mistakes and to correct ourselves, to withstand the blows and to hand them out.” Primo Levi
A few notable moments from the rock critic in me…
[ul][li]Dylan plugged in for the first time[/li][li]Hendrix doing the “Stag Spangled Banner” at Woodstock[/li][li]Paul Simonon of The Clash the moment his bass impacted the stage on the cover of London Calling[/li][li]Tony Iommi the first time he played the opening riff from “Paranoid” onstage[/li][li]A session guy at Sun Studios in the early ‘50s[/li][li]James Hetfield in some shitty small club in 1983 playing “The Four Horsemen”[/li][li]Prince. Anytime. Just to see what it would feel like[/li][li]Eddie Hazel about to rip into anything off of Maggot Brain[/li][li]Ace Frehley during the recording of Alive at Detroit’s Cobo Hall[/li][li]Helios Creed during one of the rare live shows he did with Damon Edge as the criminally underrated Chrome[/li][li]Greg Ginn or John Doe (from Blak Flag and X respectively) as shown in the movie Decline Of Western Civilization[/li][li]Frank Zappa any fucking time[/li][li]Lou Reed at the first Velvet Underground show[/li][li]Robert Johnson in the last show he did before he died[/li][li]Wayne Kramer when he recorded “Kick Out The Jams” for their debut disc[/li][li]Johnny Ramone playing “Blitzkrieg Bob” at CBGB’s[/li][li]Steve Jones at the last Sex Pistols show in San Francisco[/ul][/li]Okay… That’s way more than enough frequent flyer miles on the ol’ time machine!
Oooh. Lessee…Allman Brothers. Jessica & Little Martha. Don’t know if that’s quite eight minutes, but I’ll sacrifice a little just for the opportunity.
I just asked my husband what he’d do (he’s an unknown guitar God). He says he doesn’t know. I’ll let him think on it. He knows too much to take a decision like this lightly.
Cristi, Slayer of Peeps
I made my husband join a bridge club. He jumps next Tuesday.
Better yet, there in Manchester at the “Royal Albert Hall” show, right after the guy in the audience yells, “Judas!”, and Bob instructs the band to “play fucking loud”. One of the defining moments of rock and roll, if you ask me.
(Some people think that’s not actually what Bob said, but that’s what it sounds like to me, and the band does in fact play fucking loud as they go into “Like A Rolling Stone”. So that’s what I like to think. )
Dr. J
“Seriously, baby, I can prescribe anything I want!” -Dr. Nick Riviera
[HiJAK]
Hmmm… well my ego will shine through here.
I am a guitar god. I have had my moments on guitar in front of audiences. I like to make my own solos. I don’t play other peoples solos, I write and improvise all my own material. One day I promise you guys will hear my work. I am only 21 but have spent the past 7 years of my life eating and sleeping guitar. If you want to become a guitar god, dump your friends/boyfriend/ girlfriend/wife/husband, become obsessed with the guitar, devote your existance to it learn everything you can… learn more… practice…practice… After many many hard years of work and devotion you can be a guitar god too! All the hard work is starting to pay off for me. I am getting to levels of playing I used to only dream of. But it sure is cool when you stun people speechless with your own stuff. I love it![/HiJAK]
If at first you don’t succeed you’re about average.
Ahem. I’m only going to say this because you’re young. Yes, you do need to woodshed. But dumping everyone isn’t necessary. You might want to try a)not looking for anyone while you are in the process of becoming a Guitar God, or b)finding someone who supports the notion of you becoming a Guitar God.
Trust me on this one, dear. I am married to an Unknown-For-Now-Guitar-God, and I support everything he does. I understand that his music is first. He is a wonderful husband and father, but he must play. It’s like breathing. I knew this when I met him, I knew this when I married him, I knew this when our two beautiful children were born. It’s working for us. Someday, you’ll hear his music too.
Silo, doing it alone can be good. But it’s nice if you can find someone to go through it with you. Someone to come home to when you have a crappy gig (or an awewsome one). Someone to keep track of the piles of originals you’re writing, and someone to tell you how those originals sound. Someone to float you a few bucks when you need picks/strings/blank tapes/tubes/a completely new rig altogether.
Best of luck to you, Silo! I have faith in you, really.
[Hijacker Hat: OFF]
Cristi, Slayer of Peeps
I made my husband join a bridge club. He jumps next Tuesday.
Let’s see. I would play a piece I have already played (and well, I might add) by Leo Brower called “Cubin Landscape With Rain.” It is a guitar quartet and quite awesome in its own rights. I would want to play first guitar (which I also played before) with the LA Guitar Quartet. Perhaps that would influence my classical music career in a positive way.
