For purposes of this poll, it matters not if the person you were having the affair with was married or not: only that they were in a committed relationship with a third person which precluded their doing whatever they did with you.
I’m not making this a public poll for reasons left as an exercise for the class. If anyone wants to talk about a specific instance, though, I don’t mind.
Ye,but her marriage was failing before I met her.
Yes, I have been. A couple of times, regrettably. All of them occurred in my late teens/very early 20’s, when I didn’t give a crap about anything other then my own pleasure and happiness.
Was this supposed to be a poll?
Nope. I’ve been the other guy in non-serious relationships, but never with a woman in a committed relationship.
Yeah, but there were, like 19 options on account of me being anal & stuff. Plus I was distracted by work. 
It’s up now.
Oh hey, there it is. All righty then. 
Yup. It wasn’t a marriage, but it was a long term committed relationship. I was the only affair she ever had. They split up a couple years afterwards. I knew the guy and didn’t think much of him or the way he treated her. Plus, I was in my 20’s and a sexy girl was throwing herself at me. I doubt I could have resisted if I wanted to.
Well, in college I fooled around with this girl who had a rocky relationship with her boyfriend. They were sort of “off-again” when she and I got together, and we didn’t actually have sex, and then she dumped me to get back together with him, so I don’t think it counts and voted No.
Yeah. I didn’t used to care about whether either one of us (me or him) had a “committed” partner. After all, I didn’t want to steal him from her, I just wanted to borrow him for an evening, right? And if neither my BF or his GF found out, then we could have our fun and there’d be no hurt feelings, right? It made the sex even more delicious, to know that he wanted me so bad he’d betray someone he loved for me…or to know that I was smart enough to pull the wool over my BF’s eyes.
I know. Stupid stuff. Needless to say, I really had no self-esteem at that point other than what was based in my sexuality.
Eventually, I developed a sense of ethics and realized how selfish that was, and stopped. This contributed to an increase in my self-esteem.
Same here. I also considered it a challenge and a bit of a coup to be with someone who was in a committed relationship. I cringe when I think about it now.
Ditto. We only met in person until after she divorced, but what we had until then was definitely a relationship of sorts. Not my finest hour but there it is.
I have been, and I was in a committed relationship at the same time as well, so we were ‘both’ the other woman.
And it was truly the most miserable episode in my life and not to be recommended or repeated.
On the plus side, I lost about 20lbs.
Never cheated, Never been the other guy.
There was a time when I was 16, one specific gal, that I would have but the conditions were never right. In a way I wish I had because that would have hurt my girlfriend so badly that she would have dumped me and I wouldn’t have ended up marrying (and subsequently divorcing) her 10 years later. Of course, if I hadn’t married (and subsequently divorced) her, then I’d never have met evlkitty. So I guess in a much larger sense, I’m very glad I didn’t. Life is so complicated.
Yes.
For a period of a little over two weeks, I was involved with a married woman. Someone I’d known for years who had always been interested in me, and her marriage was always a ridiculous mess that she was just afraid to get out of, but I was married. Then my marriage fell apart after my wife fell in love with another man, and I was suddenly single. And here was this woman who was attracted to me and wanted to be with me. That felt really good to me at the time.
I dove in, briefly. But at the point where we were actually going to have sex (and I really mean, at THE point), that nagging feeling I’d had about this being really wrong finally broke through, and I cut it off. I wish I’d had the sense to do so before I’d gotten started, though.
Had the chance to be the other man recently with my ex. She called me at 2 in the morning asking to come over. I said sorry it ain’t working out with the guy you just bought a place with, but no way. Don’t call me again.
I was the other woman with a guy friend of mine. We had been friends for years and he had been with his girlfriend for years. I got it in my head I was way better for him than her and that he’d leave her to be with me, blah blah blah.
I was 19, he was 20. I was mad for a long time and sad. She never found out, to the best of my knowledge. I felt guilty after I grew up a little for a long time, until I found out they got married. So that helped me: at least I didn’t screw up their couplehood.
He and I stayed friends for a little, then we stopped. We then made up as friends only but now she hated me, although she didn’t know. i drifted away from them and just got back in touch with him and the subject of “us” never comes up and it’s not an elephant in the room at all. They were together for like a decade, including married for a few years, although they’ve since divorced.
I would like to think i would never do that again and if I had a time machine, I would act differently. I try to be a good person and not do the wrong thing, and this is one of the only things I really regret in life and feel that I did something truly wrong knowlingly.
I refuse to date someone in a relationship. Imho, a person willing to do that is willing to do that to me as well.
Pretty much my story, but we did, so I voted “yes”.
Loooonnnnng time ago, now.