I have crush on this co worker and I sensed that he likes me because he complimented me and the way he looks at me. I could sense an attraction between us.
I was expecting him to make move at some point but my hope was crushed when he told another co worker that he hasn’t been coming to work because his girlfriend is sick so he has been staying at home taking care of her. The lady told us when he left the room.:o
I felt embarrassed since I probably just read too much into things and imagined all of it. How can he be truly interested if he already has a gf?I posted a thread about him on another forum and they were all telling me to ask him out for coffee and make move. I am glad that I was too shy to make a move. I cant imagine how awkward it could have been :if I had made a move eek:
So have you ever liked someone then found out they are already in relationship? Did you eventually get over them?
Every day there are many people around the world who are falling in love with someone who’s already married or engaged or in a relationship. It happens perhaps millions of times every year, all around the world.
Don’t make move on this one. True, most people have a Schrödinger’s girlfriend/boyfriend, and will be wooed away if you can present a better prospect. But this guy stayed away from work to nurse his. That’s pretty sweet and you need to respect their happiness.
I’m sorry it turned out this way for you. That’s unfortunate. :-/
Yes, it has happened to me. The guy, who was extremely kind and friendly to everyone, particularly to me, turned out to be engaged. …Thankfully, I never revealed that I had developed feelings for him.
I asked a coworker out for coffee a couple months ago, only to be told that she already had a boyfriend. I actually think that she was lying to me, too, because she’d told me on Valentine’s Day that she was single. But hey, if I take her at her word then she’s taken. As they say, c’est la vie.
I think the moral of these stories - my case and the OP - is that it’s never a good idea to pursue romantic endeavors with coworkers, no matter how “available” they ostensibly seem to be. Just don’t do it.
This last link may seem like it’s irrelevant but you go on to talk about your “crush” which I can only assume to be a different crush you had on your doctor friend discussed in the first link.
So what’s going on with you? Are you playing games with us or what?
Ok I thought this was a discussion board .So I am not allowed to rant and post any discussion about topics I want? Sometimes I just want to hear other people prespective and opinions.
Yes, it happened to me, a long time ago (1959 to be exact). In the fall of 1958, I found myself teaching calculus as a TA, although I was technically still an undergraduate (but taking 3 graduate courses and one lone English course needed to graduate). There was a girl in the class that attracted me. It didn’t hurt that she was earning an easy A. So when the term ended I asked her out. She accepted and we dated heavily for a month or so. Then one evening I went, with a male friend to a movie theater that had become an art theater (although, oddly enough, it had been the theater where ten years earlier I had been habitue of the Saturday matinees). I still recall the movies I saw. It was a double bill of Phantom of the Opera and The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari (a kind of surreal horror movie). When I got up to go the lobby at intermission I found the girl and a good friend of mine sitting directly behind me and my friend. I was shocked to say the least. I greeted them and then went to the lobby. Then she came out to the lobby to explain that she still wanted to date me. Well, until the summer she dated both of us. I’m not certain if the other guy even knew this. At some point during that summer, she suddenly broke off with both of us. I was devastated. I did make one more attempt to reconnect, but she wasn’t having any of it.
Follow up: Then her best friend came to see me one day, obviously trying to promote herself. I was not attracted to her at all, but she ended up marrying the other guy and they are still married and now retired to Florida.
If that person is your friend, you can be attracted to them and not do anything about it. Be happy that they are happy.
I have a good friend who I am extremely attracted to. He’s attractive, smart, athletic, geeky, intellectually curious, and funny. He also has a wonderful and lovely wife who’s a good match for him and two kids. I’m happy that they are a happy and well-adjusted family. I’d never do anything to jeopardize it, because it would be ethically shitty.
The key is to accept that the person is in a relationship and not moon over them. Go about your life and date, don’t sit around.
/lecture
(This lecture has been brought to you buy the letter S. S is for “spinster”, which these days just means that your footloose days are extended a little longer than other people’s!)
So to those who had a similar misfortune, did you eventually get over the other person? Unfortunately I am still crushing on him despite finding out about his gf.I thought I was going to lose interest when I found out but haven’t.
He was supposed to work on my floor today but he called in and was disapointed when he didn’t show up.I was really looking forward to work with him. He hasnt been coming to work that much so presumably things are still not gping well in his personal life.Ughh I wish of I could get over this annoying crush and become indifferent towards him.This really sucks
Not exactly a crush because I knew they were not available but yes many times. I just suffered silently. In my early 20’s I dated a married woman and saw the pain it caused and vowed I would never do that again. Sometimes it seems like all the good ones are allready taken, the key word being allready taken.
So long as you have a reasonable chance of getting fresh ideas and opinions, you bet. After three or four threads on the exact same subject (from both sides of the issue: feeling & deterring an unwanted crush; kudos for being open about it), any new threads on the same subject aren’t really new threads any more. Most of your previous threads are recent enough that if you wanted to talk about the situation some more, you should just post there.
If they are a decent human being, and the chemistry remains, of course you remain attracted to them. You have two choices, settle into something where you can be their friend - there will probably always be a little bit of “if things were to change” back there - or try and cut them out of your life if its really too distracting - difficult with coworkers and you are likely to really hurt yourself job switching every time some cute guy turns out to be married.
I have a former work friend - great guy - we started working together fifteen years ago. And there was definitely mutual chemistry. But I’m married. He’s married. We hung out together, enjoyed each others company. When his marriage went South, I took a firm back seat at work - my marriage was still fine, but he didn’t need that distraction and they got the marriage back into a not immediately falling apart state. I eventually went to work somewhere else (not because of him), and we are still in touch. When his kids were both in college, the marriage did fall apart for him (not a surprise) and I had one of those weird feeler lunches with a good friend where he subtly took the temperature of the state of my marriage (which was fine), and shortly thereafter changed his facebook status and started seeing a lovely woman.
At work in particular there are always going to be people for whom you have strong feelings - they may be “can barely stand to be in the same room with them” or they may be of the “I wish he’d ravish me on the table right now” or something else (you may think you have a bitch of a female coworker, or that someone is so silly you can’t stand it. I have a coworker right now driving me nuts because she’s having a nervous breakdown over her job. Nice woman, I’m not close with her, but I empathize so much it impacts my own health/job - it isn’t her that I find distracting, its her emotional state). You have to, as much as possible, strive to be professional and civil to everyone. Sometimes, that will be VERY hard.
Its often best to keep coworkers at arms length for both romance and friendship if you have a hard time with bringing your personal life into work.
What you have here isn’t a cute little crush. You’re straight up obsessing over this guy.
Not only are you obsessing about it here, but as was pointed out, you posted the exact same thing on Yahoo Answers two months prior to starting your “Is my coworker interested?” thread here.
And what really sets my BS meter going, is that in both threads you stated, “Today I decided to wear make up and look nice since I knew I was working on his floor.I am CNA and he is a Nurse …” even though those two threads are a month and a half apart. Link
So when did this thing really happen? They can’t BOTH be true.
Juxtapose that with the “How do I get my coworker to stop flirting with me?” thread and it makes me wonder what’s really going on with you.
Look, you already said you were moving “on to the next” in your first thread, but here you are again three threads later still obsessing over him.
If your really serious about moving on and getting over this guy, my might try stop making threads about him.
Just to clary something, the other thread about an older co worker flirting with me is a totally different situation with a different co worker that just happened at the same work place.This thread is a reference to the first thread I posted about a co worker who I thought liked me and allot of people told me that he seemed interested and I should ask out for a cofee but then I found out that he has a gf.The reason why I posted this thread is because I just wanted to see if other people experinced the same thing and how they delt with it.Just interested hearing other people opinions
The other thread about a co worker flirting with me is about an older co worker who is old enough to be my father and has grown kids.He is also married.I have no interest in him whatsover hence why I posted a thread asking advice on how to reject his advances.
This one that I posted before asking if he is intrested in me , is a different co worker that I am crushing on.He is the same age as me but I found out he has a gf.They are totally different people and different situation that just happened at work.just to clear things out
