Have You Ever Seen a Celebrity Drunk?...or Naked?... or...

Rollerblading? Or slapping their spouse? Or alive? Or dead? Or on TV, film, or stage?

Tell us all about it. In as much detail as you can manage.

Don’t forget to share all your thoughts and feelings as it was happening and how you think and feel about it now.

Also, discuss in depth how this celebrity would fare in a fight v. Batman, or any other Superhero, or any other person, animal, or inanimate object.
I once saw that stagehand, Pat Farmer, from the David Letterman show walking on the boardwalk. I thought, “huh.” I think Batman would take him. I think Pat would win v. a shoe.

Have you ever seen a celebrity driving in their car?

What Celebrities Have You Gone to the Bathroom With?

Oh yeah, Ralph Nader.
He was in town a few years ago.
Drunk and naked!
Ya should’ve seen him!

just kidding; wanted to give you guys a moment :wink:

I saw Woody Harrelson naked plenty of times when we were roommates, but he wasn’t famous at the time.

A few weeks ago, I saw Graham Norton, who’s well-known in the UK, completely off his chops at a gay club in London.

I’ve seen a whole bunch of musicians drunk off their asses. The two most memorable occasions were:

a) Allen Collins from Lynyrd Skynyrd (post-plane crash) inexplicably showed up one night at a hole-in-the wall joint just outside Hooversville, Somerset County, PA to play a few songs with a band made up of several of my friends, who at the time covered a lot of LS material (although if I never again hear some drunk yahoo in a flannel shirt yelling ‘Free Bird’!, or the goddam song itself, it’ll be too soon). Mr. Collins had a bottle of Jack Daniels placed in front of him for his personal use just after arrival. Two hours later it was gone, and so was he, apparently.

b) Paul Westerberg of The Replacements. They were scheduled to play Houston’s Lawndale Art Center sometime back in the '80’s, when it was located in some nondescript industrial park. As I walked up to the door, I noticed an obviously toasted individual in a filthy black t-shirt laying comatose in the mud by the entrance. “Wow”, thinks I, “that boy got started early”. A few minutes later, light dawned as to who he was when when the mudman staggered to his feet and took a wobbly position at the microphone. The small but energetic crowd of wannabe punks quickly took exception to Mr. Westerberg’s inability to clearly enunciate his lyrics, or even remain standing for more than a few seconds, and they began hurling folding chairs at the stage. I think the band made it though three songs before the organizers pulled the plug and the police were called to disperse the crowd.

John Prine was staggeringly drunk when I saw him at the Mosque here in Richmond. He managed to get sort of propped up at the mic, but couldn’t get through an entire song. He did have the courtesy to apologize to the crowd before he walked, stumbled, and/or was carried off the stage. We didn’t through chairs, as they were bolted to the floor.

Many’s the time I’ve seen a celebrity drunk or naked. Why shouldn’t I be naked or drunk whilst I flip the channels? And why should Ming-Na Wen or Jennifer Tilly care which of my parts I am or am not touching while I’m watching the Hollywood Home version of the World Poker Tour? James Woods and Daniel Baldwin didn’t seem to mind. It’s really none of their business.

“through” chairs?

Damn, I need more sleep.

I saw Eric Burdon at the Roundhouse in London. He was so drunk(?) that the guitarist of his backing band was telling him the lyrics to things like Don’t Let Me Be Misunderstood. Since he was one of my heroes I could have happily stangled him. Worst live performance ever.

Hell I could have even strangled him.

Does the internet count? 'Cause if the internet counts, I’ve seen lots of celebrities naked. :smiley:

I watched a guest lecture by Hunter Tompson. They brought out a stool, a glass and a bottle of Chivas Regal. He came out and spoke and then answered questions till the bottle ran out.

I saw Orlando Bloom, who was naked and drunk and, I believe, pregnant, giving the late Rosalind Russell (who was dead but every bit as charming as you’d think she’d be) a piggy-back ride through the ladies room at a local IHOP recently. Cloris Leachman kept shouting at them through the stall door and threatening to have her friend and then spouse Corey Haim evict them, but the IHOP manager (played by either Breckin Meyer or Sophia Loren, I couldn’t tell) kept breaking plates on the floor until they all rollerbladed out of there, whereupon Burl Ives and Ernest Tubbs finally got their blueberry and nut pancakes (which, being dead, they didn’t really eat that much of, but did enjoy talking about how drunk Guich Koock once got at Christian Slater’s Smack&Tupperware Party).

Ok, real celebrities that I’ve seen out and about (I don’t think that’s the actual point of this thread, but what the hey):

Jonathan Frakes and his wife (Jeanie Francis?) in a London pub sharing a drink and a quiet moment. I’m fairly sure I was the only one in there who knew who he was, and I didn’t know who she was until my wife told me later and I googled her name.

Richard Belzer getting take out in Baltimore.

Elliot Gould walking down the street in Cincinnati.

Jay Leno driving his old motorcycle (maybe an Indian) to the Comedy Store in Hollywood. He was greeting everyone waiting on line like an old friend. This was way before he had his own late night show.

Joelly Richardson (from 101 Dalmations and other films). I asked her out. She was in 10th grade when I was a senior at high school. She shot me down cold (how was I to know she was the daughter of famous people? I thought she was just some underclassmen with a Brit accent).

Corey Dillon eating a steak with what I have to assume was his nephew or some other young relative at The Precinct in Cincinnati.

Charles S. Dutton walking along the Inner Harbor on a nice, sunny spring day in Baltimore. He had two young girls with him, one on each arm. It was not that crowded that day and we were filming a video for work so I got him to say “hi” on camera with the two girls still on his arm. Don’t have that video anymore, as far as I know, so he’s past the statute of limitations.

Paul O’Neill, former Red and Yankee, eating dinner at Daveed’s in Cincinnati with a friend and their dates. They were at the next table and my wife has a huge crush on him, but we didn’t say hello or anything. I don’t like to bother folks just because they’re famous.

Sat next to Cris Collinsworth once on a flight from Cincinnati to NYC. We didn’t talk, even though we’re both Florida alum.

Had the above Collinsworth and Boomer Esaiason cut in front of us in line once at a Cincy pizza place. I was more annoyed than excited.

Talked to Pat Borders once before an Oriole’s v Blue Jays game. This was, IIRC, about a year or so before he won the World Series MVP. My wife grew up his hometown and that’s why he even gave me the time of day. They used to go trick-or-treating together.

I’m sure there are a couple of more that I don’t recall. It’s really not a big freakin’ deal, and none of these people is all that important or probably all that interesting to talk to, anymore than anyone here.

I’ve seen Jeff Buckley DRUNK drunk drunk, and Billy Idol naked–twenty years ago; HOT hot hot.

Well, they weren’t naked, and I don’t know if they were drunk, but I’ve seen Janeane Garafalo and Weird Al in public, making out (seperately, with their repsective partners, otherwise that really would be a find!)

Janeane was in the corner of a club, five feet from me, sucking some serious face with her boyfriend and Al was at Niagra Falls, making out with some hot blonde. Go figure.

TwistofFate tells a nice story about being in the same pub as the Irish Taoiseach (Prime Minister) Bertie Ahern. He is a regular in Fagan’s in Drumcondra Dublin if anybody wants to see him.

Twisty was in the toilet having a piss and Bertie comes in and stands beside him and starts his business. We were having a contentious referendum at the time. Twisty asked him how it was going and his reply was “Do you know sometimes I wish I could tell them all to fuck off” :smiley:

Niagara Falls?! Slo—

Oops, sorry, wrong thread . . .

If you’re not whooshing us, did you attend college in SE Indiana?

I went to the same college & my first two years were his last two.

The only celeb I’ve seen was Bruce Willis walking out of a bookstore. I pointed and said to the barista, “Hey, it’s Bruce Willis,” as a joke, because it was just some guy who looked like him. It took the barista about ten minutes to convince me that it really was him. When I found out why he was 'round here, it all made sense.

His ex was outside, and they were travelling separate vehicles. Neither looked naked, nor drunk, slapping anybody around.

My main regret is that when I passed him, I didn’t say, “Hey, it’s Mickey Rourke!” He may not have been amused; but I sure would have been.