Oh wow. I am so sorry. I think it’s awfully brave of you to share this. Thank you. I hope you are able to find peace and contentment and continue to be strong enough to resist acting on your attraction.
sometimes it ain’t even got no pussy.
Yes to both. Although in some cases it’s more like pondering than actual outright attraction. But I generally do what I’d do in other situations where I find a person attractive in one aspect but not another - I dismiss it as not potentially satisfying on more than one level.
I could see myself theoretically acting on it if the family member were either distant enough in relation or there was a huge supporting context, and likewise with someone of an inappropriate age if they were legal or there was a huge supporting context - but I’ve never happened to have been attracted enough on multiple levels to anyone of either category on enough levels for other factors to come into play.
I did once date someone ‘barely legal’ who was ten years younger than me, but there was no power disparity and their immaturity eventually overrode whatever attraction I had. Growing up I was attracted to my Dad’s stepson who I didn’t live with. Though nothing came of it, I wouldn’t have felt any kind of remorse over it.
That said i’m not too judgemental about what other people do. In some cases there is a potentially harmful power disparity but not always, and not inherently. These things are best looked at contextually and on a case by case basis rather than unilaterally.
I’d feel guilty for thinking my cousin out in Colorado is hot, but she’s only 5 days younger than me and we have to go back about 5 generations to have a common ancestor :-P.
Oh, and her first cousin had a crush on my brother for 15 years or so. terrible taste.
I haven’t been attracted to underage boys since I was underage myself. Just not my thing - I tend to prefer older men, with a few exceptions.
But hoo boy have I been attracted to a family member. I am another slut at heart, and I think several of my cousins are drop-dead gorgeous. I think my second cousin and I could practically be soulmates, but he and I are only a month and a half apart so that hardly counts. In different circumstances I might have been OK marrying him. As it is, the very very few times he asks me to do something, I do it. He asked me once to call my mom, after years of silence, and that weekend, I picked up the phone and called her.
That’s how I deal with it. Love them greatly, and deeply, in the relationship they are in.
As others have noted, this is not the kind of statement that folks tend to be comfortable with. Verboten to speak of.
Me, I was attracted to girls my own age back when I was a kid, and although for the most part my tastes have scaled up along with my age, the attraction to the younger kids didn’t all go away. Not toddlers & infants but prepubescent and intra-pubescent girls for sure. And saying so would probably be quite enough to cause lots of people to decide they would not want their kids to be in the same room with me. And to not want to be in the same room with me themselves.
I don’t know if nearly everyone had sexual feelings about (some of) their peers back when they were elementary-school kids, and that it’s just a totally taboo topic, or if it’s unusual to still feel the “ghost” of that attraction years later, or if in fact most people either did not feel much sexual attraction when they were kids or (and this seems weird to ME) they did but felt it towards adults instead of people their own age.
Oh, another thing. I absolutely, even as a straight female, see girls from, say 14 to 19, as very attractive. Come on - they are all budding and blooming. I also wonder how their puberty is going. Are they uncomfortable, going through it? Have they had their hands slapped away from masturbating all their lives, and suddenly sexuality is upon them and they don’t know how to handle it? Or were they raised to understand that sexuality and sensuality is a beautiful thing?
I wonder a lot. And I notice budding breasts. A lot of this is because my coming-of-age was less than pleasant, and I can’t help but empathize.
I once mentioned on here that my SO was “approaching the right age to ogle teenage girls”, that is, in his thirties, and that I didn’t have a problem with ogling. Someone else posted to say, “Is there ever a wrong age?” How true that is.
On kids. While I am pleased that pedophilia can be talked about now and that children can admit it without feeling like THEY are the ones in the wrong (as much), I have to admit I wish I’d never heard about it. Whenever I look at a kid now I feel a flash of guilt. I mean, looking at their little bodies and thinking how cute they are is not sexual. And yet I always always feel a flash of “That’s probably how pedos think.” Even though I feel nothing sexual at all. I feel icky, and I hate it, and if I could wipe all knowledge of pedophilia from my head forever, I might consider it.
Like many things, if you worry about it, you don’t have to worry about it. It’s the folks that do so with predatory intent that are the problem.
When does an attractive person BECOME attractive? 18? 14? 12? The bits and pieces of attraction are there from the start, it’s not like there’s some magic switch or chrysalis stage.
I look at my boys and what I feel is envy. They have Zero body fat. They have flexibility. They have unending energy. They have a physique I could never hope to attain.
Youth is wasted on the young. Humbug.
No, I opened a thread about “sexual attraction to family members/underage”, was prompted to remember an incident relevent to the thread, and mentioned it. I have not spent the last seven years obsessively dwelling on it. I mentioned that I am not fixated on pre-pubescent girls; it also happens that I am not a rapist or a molester.
But you sounded kind of fascinated by her. And you did call her a wanton female–that’s pretty creepy.
Mine goes up to 11.
You! Yes, you, reading this! You laughed, don’t deny it, I heard you through the intarwebz. You sick pervert, I’m calling the cops.
(Only posted as I was just denied the opportunity to do this one-liner in another thread where it would have been amusing)
Also, Freudian Slit and this thread make the best username/topic combo evar.
Yup. It’s gotten so I don’t actually have to make an interesting contribution. The name speaks for itself! 
Yes, that’s correct. I am attracted to females from birth through about age ten.
Do you think we need one?
Hm, that was a typo. It was supposed to say “active”, not "attractive.
That’s what I get for posting in a hurry, I guess.
While I appreciate the sentiment, I’ve never found NOT RAPING PEOPLE to be particularly challenging. Is that considered unusual among “normal” teliophiles?
I’m aware that some people tend to be uncomfortable with such statements, but I read through the rules and didn’t see anything about it spelled out when I signed up. They’ve left this thread up, and discussing this subject (and incestuous attraction) seems to be the entire point of its existence.
The studies I’ve seen on the matter suggest that in the general population of adult males, 88% show some attraction to prepubescent females, and from 20-33% experience greater arrousal to prepubescent stimuli than adult stimuli.
As for the sexuality of the kids themselves, the studies I’ve seen on that subject suggest that barring negative reinforcement from family, authority figures, etc. that’s fairly normal too.
What you need isn’t less knowledge. It’s more knowledge. I can tell you from personal experience that what you’re describing is not what pedophiles feel. Yes, I see that kids are cute just like you, but I also experience sexual arousal. That is a rather unmistakable difference, in my experience.
Twenty to thirty guys prefer to look at prepubescent females than adult women? I find that hard to believe–do you have any data? And 88% show some arousal to prepubescents? But don’t some guys just get hard…period? Like, sure, he might have gotten hard from that picture of an 8 year old girl, but maybe a herd of zebras, or a bouncing basketball, or the wind blowing right might have gotten him hard.
Sure, I can provide the studies. The 20% figure is from a self-reporting study that I don’t keep immediately on hand, but the 88 and 33 figures come from a study I have a link to.
There was one of those years ago IIRC and the poster in question got banned partially because of it. It am certainly not a moderator but I would guess it is probably not in someone’s best interest to express a sexual preference for small children in any context assuming that it is true. That isn’t a value judgement as long as it is never, ever acted on in any way because people generally can’t control their sexual thoughts. However, anyone that ever expressed that opinion to me in real life sure is hell isn’t going to be hanging around my young daughters.
So you’re saying we should probably avoid making another such thread and just leave such questions to PMs?
Which is odd because, statistically speaking:
Yeah, I was kind of being facetious. I don’t blame someone for having that attraction, but I kind of felt, like, “Wow, someone admitting to it?!” And I can’t really blame you for your attitude about your kids/an admitted pedophile. I mean, I think it would make any parent supremely uncomfortable.
ETA: Okay, but most non pedophiles aren’t SO hard up/desperate that they decide to rape kids. There’s got to be something special about someone who rapes a child even if they say that they would prefer adults.
What you may not realize is that rape is not a crime that has anything to do with sexual attraction. It’s about power. About hurting the other person and making them feel worthless. “Ordinary” heterosexual men rape children, the elderly, other men. Do you think all those oft referenced prison rapes are a result of gay inmates?
I’m not denying for one second that rapists are fucked up people regardless of their specific target, but no one rapes people because “they’re hard up/despirate”. That’s just not how it works. Would you like an FBI report on the subject?
Ok, “wanton” was an inaccurate and extremely poor choice of words. I never meant to imply that she was deliberately trying to entice anyone.
:o Can we just put this down and walk away now?