Haven't applied for a job in 20+ years--online assessements?

In My Humble Opinion (IMHO)
#1

Transitioning into retirement, leaving stress overload behind. Want nothing to do with offices & all that that entails.

Considering retail associate–cashier, whatever. Before you shriek in horror, trust me, I know. People are assholes. My current job is as marketing director for a small chain of local retail businesses. I do hear and handle customer BS on occasion, and of course, had my fill of it in high school/college/first jobs etc. So I know. It just seems to be a way to do something different and something I can leave there when I leave. So, OK.

But these assessment tests. I don’t seem to be able to pass them. Seen one? They’re pretty routine and it’s easy to suss out the “correct” answer, right? Some questions are harder like “I never get irritated at work ever.” Um, then you wouldn’t be human. I’ve offered myself for any shift incl. weekends, evenings & holidays, part time, but man, unless I figure this out, I’ll be shoveling shit somewhere like I do now.

Any clues? I keep getting “based on you assessment test we have found other more qualified applicants.”

#2

I feel like every website has contradictory tips on how to pass those, so take any advice with a grain of salt. One thing I’ve heard is to use “Strongly Disagree” and “Strongly Agree” as much as possible. Don’t use “Somewhat.”

#3

DummyGladHands- Its not the test, its you…

Unfortunately you might fall into the trap of being OVER qualified. I seriously doubt you are failing the assessment tests. You are applying for entry level jobs, and some hiring managers might see you as a flight risk, ready to leave at the first opportunity to work for a higher wage. I’ve also experienced that, and I’ve passed on candidates for that reason as well. Even if their fears are unfounded, and you will be the most prompt, polite, professional employee they could ever get their grubby little hands on, they would pass you up for someone not as attuned to the rights of workers, someone who would take their crappy management, crappy hours and dismal pay because they don’t know any better.

Keep plugging away. Have you considered call centers? I know you wanted to stay out of offices That’s one area that I know they would hire someone nearing retirement for all the right reasons! Or would suggesting Home Depot, being among the people, be something you would be interested in?

#4

Thanks, yes, Home Depot (and taking back all the crummy stuff I’ve said about them over the years) :rolleyes: has already offered me a PT position and seemed happy to have a retiree.

And I thought about that as well–I mean putting down my current wage looks weird next to what they pay. But I try to fit in there on the application somewhere- “retiree, looking to transition into PT work.” That may be for naught since I’m sure computers scan these apps and tests and rarely a live person.

#5

You’re far too good for such roles so they filter you out. Have you considered looking for non-executive director type roles?

#6

Those assessment tests are another way for companies to reject highly-qualified candidates because they don’t fit into the box that the computer says they should.

I would dearly love to know who came up with the concept. It takes a special kind of idiot to think that those tests actually help the company.

#7

It takes a specific type of person to be happy in a retail job. They’re trying to hire intellectually uncurious toadies, who won’t take offense to asshole customers treating them like shit, who will report every type of theft no matter how insignificant (THOSE PENS AND NAPKINS ARE COMPANY PROPERTY!), who will help a customer while clocked out without filing a wage complaint, who will toe the company line in their dreams, who will unironically keep smiling at customers while management is raining bullshit down all over them. That’s who the assessment tests are targeting.

If you don’t meet those criteria and still want the job, google is your friend.

#8

I’m in the same sort of position as you and then some. After basically retiring I did many years with a friends business until the point came that the friend and business combined were NOT worth the effort. So I hit the bricks and ran into the online assessments. I was lucky; snagged a good (for me) gig right off the bat and have been there basically the past year.

Our HR does scan every “reject” the online assessment throws away just to see if the machine is right. Some older people overthink them, some younger people underthink them, and some middle-aged comedians come up with sets of answers HR saves and passes around at lunch time. They are used by some companies but if you are not hearing back from someone that isn’t the part that is to blame; more likely age and past work experience as others have pointed out. Its just a great excuse for MegaCorp not to have someone spend the time to actually talk to you when they already decided against giving you a chance.

#9

Forgive me for posting a response that’s not an answer to your question, but I was just wondering if you had considered non profit organizations? If you can find the right matchup, I bet there are quite a few of them who would be thrilled to get a person of your experience part-time at a bargain rate. If this idea is interesting to you, maybe you could think about what issues matter to you, find some local non profits that address them, find out who the executive directors are, and write them a letter telling them about yourself and what you’re looking for. Maybe ask to meet for coffee. Worst case, you’ll likely meet some great people, who probably would not ask you to take any online assessment tests. :slight_smile: