For my first post I would just like to say how much I enjoy THE STRAIGHT DOPE. I’ve been looking at a lot of Cecils archive for a few months now, and just recently discovered the message boards. Allow me to tell you about myself:
I’m a married, 36 year old man with 3 kids. I love trivia, which is how I found the STRAIGHT DOPE. I happen to be somewhat conservative, but I cant stand people on either side of the political spectrum who have closed minds. I hate mindless platitudes, and in a few ways I can be very liberal. Other than that I’m just an average guy with an average job living in an average house with a great family!
I’d just like to say I’m glad to be here!
And the general question here would be…?
Hello Gene, and welcome to the board. Something like your post here would probably fare better in MPSIMS.
I think the guy just wants to be nice. It use to be fashionable. Still is where I come from.
Hi to the new guy.
If you are somewhat conservative, we could be in trouble once we start to go at it. But if you can prove it, or back it with facts, I will generally agree, or at least allow you your opinion. If you can’t or don’t, I still will allow you to have it, but will change it or trash it. Fair enough?
Hi, GENE STONER. Welcome to the Straight Dope. GENE STONER, your coming out probably would have been better in MPSIMS (pronounced “Em-Pizms”) but I’m sure that the mods will go easy on you, GENE STONER, just this once. Oh and another thing, GENE STONER- why is your handle in ALL CAPS? It looks a little SPOOFy, er… GOOFY. No offense 
Ya might want to email TubaDiva and ask her to turn down the volume on your screen name.
Welcome to the SDMB. As beatle said this belongs in the MPSIMS forum. I’ll move it for you.
DrMatrix — General Questions Moderator
That’s what he says, alternately we say mup-sims.
Hi gene and welcome. Don’t be put off by the brusque big city types here. Just make your way over to MPSIMS where you can have all sorts of fun.
We have a small-town feel there, except that the small town is populated by ferals with mohawks, eloquent housewives, professors of philosophy, men who have just gotten out of prison, lesbians who won’t be patronised and young virgin men who can repeat every word of the entire Star Wars nonology. See, you’re liking it already.
C’mon over.
Redboss
HEY GANG, FRESH MEAT ON ITS WAY!!
Despite your choice in using all-caps for your username, you seem like a nice fellow, so welcome, GENE STONER.
Or “mip-sims.” That’s what I do. I understand that there’s a splinter faction that says “emm-pee-sims,” but these people are clearly insane. 
Welcome to The Straight Dope, Gene Stoner. Nitpicking, contrarian posts like this is just a part of daily life here! 
That’s “nitpicking contrarian posts like this one are just a part of daily life here.” Clearly, someone broke into my room, knocked me on the head, and posted that before I came too.
::sniff:: So??? What’s wrong with that? A lot of people are insane!
::sulks off::
That’s “came to.” Although the first version is certainly interesting…
For some reason the only letters that appear when I glance at the forum titles for this one are “MSPS”, just like that, all dyslexicated and what have you. in my head it becomes “misspiss”.
So we’ll see ya, GENE STONER somewhere in misspiss.
P.S. Are you related to the Levi family?
(hey… at least it iznt that other… fukkin kid… lettem have his kaps… at least for a little wile…)
[sub]What kind of GENE is this?[/sub]
[sub]Weird, I tell you, WEIRD[/sub]
[sup]I’ll keep him busy[/sup]
Hi, Gene. Are you one of the Stones from Castlebury?
Welcome Gene.
And just for the record, I thought you caught WAY too much flak over that M-16 problem, when it was the Army’s fault…but that’s government for you.
Juniper200, hearty chuckle there…ahh, it’s all of our own lives.
That was a good one.
Sack! I wanted to be the first one to refer to the M-16!
I’m confused. Should I be pronouncing it “Mup One Six” or “Em two to the fourth”?
And welcome Gene
I’ll have you know that this statement is a lie. A filthy, ugly lie. The kind of lie that…
AAAAAAARGH!!! The purple hammers of doom are skinning the jelly ectoplasms from my small closet and I can feel them breathe with quiet hysteria not unlike what I…
Ummm… The kind of lie that can really hurt some people. I don’t think there’s any need for such mudslinging here. Can’t we…
AAAAAAAAARRGH!!! Not unlike what I had for breakfast on that fateful Tuesday when all the eggs fell from my harmonica tree, and we had to call pygmies to help with the peas and pees, despite their more pressing problems with the ulcerated alligators that so wantonly fretted in the gray figure skating manual that my uncle…
Ummmm… Can’t we just all get along, like that great family that we’re supposed to be? I mean, who cares how you pronounce “MPSIMS”? Isn’t it all a matter of perception? Don’t you…
AAAAARGH!!! that my uncle tore away from my cold, pleading hands when I was but a little spoon that hadn’t felt the harmony of devastation from the meteorologists who were of the mistaken opinion that Mr. Rogers had gone too damn far!
Ummmm… Don’t you think that there’s room for people who call it “emm-pee-sims,” and that it’s a little harsh to call us crazy?