Hello Kitty! To the bowels of hell I say!

The BBQ Pit
1

I have long resisted the whims of consumerism and advertising.

I haven’t caved in to the fashion dictates of what to where right now lest I be deemed unworthy.

I haven’t caved in to beer ads telling me to drink this and be popular because I don’t like beer.

When I drink wine, it comes from a box.

I have always walked to the tune of a different drummer musically speaking, which has pretty much always been against the herd pop culture mentality.

When everyone was drinking, I stayed sober and drove them home.

When everyone was smoking, I declined.

When I suspected drugs, I left.

I am as square as they come and proudly so.

Electronically speaking, I am about three years behind on trends, or longer, and I pick whatever was the IT thingamabob for a few lousy shekels instead of the Hot Off The Press Top Dollar Prices Now Now Now! stuff.

When all my friends were saving themselves for marriage. I wasn’t.

When all my friends were getting married and starting families. I was happily committed to a guy and we traveled the four winds.

When everyone else started off their married life with a shitty apartment or crappy house, we built our own home.

When everyone else leases a car and has perpetual payments, I pay cash for a used car, maintain it properly and drive it until it is not worth resusitating.

When all my friends went to college for an MRS degree, I was working the front lines of drudge jobs that I liked.

When my friends had a plan for life, I was ( and remain) out of focus.

When friends spaz out over crisis in their lives, I become razor sharp and rock solid.

When other people cook for twelve, I have spasms.

When everyone on the planet e-mails, I hand write letters.

I carry my own luggage, pack light, wear comfortable shoes and have always worn sunscreen before it became trendy.

I’ve always been off a step from the rest of the herd, and I am more than ok with that. I find humor at funerals, giggle at sensitive moments during weddings and reading of wills and can make anyone laugh.

But, for some inexplicable reason, when I walk into a Hello Kitty store, my brain just fogs over and I want to buy everything in the fucking store!

Why?

What the fuck do I, a 37 year old domestic tyrant with two kids want with the pastel-y pink plastic items? What could I possibly want with the cutesy retro avacado green design themes? Do I really need a vinyl chocolate brown wallet with a black cat on it?

I cannot resist that fucking baby seal humping store.

I go in there with the excuse to buy a few little extra presents for an upcoming four year olds birthday present and I have to physically restrain myself from purchasing a Hello Kitty pink and silver back pack and beach towel for myself.

How fucking pathetic is that?

Somehow, through forces I do not quite understand, I have not bought myself anything.

Yet.

But I don’t know how much longer I can resist.

I could freaking decorate my house in that cats motif. It’s just so damned cute I could hug it and make it my best friend. GAH!

Me, the person that thinks Disney is the Ultimate Hawker of Commercialism and Souless/Cultureless Vacations and who bought all her kids souvenier t-shirts for the Disney Trip at the Salvation Army, who did not cave in to buy one thing for herself or her kids inside of the MegaDisney complex/compound despite being surrounded by it all the time.

And I crave goat fucking Hello Kitty.
Bastards.

I am

2

Hello Weebl

That is probably the most bizarre Weebl and Bob I’ve ever seen. And that’s saying something.

3

Shirley, that is fantastic.

I remember taking my mother virtually to the poorhouse on Hello Kitty pens, erasers and crap like that when I was in junior high.

I think the only thing that keeps me from the path of madness you’re trodding down is that I haven’t been in a traditional mall in eons. Hence, I’ve avoided that demon store.

Don’t you tempt me!!!

4

Am I the only one wondering if the OP has purchased for herself a fully licensed Hello Kitty Vibrator?

One of kids at work has a girlfriend that is obsessed with HK. I’ve counseled him to purchase one of these for her to break her. :slight_smile:

5

You know, in Japan it’s not particularly unusual for a 37-year old woman to have Kitty-chan accessories.

Just think of yourself as ‘internationalized’.

6

Do you know why Hello Kitty has no mouth?

Because she speaks from the heart!

7

Badtz Maru kicks ass, too.

8

I have a Badtz Maru boombox, and Badtz Maru undies. :smiley: The Hello Kitty stuff lures me in, but if I don’t see any decent Badtz Maru merchandise, I’m out of there.

9

Just think of it as karma’s little way of saying, “Hey, all that holier-than-thou ‘free-spirit’ stuff you’ve got going on isn’t absolute.”

You’re in the muck with the rest of us conformists, and all the pretty pink towels in the world will not wipe you clean.

10

A Hello Kitty Vibrator! :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek:
That is just wrong. It would be like having a Virgin Mary Vibrator…

I feel so icky now.

11

I’ve never bought any Hello Kitty stuff myself, but I’d pay top dollar for that.

12

This morning I had a discussion with a supplier concerning the various aspects of male and female velcro strips. I thought my day couldn’t get weirder. Then I opened this thread.

Shirley Ujest has confessed to being a sucker for Hello Kitty. :eek:

Airman Doors links to Hello Weebl. :smiley: and :eek:

I am now afraid to go outside. The sky will be green and the grass will be blue. I just know it.

13

Oh, you poor kid. I know where you’re coming from. I have a ceramic Hello Kitty dish that I keep my son’s baby teeth in.

I have a brown pen that has a Hello Kitty in a monkey suit on top of it. It rocks.

I’ll do anything for Hello Kitty. Even…muuuuurder.

14

Hello Kitty is da debbil. I thought so decades ago the first time I saw it hit the states and I still think so.

Badtz maru, however, rocks my world. It started off innocently enough with a little notebook with a shiny silver cover and Badtz in his surly glory but it’s progressed to pens, pencils, stationery, desk set, stickers and sticker books, coin banks (one for each denomination of coin), seasonal figurines, calculator, bobbleheads, compact-with-comb, juggling balls (set of three, one badtz, one Hana maru and one Pandaba) Christmas tree ornaments (and I don’t even have a tree), key chains, coin purses, key chain/coin purse combinations, floor mats for my car (which aren’t actually in my car; they work so much better as area rugs for my apartment), gum dispensers which I fill with Tic-Tacs, sunglass case, backpacks in two sizes, beach set, bath set, toothbrush with paste, soap, CD holder, nail polish, sparkly lip gloss and a two-foot tall Badtz in gold lah-may. None of which ever get used because then, you see, I wouldn’t have them any more. I laminated Badtz maru-shaped note papers in two styles to make wall art. I bought two sets of erasers so I could make earrings. I bought three identical rings, again so I could make earrings for a matching set.

So far I’ve been able to resist things like the boombox and I don’t have any clothing items (but only because when I was seriously stocking up I was too fat to fit into any of it). So far. But I live only a couple hours away from a Sanrio store and I sometimes hear its siren song…

15

I’ve got the boombox too! I luuurve Badtz Maru. There’s definitely not enuf Badtz Maru stuff out there…

But they’re sooooo cute. Athough, according to the article, Sanrio was displeased byt he product and has even destroyed the molds to make them. They do seem to be much harder to find than they once were…

16

Have you seen the punker and pirate Hello Kittys at Hot Topic? I’m usually immune to HK’s charms, but those were very tempting for me.

My downfall whenever I get near a Sanrio store is Chococat. He’s just so fraggin’ cute…

17

Upside_Down_Amber, AKA kung fu wifey, has often complained about my Hello Kitty obsession, and will probably continue to do so, loud and long, until the universe collapses into a singularity.

My HK purchasing peccadilloes: It has to be useful. I prefer red, purple and rainbow items over pink and blue. Anything ingenious is a definite plus. I yearn for toasters, tvs and telephones, but it is hopeless, since anything HK I buy will be for my own personal use. Kung fu wifey just wouldn’t stand for having to eat toast with HK’s face on it. She would probably yell, throw it across the room and then cry. And then yell some more.

18

I cannot stand Hello Kitty. Something about it just creeps me out.

I am thankful I don’t have a daughter because then I too might get sucked into this madness.

I’ll be thinking of you, Shirley. :wink:

19

My son and I used to have a tiny safety pin with a very small Hello Kitty on it. We loved it so much. We would take turns having custody of it. We’d wear it on hats, lapels, whatever. Sometimes we would just carry it around with us. It. Was. So. Cute. And. Small. Sigh…I love the little thing.

20

Doors! what the hell is that site? It is so freaking odd. It’s like and I apologize in advance for even having this thought Stephan Hawkins and some Cerebal Palsied victim having a conversation.

What level of hell do you reside, airman? More importantly, why do you know about this stuff? :dubious: