In fact, lemme tell ya about bein’ a rock superstar and about bein’ a rap superstar.
What was your first clue?
C-. You may wish to try sampling the rants of more talented writers in your material.
Stick with this ‘mystery’ awhile, it will eventually expand your mind. Why do artists who seem to suck succeed so often?
You can’t detect the ‘art’ of their work. Whoosh!
Just to point out how outdated this rant is, the track you’re referencing here was released 20 years ago.
I’ve thought about it a long time, and I think the problem is that bitches be trippin.
…and every year since. The reason this rant works today even though it’s from 1998 is because nothing has changed.
I’m pretty sure rappers no longer live large.
Then you’re not listening to rap. Which is fine, but seriously.
Like this? NSFW lyrics, so spoilered.
Not necessarily rap-related; I can predict the content of the next hit single from several currently-popular artists with near 100% accuracy.
Usher - “I’m Usher!”
Taylor Swift - “Why do all men suck?”
Bruno Mars - “Why do women hate me?” (should do a duet with Taylor Swift)
Pink - “I’m breaking up with you!”
Pitbull - “I’m from Miami. And I’m rich. And I’ve got lots of women after me. And I’m from Miami. Did I mention I’m from Miami? And rich.”
I refuse to admit that I am elderly until someone starts a Golden Oldie radio station for rap.
Regards,
Sho “Imma pop a cap in your Depends” dan
Kind of looks like a younger version of Clark from the Office.
ETA: Although it apparently appears to be an adult comedian named Andy Milonakis.
Win.
When my brother was in high school (early 1980s), he had a “band”, and they would just bang on their instruments and make noise while my brother screamed obscenities at the top of his lungs. 
After Nirvana hit the big time, I was telling some people at work about it, and one person said that if this “band” existed now, they could go to Seattle and get rich quick.
My brother still has the tapes they made of this.
Before that, MAD magazine had a piece where they went to a recording studio, and one performer orders a sandwich with all kinds of bizarre ingredients on it. Another person said, “You’re not going to eat that, are you?” and he replies, “No way! I’m gonna PLAY it!”. Someone else said, “I feel sick.” Yet another person says, “Hook up a mike - we have a hit single here!” and someone else says, “Throw a band behind him, and we’ll have a top ten album!”
:smack:
Here’s the thing.
There are literally hundreds of thousands of kids who are trying to make it big in the music business. Or “music” business, if you can’t stand the noise the kids are listening to nowadays.
If it was super-easy to be a superstar, then there would be hundreds of thousands of superstars. There ain’t.
So what does that mean? It means it ain’t easy to become a music superstar. It certainly is true that the dancers and vocalists who get up on stage aren’t necessarily the most important part of the product. In hip hop this is even more true than other styles of music. This is why “producers” are the real superstars in hip hop, just like Motown used to crank out songs by interchangeable girl groups.
The person standing on stage and moving their mouth, or providing the vocal track on a recording, is often a hired hand. Sometimes literally, sometimes essentially. Often groups have people who are essentially dancers who are an important part of the stage show, but don’t actually contribute much if anything to the recorded music.
So how is it that some people get rich in the music industry, and some people end up delivering pizza? If it were as easy as saying “Nigga Nigga Bitch Bitch Money Money” then any pizza guy could do it. But if any pizza guy could do it, then the actual guy saying the words is an interchangeable frontman who can be bought and sold and sent back to the pizza joint when his services are no longer required.
The funny thing is, just about every so-called musician you’ve ever heard of, no matter how much they suck and how horrible their music is, is probably more musically talented than 99 out of 100 people. That’s because you have to actually try to make music before you can make it in the music business. Yeah, there are plenty of top 40 groups that aren’t much better than the bar band that plays every weekend at your local watering hole. But that bar band at your neighborhood tavern is actually really talented musically–compared to most people.
Do yourself a favor and don’t go to Sirius 46.
T.I. - “I’m awesome.” Seriously that’s all he ever fucking says. Ever.
Correction: “Ursher baby!”
That is an extremely scary thought, given the lack of talent on the radio.