Help me finish my hardcore thrash metal church song!

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

For my church talent show, I need something that will make poeple look at me funny for ~3 months. I’ve come up with a H@rDc0r3 song.


COTTON SHIRT! NIPPLES HURT!
(repeat 8x)

HOOKED ON PHONICS WORKED FOR ME!
(repeat 24 times, becoming less like yelling
and more like cats screwing each time)

And i need a third verse. Help, dopers?

;D

Clean your plate. Brush your teeth. Feel my muscles.

2

Whoa, dude… you can say “nipples” at your church talent show? Cool!

Here, try this. I’m combining them with your first two original verses so it flows better:

“Cotton shirt! Nipples hurt!
Hooked on Phonics worked for me!
Down the street the meat is free!”

3

From a kinda recent pit thread:

“I thought this place was really great, but instead is filled with hate.”

(I was really hoping that it would be a Dr Suess style rant.)

4

and you know what? the KJV of the bible says ‘piss’ seven times! heehee.

5

M…S…N.B.C
M…S…N.B.C…

[chant, repeat 8x]
Number One News Site, piss piss piss
Harry Potter, Harry Potter, kiss kiss kiss

[growling, repeat 8x]

Choose your NEWS! Choose your NEWS!

[falsetto shriek, repeat ad lib until the deacons pull your plug]

6

Alligator Pie

(repeat once)

7

Roger:

I was saving these for my own song, but I’ll never get around to it, so welcome to these lyrics.

My kid and my money
My kid and my money
My kid and my money go to some big school

Proud parent of a
Proud parent of a
Proud parent of an honor school student

Honk if you love Jesus

8

Heresthechurchheresthesteeple
Heresthechurchheresthesteeple
Heresthechurchheresthesteeple
Heresthechurchheresthesteeple

OPENTHEDOORSSEEALLTHEPEOPLE

9

In church I recommend sticking with Bible verses. Can’t go wrong there. Ezekiel 23:20 comes to mind:

[sub]and on this date, November 19, 2001, more SDMB members read their Bible than on any other date in history.[/sub]

10

MY BOWELS WERE MOVED FOR YOU!
(repeat 16x fast)