Help me, I'm a lurker!

There be a lot of Florida Dopers here!
Yeah, I get the same feeling. :wink:
But I think it’s more that people on SDMB would breathe a collective sigh of relief.
I haven’t been here that long, though. People here are great!

Cute, ETF!
Know any dirty ones?

There once was a Doper named Eddy,
Who went also by Teddy & Freddy.
The thread she did save
From Harmless’ dug grave,
Unfortunately, she forgot to duck the machete.
:smiley:

That harmless is certainly not;
But ETF? Perish the thought!
She sometimes is flirty
But never is dirty –
Her image must be without blot!

ETF’s image without blot?
Harmless says, “Certainly not!”
ETF claims she’s a lady,
But the name’s a bit shady.
So when you pee, do you stand or squat?

Oh, sitting is par for my course
On a throne, or a chair, or a horse.
I’ve only one head
Unlike EdTeddyFred,
Who triunely their rule do enforce.

Those limericks made me lose it :slight_smile:

I am The Great Zamboni
I stick to this board like honey
I lurk on the Dope
So I sit around and mope
Now they have some of my money

I don’t nitpick. I like to bug people about big important things, which I have never done here. I may have to submerge myself in GD. I avoid it because it really peves me, and it’s too long.

No, I am the Thread Killer! Do you know how many threads I have killed?! If anyone is going to kill this thread, it will be the one who started it. I can make another one just like it.

I never will. Never change your name, Spectre.

You “lurkers” with your high post counts… wannabes.

Hmmmm, the irony. As long as I don’t do this posting thing TOO much, I guess.

490? :stuck_out_tongue:

Cheezits! I hope you don’t have kids! :smiley:

Are you kidding? You’re not a lurker. Me, I’m a lurker. Look at my stats you’ll see what a real lurker looks like. I read the SDMB every single day (yes I have no life) but I’ve got absolutely nothing to say.

I’d like to de-lurk. I’m working on that now that I’ve paid. I’ve actually posted 3 times already today. Wooohooo!

The Great Zamboni thinks he’s a lurker
But me thinks he’s more of a shirker
He’s starting no threads
Or killing them dead
More like a bad gov’mt worker.

"Then she adopts another cat. And posts about it. And the hamsters cry out yet again…"ETF is my new idol on the SDMB!!! :smiley:

Thanks for the laugh ETF and harmless!!

And Eyer8, “What’s wrong with being a lurker? I like to lurk. Sure, liking lurking limits loquaciousness, but it also lets lurkers learn lots.” That’s a sig line if I ever saw one!

:smiley: Yogini

Lots of Floridians!
Woo Hoo!

There once was a doper named Zamboni,
Who claimed to be a lurker; baloney!
Three pages of posts,
His profile does boast,
I’d say his acting deserves a Tony.
:stuck_out_tongue:

ETF, lovely pics! Personal? Closest I’ve been to China is EPCOT. :wink:

Lurkers and Posters are part of the same biological entity. They need each other. How could you have 1000 views on a 50 post thread otherwise?

Just like a singer at a concert: “I couldn’t do this without you!”. One needs an audience to speak to.

Just trying to increase my post count so people will take me seriously.

The throne and sedan chair were Googled. The cats are mine own, sirrahs and fair ladies, and that is indeed your humble servant astride Nicky, the Magnificent Pickle.

Okay, here’s egg on my face. I’m not a lurker after all. The real lurkers have admonished me for calling myself one of them. Now I will have to be a codescending elitist.

No, harmless, I don’t have kids. I’m not even twenty, though that’s not a barrier. My 495 posts are my children. I’m actually a deadbeat Dad because I pop them out, see them once, then send them on their way without direction. They are just floating around, never getting anywhere because they never got proper guidance.

Is this thread really an evil plot to get myself attention?

Can I be a lurker??? :confused:

Hey, with .0164383 posts per day, you’re doing a good job so far. Just don’t get carried away and blast it up to .02, or you’ll blow it.

Well, now that I have spent US$4.95 (roughly AUD$8 - think of the 2 coffees I could have bought) I will more than likely blow my lurking status. :slight_smile: As long as I can think of mundane things to share…

Zamboni lurking isn’t al that bad you know. You sit there all days taking in all that is posted only to amaze and baffle you’re friends and neighbours later in the day with all your SD facts !
Look at me…

**
Ponster
Join Date: 11-16-1999
Total Posts: 164 [.B]
I’m proud of that. You too should be proud of your stats and inability to add anything of use to the board !

More than anything I’m proud of being mostly invisible and having absolutely nothing useful to add to a discussion. Kind of like this post.

The Great Zamboni he lurks no more
The lurkers have shown him the door
But is he elitist
Or just defeatist
Let’s hope he’s not another bore.