I’m hoping someone can help me. A little background is needed. And this is a little embarrassing, so pleeease be nice!
As some of you may know, I have been in contact with a man I met on another message board. We’ve met and he’s coming to visit me again in a couple of weeks (we live in different states).
Well, this visit is going to be more . . . ahem . . . romantic than the first one. The advice I need is this: what is a good CD to make love to? I have lots of CD’s, but I really don’t have one that is perfect for this kind of time together, you know? The best one I have for this kind of mood is Live’s “The Distance to Here,” but even that doesn’t really work. Do any of you have any favorites that you can recommend?
My taste: Alternative, New Age. I don’t like twangy country, soul, R&B, adult contemporary (Whitney Houston, Maria Carey), or hip hop.
Any suggestions would be most welcome. I want this to be perfect!
If you work too hard on getting the music just right, or even worse, if you succeed at finding that which you think to be absolutely perfect, then I think your plans could backfire if it turns out that he doesn’t love it as much as you do.
My suggestion: Aim for something more generic. Of course something that you do like a lot. But if you’ve resorted to asking our advice, then you’re already put too much of an emotional investment into this. Stop looking for the perfect cd, and instead work on perfecting other aspects of your life and your self.
My current favorite CD for this is Herbie Hancock’s “Secrets.” You may not like it, being a 70s jazz thing, but it’s absolutely great for making love. I mean, it has a song titled “Doin’ It” for crying out loud.
On the alternative end, I always found Smashing Pumkins “Gish” and especially Jane’s Addiction “Ritual de lo Habitual” (mmm…“3 days”) to be right for the occasion.
Sarah McLaughlin’s Fumbling Towards Ecstacy is a wonderful album for the occassion. VERY sexy. You also cannot go wrong with Al Green or Barry White. It sounds cheesy, but its really not. I’d definitely give Sarah a listen through to see if it works for you. Its fairly different than her other stuff.
Magnolia Soundtrack/Aimee Mann.
It’s a winner around the old Batty Manor.
Or Natalie Merchant.
Come to think of it most of the good “sexin’ up” music is my wife’s favorites rather than mine, so I think you are on the right track. Don’t ever let the guy pick the music to screw to. Of course this only applies to heterosexual couples. Gay and lesbian couples will just have to fight it out.
I don’t have alot of experience in this, but I would bet that anything by Fear Factory is probably totally wrong. Find out what he likes (stylewise) and if it’s totally non-romantic music, just pick something (try to find out what he -doesn’t- like first) that you think will go well. Then- try to make a good associative connection between the music and the mood. (wink, wink)…
Dire Straits is good music, very mellow, good baseline (not too much though, very soft), a nice beat, and I think, very conducive to a romantic mood (at least the slow stuff).
Check out the album first, and set the cd player to skip the tunes you think need skipping- or… get napster, and set up a playlist.
The key here, TracyMarie, is to find something that YOU like. Its going to be in your place, in your room. As a guy, just being in my girlfriend’s bedroom starts getting me in the mood. But its familiar territory for you. YOU need it to be different, YOU need to mood to be set. So play what YOU like, and don’t worry too much over what he’s going to like. He’s going to like anything. And I certainly don’t mean that in a bad way, or am I trying to imply anything else. I guess what I saying is that he’s going to take the cue from you as to what the mood is. You can do whatever you want, and I’m sure he’ll appreciate it. I know I would.