that is what it sounds like when a guy (co-worker) walks past my desk, looks at the granola bar I am eating, and says, “Thats got a lot of calories”.
So if any man reading this did not know already:
NEVER MAKE COMMENTS ABOUT WHAT A FEMALE IS EATING.
Just be on the safe side, and make NO COMMENT.
I am really insecure and already have .2 oz of self esteem on a good day. I know it is sad to let others (I am sure, completely innocent) comments get to me, but they do. I have body image issues, even though I know I am not over weight.
I blame my parents. My mom actually said to me, as I am sobbing uncontollably about my almost-fiance dumping me, " well, I hope you dont get fat this time." because a few years ago he and I broke up for several months and I gained 10-15 lbs.
(n her defense, she is really simple minded and does not realize what she is saying is so inappropriate. She is very small town and manners and social skills are lacking)
Anyway, just know that comments regarding a girl’s food are usually best left unsaid.
Did you confront him about it? If you don’t say anything, either to him or to your manager, then you are willing to allow him to make these kinds of comments during every lunch hour.
Come on. He said it had a lot of calories. He didn’t say she was fat. I think it’s stupid to comment on other people’s food but let’s not start reporting each other.
I remember watching an ad for Nutri-grain bars a while back, in which a young, pregnant couple is looking at a house for sale. The man remarks that it’s a good thing they were able to see the house on such short notice, but he had to leave work early and hadn’t had anything to eat yet. His wife offers him a Nutri-grain bar, and he says, “Honey, I think it’s great that you’re trying to eat healthy, but for me…” and turns her down, and I thought to myself, “This is a man who takes some things in life way too much for granted, say, being able to see out of both eyes…”
Speaking as a diabetic who has to choose his snacks carefully, no, actually, Granola bars don’t have a lot of calories. Big Macs have a lot of calories, as the people at Subway will gleefully point out.
Damn. Sorry about that, Mint Julep. I don’t care who you are, male or female, it is never acceptable to make that kind of a comment, especially while you are right in the middle of enjoying your food.
A co-worker of mine recently introduced me to the phrase, “He/She yucked my yum,” to describe when someone makes particularly negative comments about something you’re eating. “Eww, that looks awful! How can you stand to eat that?” That sort of thing. Definitely not cool.
Well, you have two choices- say nothing, and be prepared to deal with these kinds of potential comments in the future, or politely ask him not to comment on your food.
You say in the OP that you are extremely self-concious, yet you don’t want to hurt the other guy’s feelings by calling him on something he said that upset you. Whos feelings are more important here?
Why is what this co-worker said necessarily a negative comment? Fercrissakes, I wish people would gather up their emotional baggage and get a fuckin’ grip on reality. It was a comment in passing. Not an insulting remark to the eater OR to the food. It was a comment. Not a racist statement. Not hate speech. Won’t someone think of the fucking granola bar???
I hope you can get better at that “self esteem” thing Mint Julep. Try telling the guy “please don’t talk about my food, I’m feeling very self concious these days” if he is the nice guy you suggest he will understand.
You know, that sounds like the kind of comment people sometimes make when they are trying to lose weight. You can get kind of obsessive if you’ve been counting calories or carbs or points religiously for a while.
Sweetie, I think this is your problem. Let’s work on getting your self-esteem boosted up, then you’ll be confident enough to think of a snappy comeback.
I agree that the OP is totally overreacting. There’s nothing rude about giving somebody some nutritional information about what they’re eating, especially when it comes to items that are falsely marketed as 'healthy" when they really aren’t. It sounds to me like just a friendly heads up.
I don’t understand why it’s considered so rude to comment on somebody’s weight anyway. I don’t mean name-calling or mocking, but expressing concern or interest or offering advice. Why are we all supposed to pretend that we don’t notice that fat people are fat? I don’t think that giving fat people dietary advice is any more rude than encouraging smokers to quit or (to make an analogy to the granola bar) telling them that “light” cigarettes are really no better than the regular ones.
The same thought occurred to me. After the birth of our second child thissummer, my wife was trying to lose her baby weight and became preoccupied with counting the calories in everything. She would always tell me what was wrong with everything I was eating, not as a comment on my own weight but just because she was stuck in that mode of analyzing everything.
Well, I’m not for giving unsolicited advice, but if someone asks me to scold them away from the chocolate, I’ll do that. I won’t tsk tsk them otherwise, that’s just rude.
I dont think it is my place to tell fat people what I think they should or should not eat, nor do I tell others to stop smoking…It is none of my business.
And it was none of this guys business what I eat either.
He is not my friend. He is my CO-WORKER.
I did not ask him to give me the calorie count, and I did not tell him that he was clogging an artery with his daily Big Mac either, because it is none of my business.
I do need to buck up and not let comments like that bother me, and I did not intend for this post to turn so serious.
I also feel that commenting on someone else’s food, weight, etc. is rude and uncalled-for. If someone wants another’s opinion on what they are eating or their weight, I’m sure they will ask. Until you are asked, just keep quiet. Same for cigarettes, unless the person and cigarette in question are polluting your air. One’s weight and/or choice of food, etc. is no one else’s business.
