More details unfolded today - he backed into me on his way to lunch, then…came back and parked elsewhere in the lot and went into the court to wait his turn in front of the judge.
Yes.
My officer interrupted the court, called his name, and informed the judge that surveillance had him in a hit and run in the parking lot. Cuffed and escorted across the hall to the Sheriff’s office in front of everyone else in the courtroom.
My insurance agent practically burst out laughing when I informed him I had a police incident report, video surveillance, and digital photos of the other car’s matching-dent fender with my car’s paint on it. Claims probably don’t get much easier than that.
And he was there to dispute a speeding ticket. Probably should’ve just paid that one, eh?
It was prior to one of the 2004 hurricanes, and traffic on the northbound turnpike was not moving. At all.
Some blonde twit went flying down the breakdown lane in a black SUV. I **HATE **people who do that.
So I’m cursing under my breath, when who should come flying down the breakdown lane after her but one of Florida Highway Patrol’s Finest, sirens blaring and lights a-flashing.
She was still pulled over when I finally inched my way past her. I hope she saw me laughing at her.
I wish I’d had your friend’s cops. Four days after buying a new motorcycle, I had to lock up the brakes to avoid hitting a stupid bitch who barreled through a red light at an intersection and did an illegal U-turn right in front of me—I dropped the bike. She did stop, however, and when the cop arrived, she and her passenger lied about the direction they were coming from, said they hadn’t made a U-turn, and that my bike simply “fell over” for no reason. Despite the fact that I had several witnesses, the cop said there was nothing he could do as there was no collision.
So, lying bitch drove off on her happy way and I was left to spit nails. That was over a year ago and I’m still pissed.
How about the guy who admitted to his probation officer that he’d celebrated finishing his alcohol counseling the night before by getting wasted? She smelled alcohol on his breath, which is why she asked. She gave him a test. .14.
Ok, heard this one from the judge it happened to. Guy was on trial for CCW (carrying concealed weapon) and his claim (on the stand) was that it was impossible for him to have been carrying a gun in his pocket 'cause the pocket was too small, holding out the jacket on the stand. Judge asked to see it, reached into the pocket to find the 5 rocks of crack therein.
I got a story that’s exactly four times better than that. Last year, round about this time, I’m stuck in traffic, and I see a guy pull out of the line and go down the emergency breakdown lane. Three other cars decide that’s a good idea, and follow his lead. About ten minutes later, traffic has moed enough that I can see that right around a bend in the road, there’s a highway patrol car, parked in the emergency lane, with a cop working his way down the line of four cars, writing tickets for everyone.
A number of years ago a motorist ran into the front of my business. Through the glass entry doors. That customers go in and out of frequently during business hours. It was a miracle that no one was hurt.
Turns out the driver had no license or insurance due to the fact that he had a revoked driver’s license. The cop that responded to the call wrote the driver a ticket for no insurance, driving while revoked and failure to control his motor vehicle (or some such.) He then let the driver (with no license, insurance, ect.) drive away!!! Color me gob-smacked…
This was in Josephine County, about 350 miles south of Beaverton.
OP, I’m glad you got your justice.
Yuppers. Couple of months ago, some dim bulb smashed the crap out of my buddy’s car parked on the curb in front of his house. Dimbulb drove away. Leaving burnout marks coming all the way down the block from his girlfriend’s house, skid marks around the corner to the accident scene, his mangled front bumper, and more burnout marks all the way up to Main street. My buddy’s car ended up on the sidewalk.
My bud calls the sherrif. Sherrif runs the plates and calls up Dimbulb. Dimbulb denies it all… until confronted with his own license plate. Oh that. Apparently Dimbulb had an arrgyment wiv the girlfriend, wuz all aggwavated & stuff. Then he wants my buddy to not press charges, not report it to his insurance, and let him make monthly payments until it’s all squared up. Scout’s honor.
Sherrif says he can do that, but if no accident report is filed then it didn’t officially happen. So Dimbulb could stop paying any old time and my bud couldn’t do anything about it. My buddy declines this unique and interesting offer. Dimbulb sprays spit cursing him out, calls him a huge asshole.
Sherrif writes up Dimbulb for the collision, another one for hit & run, and another one for assualt comma verbal. Dimbulb proceeds to get in Sherrif’s grill. Dimbulb receives one each standard manhandling, free ride downtown, and night in jail. Sherrif never did get around to mentioning 400 ft of skid marks in a residential neighborhood.
Double bonus: Insurance paid off at blue book without even stopping by for a look. The car was a thrasher that was due to get junked anyway.
Not an accident, but extreme schadenfreud nonetheless.
Me & some friends went to see the show at Laguna Seca. After the races there was the usual huge lineup of cars trickling out to the highway. Staff was doing a good job of traffic control, there was just a lot of it. No problem.
Until a jeepload of grinning yokels comes cruising up the grass median in 4wd past the lineup. Leaving a quarter mile of nice tire tracks in the newly planted grass. We figured just one more jerk in the world, resume partying.
Hah. When we got to the top, there was the jeep parked just before the exit gate, with two cops leaning on it and all the yokels looking most aggreived. Watching the other 10,000 of us crawl by and laugh. We happened to be toward the end of the line and I’m guessing they made them stay until the very last car.
This past year, I filed a case on a guy who got arrested for Driving While License Invalid (DWLI) while on his way to court to plead guilty to a previous DWLI. We were going to revoke his bond for failure to appear, but found out he was in jail.
I also filed two Failure To Identify (gave a fake name and date of birth) cases on the same person that were incurred on two consecutive days. In other words, he gave police a fake name, was arrested, bonded out, and gave the police a fake name again the very next day. I have no idea how he thought he was going to get away with that. Dude, they just saw you yesterday!
But like we say around here: if they were smart, we’d be out of a job.
