Just a cheerful vitriol-filled rant against the humble peace officers who make a dramatic effort to enhance public safety on a holiday weekend, and the disease-ridden, festering, pus-dripping media hacks who encourage same.
Was it really necessary to station speed traps every 2 miles on the outer beltway encircling town, pulling over every hapless bozo going 5 miles over the limit (and no, I wasn’t one of said bozos)? Why was seemingly the entire police force of Desperately Cutesy Little Village compelled to set up their version of Checkpoint Charlie at the biggest intersection in town, complete with flashing lights, pointedly aimed radar guns and strutting bike patrol cops, fish-pale in their sausage-stuffed uniform shorts?
I know why. It’s the same moronic shit every year. There’s little domestic news on a holiday weekend (something I am lately thankful for), so the media feel compelled to wring every bit of juice out of what passes for news, including the dreaded Highway Death Toll/Carnage on Our Nation’s Roads. Yes, you brain-dead jackals of the press, there are more people traveling on holiday weekends, thus more highway deaths. But with all this fuss, cops feel pressure to Do Something, and even worse, an opportunity to strut their stuff and get attention for small-time crap that wouldn’t get a casual look at other times.
Now it’s not only state troopers that go nuts, but every pissant local force that wants attention for being a huge, useless pain in the ass. Take Desperately Cutesy Little Village for instance. Their only previous claim to fame is harboring a nude flasher who fondles and photographs his victims - but their big law enforcement push focuses on the dog-ass 25 mph limit through town, the better to protect the daily average of 3 pedestrians and parkers patronizing their hamburger stands and pizza parlors, if there are any left open after the latest Health Department inspections.
For awhile I’ve avoided road travel on holidays to escape both congestion and hyper-enforcement. Now I can’t even drive around town without running into this bullshit.
Here’s a hint, ossifers: Give the public a break and do a normal level of traffic enforcement during the holiday periods. If you want credit for special effort, we’d feel a helluva lot safer if you were stationed down at the water and nuke plants, or walking patrol at the malls.