How are you supposed to wear tube socks?

I find tube socks awkward to wear. How do I know where my heel is supposed to go? Since they’re not form-fitting, there’s always some excess material around the little toe. And they go too high up my leg. I feel like I should be in the NBA.

How do I deal with this excess material? Do I pull the tops up as high as they will go, so I look like the old retired guy who lives next door and doesn’t give a damn anymore? Do I roll them down neatly? Do I scrunch them down? Do I just drape the socks across my bare feet? Should I tie them around my ankles, like those assholes who used to wear sweaters tied around their necks? Or, do I do something else?

What does everyone else do?

I don’t think you’re really supposed to wear tube socks. I think they exist solely for the making of sock puppets.

They’re useful for putting C rations in to put in your rucksack. If you leave them in the box, the cans click around and make noise.

Who’s forcing you to wear tube socks? Get a different style of socks, like the ones that are prebent and of a shorter length. Life’s to short to wear clothing you don’t like.

I have some foot socks that are marked “left” and “right”. WTF is up with that?

I liked the idea of tube socks. I bought a pack of Hanes. They have stitching on the toe. It would be necessary to decide, and remember each time you wear them, “stitching on the toes or under the toes” :smiley: to ensure the heel is always the same. Or you can just go crazy and let them wear evenly at the heel. Unfortunately the pack of pairs I purchased would be tight on a 6" circumference pipe. So I filled a few with oranges and that worked great!

Now that it its getting down below freezing, people whose ears hang low wear them as fancy earmuffs. 'cause you can tie 'em in a knot, you can tie 'em in a bow. Very popular in da UP along with fudsters.

Bars of soap also work well.

I don’t understand why you don’t just make your own socks. Fresh woven is the only acceptable choice for the IQ level of any true Doper.

The “theory” behind tube socks is that they won’t always be worn the same way, but instead a different part of the sock will be on the bottom each time, kind of like rotating your tires for equal wear and longer life.

In other words, it’s supposed to ensure the heel is not always the same.

And they don’t leave bruises!
Perhaps this OP needs to hang out with the OP asking about how to wear baggy sweatpants! :slight_smile:

I haven’t worn tube socks since I was a kid, but I do not remember any excess material. The socks came up to about the low-to-mid-calf and pretty much everyone wore them the same way. As Doug K. notes, the orientation did not matter. The only thing that mattered was making sure the stripes matched.

Is it okay to wear tube socks to work?

Only if you take the subway to get there.

Especially if they are scented:

Victim: I was beaten

Cop: Can you identify the perp?

Victim: No but he sure did smell purdy :stuck_out_tongue:

“Foot socks”? As opposed to what other kind of sock? hand socks? windsocks?

Don’t know what they are really called. Socks that do not extend up the ankle. They only cover your foot? My son introduced me to them a few years ago.

Tube socks are properly worn on your dick.

Manscaping optional.

Last pair of tube socks I wore was in 1981.

We called them “footies” back in the day (1970s-80s), but now I think they call them ankle socks.