Yeah, that’s a firin’.
Not common at all in my experience. I would astonished if someone did any of these things to me. No one tries, though – I think I’ve got a trifecta going:
- I’m a woman, and I’m guessing this is somewhat less common among women
- I work in a field where this would be completely unacceptable (education) - as an industry, we’re maybe ahead of the curve about keeping really clear boundaries about inappropriate touching (to the point of goofiness, sometimes)
- I must be off-putting, because really, I can’t imagine anyone I know thinking a playful slap, shove, or whatever is going to go over well.
It’s quite common for Thai friends to slap each other in varying degrees of intensity, usually between two people of the same gender but sometimes a girlfriend or wife will do it to her man. They’re just being playful, but I find it annoying in the extreme. At least they confine it to themselves and don’t include foreigners.
I’ll sometimes lay my palm on a friend’s shoulder or back, very gently, and then apply a small amount of pressure as a kind of simulated shove. Sometimes I’ll do the same thing with a closed fist (often with a dramatic slow motion punching sound effect). I’m much larger than most of my friends and have learned to be gentle, even in play.
I also have to be careful with high fives.
Slap each other how, on the face?
There seems to be an idea among some that it is the intentions/emotions behind the behavior that counts rather than the behavior. So if their way of being friendly is to put someone in a headlock, they do not evaluate having put someone in a headlock but rather having been friendly.
From what I’ve seen, it’s mostly shoulder slaps or, among very good friends, the top of the head. I just don’t care fot that sort of thing myself.
I just have a hard time thinking of the joking reactions as slaps, punches, shoves, etc. They’re all fake versions of those.
Though I have known a few guys who like to punch each other repeatedly until one tells the other it hurts too much and must stop. That’s a real punch. And, yes, they’re under 30.