Does anyone know if there are legal implications in trying to force a roommate out?
The situation is: He was here before I was, and I moved in two years ago. I signed a lease almost a year ago. He is, however, more financially suited to move than I. It would be easier on him in general. I’m in Massachusetts. I tried to do a web search for legal issues and couldn’t find anything. Does anyone have any advice?
There’s not enough information here to answer. Is he on the lease, too? Is he doing something wrong/illegal/in violation of the lease?
Well, assuming that he’s not doing anything illegal or against the lease, and assuming that he was there first there’s probably no legal way for you to force him to move, financial ability not withstanding.
I suppose you could try to force him about by being a shitty roommate but he could retaliate.
I’m not sure you have too many options here.
Start having conversations with the walls, burn every item of food you cook, begin clipping your toe nails at the dinner table, and finally once a night recite entire scenes from The Road Warrior.
I wouldn’t give him more than a month. Good luck.
Okay, let’s assume I’m already a lousy roommate. Actually…that might not be quite fair. I do all the laundry, grocery shopping, pay the cleaning lady, etc. But things not being smooth between us, you can assume HE thinks I’m a lousy roommate.
He is on the lease. And I don’t think I have a leg to stand on, since he’s not doing anything illegal that I know of. He pays his share of the rent, etc. He’s VERBALLY abusive (extremely) but not physically and I don’t think anyone would call that illegal. They would just call me stupid for putting up with it.
I’ve been looking for places. Maybe I can convince him that HE wants to leave though…I just wish I could get someone BEHIND me in that.
If the verbal abuse includes threats of physical violence, it is highly illegal, and you should call the cops.
Do tell us more.
What is the problem? Why do you want him out?
Does he feel the same about you?
How many people sharing? Just the two of you? If more, how do the others feel about you? how do they feel about him?
And why should he move out anyway? He may be richer than you, but is he in any way at fault?
Give us some specifics, we might be able to help you.
Does he smoke pot? If the police catch him smoking or possessing marijuana in his room, then I’m sure your apartment complex would see this as a violation of the lease (that’s how my room mates got rid of one of my other room mates)
Unless he’s actually laying hands on you or verbally threatening you in the presence of others, it’s pretty much “He said - She said”, even if he is being a horse’s ass. You don’t really have a leg to stand on if he’s just a snarky asshole.
Just find a new place to move. Live is too short and sexy women who can write should be able to find lodgings somewhere.
Moved to IMHO.
-xash
General Questions Moderator
Well, I went through it in CA:
If he’s on the lease, you’re stuck, period. He lives there just as much as anyone, and you can’t just throw someone of his home. You can have him arrested for something illegal, but he’ll still live there, maybe now without having money to pay rent.
If he weren’t on the lease, the lease holder could just give him a 30 day notice (he doesn’t need to sign it, for once the law is on your side: just post it). But you said that’s not the case.
This is all based on my conversations with CA housing authority people.
First, as a tenant in Massachusetts you should never be without the book Legal Tactics: Tenants’ Rights in Massachusetts 
You can buy it from these people: http://www.neighborhoodlaw.org/cat/43
(direct link to the pdf order form: http://www.neighborhoodlaw.org/docs/2711_MLRI.MCLE.insert11.03_1.pdf )
or from a few other organizations in the state. If you’re in Boston you can walk in to their office on Winter Place (at Downtown Crossing) and buy it there.
It outlines your rights and responsibilities as a tenant in a very clear way, and includes the text of the relevant sections of the Massachusetts General Laws & Housing Code.
The current edition (2004) is $20. I paid $15 for the 1996 edition (that I really need to get updated) which was well-worth the cost when I was able to get my security deposit back from a former landlord who made illegal deductions from it.
It may not cover your current situation, but it is an important tool in many other ways.
HTH!
Thanks for the good advice…once again, the dopers have been wise and wonderful.
The details are pretty typical. We moved in together about two years ago, both signed the lease at the time. He had been living here for numerous years prior to that, but a new year was at hand, so we both signed up.
Of course, from my point of view, it’s his fault. Know what I mean? And if you asked HIM, he’d tell you it’s my fault. But from my perspective, he’s done nothing since I moved in. And when I say nothing…I mean NOTHING. I’ve been travelling a lot for work. While I’m gone he spends his time talking to local women on the internet. When I come home, I have dirty sheets to wash, along with my own mess from travelling. He doesn’t do his dishes while I’m gone. He doesn’t buy groceries. He doesn’t pay any bills. Even his own. And so on. He does, however, lecture me like a child about what a mess the house is and how come I haven’t done a better job of keeping it up? He threatens to kick me out if I don’t do a better job.
He is working…and is well employed. He’s depressed and I’ve been struggling with him for YEARS (this went on for two years before we moved in together) to do something about his depression. He engages in NO hobbies (except the aforementioned talking to sluts on AOL). He doesn’t maintain contact with his family, who continue to call concerned about him and attempting to bring him into their circle. He doesn’t have any friends. We have a dog, who he refuses to train. The original arrangement was “boyfriend/girlfriend” and he expects me to be exclusive, which I am. However, we have NEVER had sex, nor does he ever kiss me or touch me in any other way. And in fact, I haven’t had sex in about 4 years.
Anyway, none of that has anything to do with who should move out. I have been looking for someplace to live. And of course, in the Boston area rent and moving expenses are outrageous. Since I consider him the butt of the problem (literally) I feel like it should be his responsibility to either pay some of those expenses or move himself. (Current apartment is priced WELL below market value, in an ideal location and a real deal to get to stay).
You asked for details…there they are. Sordid and stupid, but that’s the way it is.
Is he your roommate or your lover?
The only thing I can think of is to leave brochures laying about for nicer places to live. He may see those and think, I can get out of this dump and go. But if he is depressed he probably wants to stay in his ‘safe’ area and not change his life by moving.
I think you’re kind of stuck here.
I wondered the same thing.
Because if he’s not your lover, what are you doing washing his dirty sheets?
Also, the whole “name on lease” thing works both ways. Let him know that there’s no way he can kick you out, and that you’re a roommate, not a maid.
We are ostensibly boyfriend/girlfriend. But he’s never been able to have sex with someone he cared about. He’s physically able, but not emotionally able unless it’s anonymous and he doesn’t have to make any emotional effort.
So…we’ve been acting like bf/gf, except for the sex part. And of course, there’s a complete lack of affection too…no kissing, no hugging, no…well, nothing at all, really.
Oh, and he doesn’t want me seeing/touching anyone else. Which I originally agreed to, assuming we’d get past this problem of his.
I think you’ve got a whole mighty raft of relationship problems, the lease on an apartment is the least of which.
But, putting them aside, these are not the problems of your landlord, power company, phone company, etc. You signed shared responsibility to pay the bills, so sorting out that you both pay a share is your problem.
The best solution (IANAL) would be to terminate these agreements, by whatever means, and renegotiate on your own. Of course, your landlord is under no obligation to go along with any of this, and your ‘roommate’ can’t be forced to either if he wants to stay put. The only thing that will shift him if you stop paying the bills completely, then the landlord is within their rights to turf him out. But unfortunately this means you go too, as you are equally responsible.
So the chances are whatever solution reached will mean losing your current abode. I’d face up to this, cut your loses and move on. Unless you fancy your chances personally suing your ‘roommate’ for what’s owed, a scenario where the only real winners are going to be the lawyers.
The moral is take care over who you co-sign legal documents with. Though I guess that’s not much help to you now. Sorry.
Yeah, I’m not up to dealing with lawyers or other snakes. I’ve had enough of that. I’m looking for a place to move, and I know the best thing to do is go quickly and quietly.
I guess after several years of trying to fix those OTHER relationship problems you mentioned (“Let’s go to counseling, why don’t you call your doctor, maybe your meds aren’t right for you” and so on) I had some vision of revenge like tossing all his stuff through the window into the street.
Huh. It still sounds like fun. Unfortunately, I’m too civilized for that.
:eek:
Find a room somewhere to rent and get the heck out of there! Run! Don’t walk!