Mom?
Wow, this is really heavy!
About the only things I can think of that are inappropriate for one sex to say to another would be requests to do something to one’s boyparts or girlparts, if one does not possess such parts.
For the record, I proposed to my husband, on the spur of the moment. He said yes, and we saved a lot of time and trouble and angst over when and where he might ask me (as he later said he had been planning to do). Neither of us has any regrets about who asked whom.
I do feel it would be inappropriate for me to ask a second man to marry me, as that would count as Burglaree.
Especially if one sex requested that those things be done to them on the back of a postage stamp 
Same here. I’d assume he was just in it for my dowry.
Voted that one’s no better than the other, but probably should have voted for You Forgot y. Screwing with statistics! Anyway, even as a symbolic gesture, it would probably creep me out just a little and I’d wonder what other old-fashioned values the SO held. I’d feel the same way as a man, I think, if my future fiancée seemed quite sane but wanted a diamond ring or proposal ‘because that’s just what’s done’ – it would give me pause, especially if we planned to have kids.
Um, I’ve got a slight problem parsing that. Do you mean that if I were to ask my GF/SO/partner/wife to do “something” to my boyparts (or her asking me to do “something” to her girlparts), that would be inappropriate? Or if I asked my GF/SO/partner/wife to do “something” to her girlparts, would that be inappropriate?
In that case, I’m afraid we sometimes behave quite inappropriately 
My sweetie (male) proposed, to me (female) and it wasn’t unexpected; I just couldn’t quite say yes.
It’s been six months or so since then, and we’ll probably tie the knot in June in Vegas; he was smart enough to tell me he’d have me married or not, and if I wanted to get married I could just ask him instead. So I did.
I’ve been engaged um…at least 4 or 5 times, all of them with the man proposing, my saying yes, then my changing my mind and fleeing before a date was ever set.
It’s always been a semi-joke that the only way I’ll get hitched if it sneaks up on me, and even our Vegas trip is going to be a very nonchalant ‘Oh, let’s see if we find somewhere that hits us right’. Just the thought of ten tons of drama involved in a big wedding makes me want to run the other direction, so…maybe I just needed to be the one in charge or something. 
Whatever. It’ll be Beginners Luck wedding Third Time’s A Charm, and I suspect the race will be a draw.
Perhaps she means asking your girlfriend to show you her penis?
Anyway, on the off chance my girlfriend and I ever get married (neither of us really want to do marriage, but at the same time we want to be together, so it may break eventually because of the various legal benefits of marriage), we’d probably just discuss it stemming from either a conversation about marriage in general or “if we got married” “wait, if or when” sort of thing. If she wanted me to propose to her, well, we’d probably discuss whether she wanted to be proposed to. It wouldn’t be anything showy, neither she nor I like being the center of attention of a bunch of strangers so yelling on megaphones in Disneyland is straight out. It’d probably just be something mildly charming and quiet if it came to that. Hell, she thinks diamonds are too stereotypical for good ring gems anyway, so we’d save a lot of money on an engagement ring and probably just go to some tiny little ring shop in a mall and get her something with opal for 100 bucks.
However, that doesn’t mean I’m anti-proposal in general. If it works for you, great! I’m sort of a romantic in some cases too, it’s not bad to want a proposal, it just has to work for you and your relationship. This includes if the woman wants to propose to the man, if that’s what works in your specific case, cool! If not, cool! If it has to be all fancy and he/she (heretofore referred to as masculine for simplicity) has to embarrass himself in public or get all dressed up I may think you’re a teensy bit demanding, but it’s still not a big deal and if that’s really what you feel is necessary to make it sufficiently good for marriage, more power to ya. Though for the latter one I would invite you to reflect on why you really need that, because I think the whole “man spends hours planning engagement” thing a liiiiiiiitle destructive, but not enough to get up in arms about it.
She proposed to me, which was great. However the mad ‘what the hell are you doing’ drive to get to get the ring before she proposed almost resulted in it being over before we started. She literally missed the corner and went over the footpath at one point.
Otara
I am female, from a culture where proposals have fallen off the wayside, and where the closest anybody comes to a proposal is along the lines of “you know, maybe we ought’a get papers”.
Even back when formal proposals were expected, they were a lot less… elaborate than what Americans appear to consider normal. My dad’s speech to my mother was an exception back in 1963, most of my uncles “proposed” along the lines of “wanna get married?” In one case, as soon as the relationship started looking serious, she told him “you’re a sailing man and I’ve lost too many men to the sea already: if you want to get serious with me, you have to leave her;” by the next date, he was looking for landbound jobs.
I had one and a half proposals in the US: the half was a panicked reaction to me saying “I’ve realized I don’t want to be with you any more”, the one started by saying “I realize you hadn’t even considered this possibility”… uhm… I’d been telling my friends “oh shit, I’m about to go back home and I think BestBoyfriend is going to propose” for weeks! If I’d thought BB and me had the slightest possibility to get over our communication troubles and have a good marriage I would have dragged him to the justice of the peace months before
I voted that it was ok but not for me. The reason is that I knew that he wasn’t ready yet, and that when he was ready, he’d want to plan something special. So I waited until he was ready and when he was, he had something very romantic planned and it was awesome. I think I would have a) rushed him if I’d proposed earlier and b) disappointed his plans if I’d proposed later. We’d talked about marriage in general for years which is why I knew he wasn’t ready.
I think it’s important to discuss marriage before one proposes, but discussing marriage does not equal a proposal or an agreement to get married.
Discussing and agreeing to it rather than proposing can take off the romantic/sentimental edge. Personally, I don’t care what other women do, but I want to be on the receiving end of that particular romantic/sentimental gesture.
I’m female, and people should do whatever makes them happy.
DH and I started dating during summer break in college. At winter break I realized that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him, but I still needed time to let that realization sink in. A few weeks later (after I’d gone back to school and we were once again long-distance), he realized it, and during our next phone call he brought up the issue.
He: Do you want to get married?
Me: Not right now! [I was only 20 at the time, and 1000 miles away from him]
He: No, I mean after we graduate.
Me: Yes.
He: happy noises
Me: What about you, do you want to marry me after we graduate?
He: Yes.
Me: …
Me: Did we just agree to what I think we just agreed to?
He: I think so. Does this mean we’re engaged?
I didn’t see it as a “proposal” when he asked, just that he wanted to know what I thought. I didn’t assume that it meant anything about his own wishes.
Yes, that’s the sort of thing I meant.
My husband and I had discussed marriage, and our expectations for it pretty thoroughly. We were living together, and had already begun combining our finances.
Then I had a horrific day in court. Just horrendous. We went to the bar after work, and had a few too many. When we got home, he kept calling me upstairs. I thought he just wanted to do it… and I was sooo not in the mood. Finally I trudged upstairs, grumbling about the injustices in the world. My husband had a picture of the ring he bought up on the computer screen. Then he said sheepishly… “let’s get married.” Needless to say, we did end up doing it. The things boys will say to get laid. 
I don’t think it matters in any way whatsover who asks. And in fact, if my asking my husband to marry me meant he had to plan the wedding and I only had to show up… well shit. That would have been awesome.