To avoid any confusion here, for straight people “sex” is defined as “intercourse involving penile insertion in either the anus or vagina”. Gay dopers can define it any way they wish, since penile insertion is not always an option. But the genitalia must be bared at some point.
Wimps. You are speaking to the reigning champion of the highly unpopular celibacy sweepstakes, and let me tell you, after the first year or two, you only complain about it to keep in practice.
On the other hand, the NEXT time probably won’t be 'til June, unless I can convince the male Porpentine that a nonsmoking transatlantic flight won’t kill him. Sigh.
By myself, it’s been a couple hours. With someone else, it’s been about six months. But only because I’m not trying. (Yeah, I don’t really believe that, either.)