My wife and I want a baby. So do I. My wife just turned 38 ( I am 36 1/2). How long do we have left until her menopause? I would think 10 years as an outside figure, but how many 48 year old women get pregnant? Not many?
The woman who plays the mother on “Malcolm in the Middle”, had a kid at 46. She will be in her early 60s when the teenage angst comes up. We know a couple who did not have a kid until the woman was in her 40s. The father is about 52 with a 5 year old boy.
Another issue is that my sperm, in my wife’s words “might be dead”. I am overweight, and I have done a lot of drugs in my not so younger life. Did Jerry Garcia have any children?
I see this as a football game, and we are at the start of the fourth quarter. We need to do something now. My wife has stated that we are going to the hospital to make a baby. Adopting is out, because in her culture, it would show directly that we could not have one on our own and had to settle for second best. I think that’s bull-S, but that is her stance.
Menopause really isn’t the issue–general fertility is. It is often harder for older women to get pregnant and sustain a pregnancy. Certain types of birth defects (e.g. Down syndrome) are more common in babies born to older women.
You can just start trying and see what happens, or you can both have tests to determine the health of your sperm and the regularity of her ovulation cycles.
(I had my first child at 37, after a miscarriage the previous year, and my second at 39. It took about six months to get pregnant each time. )
Off the top of my head, and without thinking too hard, I can name six women of my close acquaintance who had their first child at 38 or older, no problem.
I wouldn’t give up before you start - my goodness! Get your health checked out and start practicing… a lot of women have babies well into their late 30s and early 40s adn it is more common now with better pre-natal care than it was in the past.
My own mother was 37 when I was born. Just give it a try and even if you don’t I wouldn’t look at adoption as second best. Maybe you could help your wife to see that it is giving a needy child a chance at having a loving family.
A better “rule of thumb” than the “30 years after puberty” is to look at your wife’s female relatives, on both sides (her mother’s and her father’s) of her family. Actually, the average age of puberty has gotten much lower than it used to be, while the average age of menopause has risen, with improved health care, nutrition, etc. I recently read that the average age of menopause was around 50. I don’t remember the cite, or I’d post it. Sorry.
I’m 39, and my mother didn’t go through menopause until her late 50’s. I get a lot of crap from women who are older than me telling me I’ll “start having hot flashes any day now”, and I just laugh at them.
Women who smoked during their teen years usually get the menopause at least 5 years earlier than other women (will find cite if necessary but it was my psychology lecturer’s 1991 research so straight from the horses mouth so to speak).
I would get a sperm count test to see if those little guys are mobile and how many of them there are - my husband and I have been trying on and off (he he) for 6 months - I’m 36 and he is 37. He also smoked a lot of dope in his past and has done other drugs as well as the odd std. so I’ve asked him to get a sperm count done if nothing happens this month.
There are tonnes of websites that help you understand when the woman is at her most fertile too.
oh, I forgot to add that many people give the advice to just enjoy having sex and it will happen, however, with men who are really unfit or have bad backs or other medical conditions etc, ejaculation during intercourse is sometimes not an option. Check out anything you can find on doing ‘home insemination’ (that’s the turkey baser method but you don’t use a turkey baser).
a lot of women have babies well into their late 30s and early 40s adn it is more common now with better pre-natal care than it was in the past.