How much do guys actually talk about their "junk"? [warning: foul language]

If you do a search on diggleblop, I think you’ll see that talking about your dick (at least on the Dope) is going to get you shouted out in record times.


The original thread (a failed GQ):
The pitting (which wasn’t terribly different from the GQ):

Thanks for the links, I won’t rehash those arguments here, let me just say “mmmmmph”<---------me trying not to laugh out loud.

What’s the matter, askeptic? Got something in your mouth?

It’s happened maybe a half-dozen times in my life, apparently a lot more than most male Dopers. It can happen as an organic (heh) development of a conversation about sex, whether size matters, and so on.

It’s much more likely to happen with drunk friends at urinals at bars.

I can’t think of any time in the past that I’ve sat around talking about cocks with other men. I can think of one time a semi-related conversation occurred, while at work. First thing in the morning, the office manager (K) comes into the office that L (a young woman) and I share. L is eating a muffin.

K: Morning, Fish.
Me: G’morning.
K: Morning, L.
Me: She says good morning too. She’d answer you herself, but her mouth is full.
L: Yeah, right! You wouldn’t even be a mouthful.
Me: That’s because you’ve got a big mouth.

I just want to point out that the innuendo was hers, not mine. :slight_smile:

Thanks for the etiquette lesson :rolleyes: . Everything in the above post from “Except” to “cock” was a joke. I figured that much was clear.

It wasn’t all that much to me. I wasn’t quite sure what to make of it.

OK, then my bad. I figured that making a comment like that in an office environment was so out of place that it was obviously a joke, but I guess it didn’t come across that way. I take back my snarkiness directed at dwc.

I thought it was one of the best jokes I have seen around here. It didn’t occur to me that you might be serious.

In my whole life, I have only known a few guys (three, I think) who would talk openly their “junk”. Perhaps I have led a sheltered life – I count myself lucky to be sheltered from such conversation. I don’t understand the mentality behind such talk.

Same here.

A bunch of white collar workers talking like lumberjacks would have made a good Kids in the Hall sketch, now that I think about it.

My wife hosted a Bunco party once. I was in the next room watching TV and I couldn’t hear much but occasional snippets would drift through that almost made me blush. I was in the Army and I’ve worked construction and warehouse jobs but I’ve never heard guys go on about sex the way these 30 year old suburban women did. I heard, “…and then the cum got in my ear…”, “I can’t believe he got his whole fist in…”, “Holly, if you relax and use lots of lube it really feels good…”
I never found out who said it but I heard one voice tell my wife, “You don’t have to gargle with it but swallowing won’t kill you.” I want to send her a thank you card for the valiant but pointless effort.

No problem, everything’s cool. I wasn’t sure what country you were in and thought that people might be more lax about sexual harrassment (and what constitutes said harrassment) in other countries. Upon re-reading your original post you refer to inches (versus centimeters), which would imply that you’re probably in the U.S. as well.

Perhaps I’ll start a thread asking about examples of sexual harrassment observed and/or experienced and how perceptions of such varies from one place to another.

When I’m in the office, around other engineers and chemists and such, then no, the guys don’t actually talk about their “junk” all that much. If ever.

But. When I go out into the plant, the union operators do so all the time. Men and women, both. (Regardless of how inappropriate it is for workplace behavior according to our company discrimination policies, BTW.)

This week alone, I’ve walked into the middle of:

“Where’s Gary?” “Getting an operation to rescue the poor gerbil.” “Gerbil? This is Gary; it’s probably a woodchuck.”


[to me] “Hey, you’re young so you don’t want to try this Viagra, but damn! that stuff is great! I tried some this weekend, and the missus…” [remainder edited because I’m still working to scrub the image from my mind]

I know things about the operators I work with that I doubt their wives may know. Scarred urethras from childhood experiments. Anal leakage. And much, much eeew beyond that.

My engineer co-workers and I occasionally trade a clever genital-related insult, if we’re really good buddies. But I am mercifully in the dark of, say, their moobs being sore and swollen lately.

It’s been done. (Sort of.)

Maybe not all the time, but when my friends do it gets pretty damn graphic. What we like, what we don’t, lack of sex, lack of dates, tips, one night stand horror stories. Warning: it can stray from BDSM to UTIs in a matter of seconds. General cock talk aside, sometimes I wish guys traded sex tips more than they seem to.

We don’t because we don’t want to imply that we need any help in that area. You know, it’s a guy thing.