(Note: If you’re averse to mild whininess, you can still skip to the last paragraph and weigh in on my IMHO question.)
I’ve lived here a year. I’ve never needed much help for my doorman, but he’s signed for a lot of packages and always says hello. He usually sits behind a desk, and has never actually held the door for me. I guess that’s weird given his title, but I never really gave it much thought.
For the past month, however, I’ve been on crutches, and it’s really served to highlight the fact that he’s not particularly helpful. While out and about, I’ve gotten used to stumbling through doors, but I think it would be kind of him to offer to hold the door for me when I leave for work.
Also, a couple of times I’ve let him know that I was expecting deliveries, and he agreed to have them sent up to my apartment rather than signing for them himself. In both cases, he signed for the packages minutes later, and then watched me as I comically pushed the packages across the floor and into the elevator, inches at a time, while hopping on my good foot. Maybe I was being passive-aggressively prideful by not specifically asking for assistance, but there was no mistaking that I could have used some help. (In case you’re wondering, he can leave his post, and does so often; he just recruits the nearest maintenance guy to sit in.)
Anyway, all of this whining to ask a more general still-kinda-new-to-NYC question: How much should I tip a doorman for Christmas, and should I dock this guy a bit for being such a lump? Or should I light him up early and see if my last two weeks in a cast suddenly get easier?
Wow, what a jerk. Depending on your building, some doormen aren’t in the habit of actually opening doors for tenants, but he sounds like a real piece of work and deserves zip.
Previous threads on tipping have taught me that people who get little or no tips tend to think of you as cheap rather than something being wrong with their service. And that always reminds me of this message that used to appear on the menu of my favorite restaurant: “If you get good service, tip the waitstaff. If you get poor service, tip the management.”
I used to be a doorman. (It was my summer job all through college.)
Have you given him an occasion in the past to think you might be a bad tipper? (For example, did he ever go out of his way to help you and not receive a tip? You say you have been in the building for a year; did you tip him for Christmas last year?)
Even if you have, though, IMHO it would be really bad form on his part not to give you some basic help when you are on crutches. And unless he has reason to believe you are a complete piker, it would also be extremely stupid on his part not to be more helpful with Christmas coming up.
My inclination would be to give him the bare minimum as a Christmas tip, if at all. I certainly would not give him a big tip just on speculation that his performance might suddenly improve.
I don’t know, when I lived in NYC, the doormen and concierge were EXTRASUPERHELPFUL starting the day after Thansgiving.
If he’s being that much of a lump during tipping season when you’re on crutches, either you did something to annoy him (see Colibri’s post) in the past year or he deserves squat.
As a general rule, when tipping, I went by senority and rank. The building super got the most at $200 ($500 the year we gutted the place and he got all the mods by the board and told them it was all “cosmetic”), down to the part-time maintenance guy who got the least, $20. The day doorman and concierge with the 20 years senority got $100 each and everybody else was somewhere in between.
It depends on the size of your apartment too. You’re going to want to tip less if you’re a renter in a studio rather than an owner in a penthouse, ya know?
One point worth noting is that a doorman isn’t primarily there to open doors and help the tenants. He’s security, and that’s about it. Everything else he does could be considered going above-and-beyond, depending of course, on how management has outlined his responsibilities.
I don’t have any particularly specific advice other than to note that perhaps your expectations are a little unrealistic unless you are living in a particularly high-rent building.
Yeah, although I appreciate the no-tip sentiment, I feel I kind of have to tip him no matter what, since I’m here at least another year, he knows where I live, and I don’t want to lose any packages.
Last year, having lived in the building 2 weeks, I gave him a $20 bottle of wine. My research shows that I probably should have given cash (and more of it) instead, but as a clueless Californian it felt like a nice gift. Somehow I doubt he saw it as a slight, but you never know.
At the time, I had barely encountered the evening and overnight doormen, and didn’t give them anything, but they’ve been much more helpful than the main guy. I’ll definitely tip them a bit more.
And, thanks to that thread I linked, I now know I’m supposed to give my largest tip to the super I’ve never actually met. Who knew?
Oh, and for a little perspective, it’s definitely not a ritzy building, and I live in a tiny studio. My expectations of the doorman were already pretty low. I just need to know how to put a dollar amount on them. I figure $200 for the super is more for a George Jefferson movin’ on up kind of building, but I could be way off-base. I hope not, `cause I’m poor.
I’m not poor, but I’m nowhere near not rolling in it. either. We live in a studio (albeit a nice big one) and make few demands on the staff over the year. I usually give the super twice what I give everybody else, so it’s $20-$25 for everybody else, whether I know them or not, and $40 or $50 for the super. The doormen that hustle (for instance help me unload the car) get tipped along the way. It adds up when you’re talking about 15 or so guys.
The doormen in my building are stationed at a console maybe three feet from the door, and are usually standing, so unless they’re busy they open the door especially if I’m loaded down with groceries. The numbnuts who sit on their butts and make a lame gesture to open the door when I’m already opening it with my bags clattering on the glass usually don’t last very long on the door.
